city folk what do you think about the bison?

[JRDelirious]

Back in 2014 someone I work with attended a meeting in Jackson Hole WY and the registered participants received this greeting e-mail shortly before the date:

Subject: A Note From Our Host In Jackson Hole

Dear (Redacted)

(… paragraph about weather expectations redacted …)

In Wyoming, we know the animals that you see are not the fluffy kind that like people. We say it every year, and every year we have had some sad animal encounters. So, as a Wyoming host, I will say what everyone else from Wyoming will say – don’t touch the animals. There have been 3 grizzly bear incidents, so far this year in Wyoming. One ate a researcher. One ended in a dead bear. One ended in a mauling. Bears are not nice, and this time of year, they are eating all they can to store fat to hibernate. Buffalo, by nature, are cranky, skittish and stupid animals. They pose for photos right up until the time they charge and gore you. Leave them alone. Even small animals like skunks, raccoons and badgers can be fairly disagreeable. Take pictures, but use common sense.

There are some great fishing guides who will take you out to some of the best fishing in the world. If you like to fish, this is the place. (You can touch the fish.)

Tom Lubnau
Speaker of the House
Wyoming

So remember, you may touch the fish. Good to know. The bison/American buffalo OTOH are cranky and stupid but will still let you get close enough to then stomp you. And he should know.

The matter-of-fact statement about how “one [bear] ate a researcher” still makes this the best official business e-mail I saw that year.