Cold Stone ice cream assholes

The BBQ Pit
1

So I went to Cold Stone creamery last night for the last time. This ties in with the other Pit thread on snobish vs. white-bread establishments. I ordered what I thought was a simple enough request: “A waffle cone with one scoop of Mint Chip and one scoop of Cookie Dough”.

But this was apparently soo far outside the norm for the fuckwit behind the counter that it was irrational on my part to even ask for it. I realize that they are the fucking Starbucks of ice cream establishments, and that they make each scoop to order, and all that horseshit.

Ice Cream Lady: “Sir, we don’t have flavors like that …(unintelligible)… We take the basic flavors and mix in the ingredients you want.”

Me: “I understand that. Could you please give me whatever your flavor is that is close?”

ICL: “I’m sorry sir, but I need to know what you want to go in it”

Me: “Never mind. Forget it”.

Mind you, on their big list-o-flavors that are their specialties up on the fucking wall, is one called “Mint Mint Chocolate Chocolate Chip” and another one “Cookie Dough and brownie bullshit”. Ok, so I approximated the name of the latter.

There is a GIANT LIST OF FLAVORS that they ostensibly make there, among which are 2 that are pretty much exactly what I just asked for, but apparently my oversimplification of their bullshit trendy hip mad cool edgy ordering process offended them so much that they were too confused to fulfill my request.

Why do businesses make it so difficult to give them money in exchange for a product?

What, my instructions about the mint chip were unclear? Take some mint-flavored ice cream and PUT SOME FUCKING CHOCOLATE CHIPS IN IT.

The cookie dough? HOW DOES EVERY OTHER VENDOR MAKE COOKIE DOUGH ICE CREAM??? MAKE ME SOME OF THAT!!! Vanilla ice cream + chunks of cookie dough + maybe god forbid some fucking oreo cookies in it.

Holy shit, what was so unconventional about what I asked for?

So I hereby add Cold Stone Creamery to my list of businesses I will never again frequent, with the likes of Quizno’s and Jamba Juice.

Quiznos put lettuce in my sandwich after I asked them nicely not to, even after the lady making the sandwich smilingly repeated back to me “No lettuce, gotcha!”.

Jamba Juice forgot to give me my pretzel along with my shake.
In every service-type job I ever had, my bosses always drilled into me how it takes a long time to gain new customers, and 2 seconds to lose one. It’s not my job to continually remind people how I want my food, or do their work for them in explaining step-by-step how to make it. It’s their job to do it right, and do it right the first time. If the manager is not sufficiently talented to make the college dropouts behind the counter realize this and meet the proper standard, it’s not my problem, I’ll just take my business elsewhere.

Economic darwinism. I am the invisible hand of the market, biiiootch!

So I went across the street to the local movie theater’s concession stand, and ordered “A waffle cone with one scoop of mint chip and one scoop of cookie dough”. THAT bright young employee said “Coming right up sir!” About 20 seconds later, I had my ice cream cone dripping in my hot little hands, the way god intended. And you know what? It was cheaper, too!

2

So…because you didn’t follow the basic instructions of the place of business, they’re assholes? If I remember correctly, there are suggestions of flavors up on the menu boards. But the basic premise of Cold Stone Creamery is that you pick a basic flavor of ice cream, then pick add-ins. There are no pre-made or even pre-formulated flavors there. You could, I suppose, just get a scoop of a basic flavor (vanilla or chocolate or whatever), but at CSC prices, that would be kind of dumb.

If you wanted mint chocolate chip, you would get a scoop of mint and ask them to add chocolate chips (or chunks or shavings or intricately sculpted miniature scottie dogs…whatever). If you wanted cookie dough, you would get vanilla ice cream and ask them to put in chunks of cookie dough…oh, wait…I see you already realize how that works. So…it’s not that they’re assholes, but that you’re too freakin’ impatient to wait two minutes for them to mix everything in, when that very fact (the picking flavors and waiting two minutes for them to mix everything in) is the basic premise of the store. I see.

Do you go to Disneyworld and bitch about all the freaks in costumes lolling around taking pictures with kids, too?

3

Wow. It’s just an ice cream cone, dude.

4

I went there one time. Couldn’t see the attraction of eating melted ice cream, and paying $5.00 for the privilege.

5

Customers like you, CynicalGabe, make the employees of places like CSC very nervous, because it’s just too easy to say; “Oh just give me whatever,” and then complain about whatever you DO get. I am not implying that you are the kind of maladjusted crank who would do this, but those people are out there.

At my job, I take orders out of catalogues and we have strict instructions NOT to accept orders like; “Oh just give me a unisex assortment of birthday-themed wrapping paper and twelve assorted stickers, six for boys and six for girls.” We COULD do that, but we don’t, because orders like that are a liability. Call back when you have item numbers.

6

They have a business model and in that model the customer must specify exactly what goes into their ice cream. If you want premade flavors, cheaply then go to the standard ice cream place and you’ll be happy… as you evidently were. I guarantee you that employee asked the way he did because he was TRAINED to ask specifically and has probably been burned before by idiot and or shady customers who request a ‘standard’ flavor… get it made up, then claim that wasn’t what they really wanted. They make a high end product and they charge accordingly, people who buy it tend to appreciate that it’s tailored to them. That is the whole IDEA of the business… if you don’t want that type of service, why go there?

7

If Cold Stone wants me to pay outrageous prices for their product, the least they can do is hire staff who don’t deliberately make ordering difficult. Mint chocolate chip and cookie dough are pretty basic flavors, and if Ice Cream Lady can’t figure out how to make them without alienating a customer, her store won’t last long.

I preferred Baskin Robbins, anyway.

8

No kidding. I hate CSC for that very reason. Just make the cone and let me leave. BR gets it right every time…CSC makes me analyze the ingredients and develop a formula so the wage slave can put it together. Just give me the freaking cone already! If I wanted to do science I’d go back to school and sub in a Chem. class.

9

Yeah, judging from the lines at our Cold Stone here (even in the winter), I don’t think they’re in any danger of going out of business anytime soon.

Besides, as others have said, they don’t HAVE particular pre-made flavors. If someone orders mint chip, but the person behind the counter makes it with vanilla ice cream and mint chocolate chips, as opposed to the mint ice cream and plain chocolate chips that the customer wants, then you’ve got a fuck-up anyway. I’m sorry, but I don’t think it’s that fucking difficult for the customer to say “I’d like one scoop mint ice cream with chocolate chips for a mix-in in a waffle cone.”

E.

10

Here, here. Not that I go to Cold Stone. Once was enough…I’m still shivering. Not from the cold, mind you, from the prices. When I’m in the mood for something precious, I reach for Ms. Malienation, not Cold Stone ice cream.

Sorry to here about you and Quizno’s, CynicalGabe. C’mon, give them another shot. Try a Smokehouse Beef Brisket sub or a Prime Rib Cheesesteak w/ horseradish sauce. You’ll feel better.

11

They’re very popular here, too.

I guess I don’t see why a good counter person wouldn’t simply say “Sure! mint or vanilla ice cream?” etc. Would it not be better to spend an extra minute (assuming the store doesn’t have a line of customers waiting) than to lose a customer?

12

If I remember correctly, Cold Stone has peppermint ice cream as well as regular mint ice cream. So which would the server make it with? Also, as the OP pointed out, cookie dough has cookie dough and vanilla. He then went on to say that it could also have Oreos. Well, which is it? Oreos or not? Since extra toppings cost more, does the server risk giving the customer a more expensive ice cream cone or not?
You went to an ice cream shop where the whole point is to control how you want your ice cream. You then asked for an ice cream cone that isn’t even standard, and apparently refuse to take the extra time to tell the person how you want it. I really can’t get behind this pitting.

13

I’m going to defend CynicalGabe here and say that yes, while Cold Stone Creamery may have that business model (and God help us all if we deviate from the sacred business model!) the appropriate, helpful thing for the Cold Stoner to do would’ve been to offer, I don’t know, a suggestion to him, based on what he wanted. I know that runs directly contrary to the hipster-slackertude ethos, but hey, sometimes you gotta make allowances for the old-schoolers who may not be able to flash-memorize the entire Byzantine ordering procedure of one of these national-chain phenomena after one glance at the giant fucking wall of menus, y’knowI’msayin’?

Yeah, they probably won’t go out of business anytime soon—hip hip hooray. Another success story for corporations that invest all their money into marketing, flair, and nationwide saturation, and none into training their snot-drip drones how not to be assholes.

14

He didn’t jump through the right hoop – bad customer – no soup for him!

Any half decent server should have assisted him in creating what he asked for, rather than dissing him.

15

But the counter person told him that all he needed to do was tell him what to put in his cone. How hard is it to look at the list of flavors, choose ‘mint ice cream’, and then look at the mix-ins, and ask for chocolate chips? The folks behind the counter aren’t mind readers, and you can be damn sure that for every five people for whom ‘cookie dough’ means ‘vanilla ice cream with cookie dough’, there’s always the one asshole for whom ‘cookie dough’ means ‘chocolate ice cream with cookie dough and Oreo cookies’. And the counter drones have no way of knowing which person they’ve got.

I just don’t see what’s so difficult about taking a second to look at the list and specify the exact items that you want. What, it takes an extra 10-20 seconds, if that? It’s even easier if you look at the menu before you get to the front of the line. The counter person is just trying to do their job.

OTOH, if someone wants to pit them for singing, I’m all over that one.

E.

16

Calling a substance which includes Guar gum, Cellulose Gum, Carageenan, Mono & Diglycerides and polysorbate 80 a “Super-Premium Ice Cream” does not strike me as terribly honest. Does the stuff even melt when it gets warm?
Save your five bucks, go to the grocery store, and get some good stuff.

17

Because they have these flavors up on the wall, I don’t see how my asking for them violated some tenet of their faith. :slight_smile:

18

I pit the managers for forcing their drones to sing that horrid song every time some yahoo drops a penny in the tip jar. There are few things more sad than listening to 4 or 5 employees sadly mutter something off-key whenever Skipper the manager hits the bell. Why not add some whips and chains while we’re at it?

19

Hey, and you notice how in the movies when someone goes into a bar and says “gimme a beer,” they never ask what kind? They just fill a mug and slam it on the bar.

I appreciate the simplicity, even though in real life that’d most likely mean it was Budweiser.

20

It melts very quickly, and has terrible guar-y mouth-feel. Consumer Reports pointed out that the ice cream itself isn’t very good, and is really just a base for the add-ins.