Congressman Bob Ney pleads guilty, postpones resignation for $$$

Congressman Bob Ney (R-Ohio) pleaded guilty today to charges of conspiracy and making false statements. But he declined to resign his seat in Congress, reportedly because he needs the money:

That’s another three months away, or more than $41,000 dollars in salary and benefits. It takes a lot of nerve to admit you are guilty, but continue to pick the pockets of the the people you betrayed. Let us hope the judge sentences him to the maximum fine of $60,000.

The Culture of Corruption knows no shame.

I looked at this and I thought, you know, you’re right. But then I saw this

and then I remembered this

and then I thought to myself Cid, you picked a bad day to quit drinking Nyquil.

:feeble yet wholesome grin smiley?:

Awww, c’mon guys, have a heart! Do you really want to see a former Congressman standing by the side of the freeway with a sign reading “Will Whore for Food?”

Yes. Yes, I do.

Perhaps his recently departed associate, Mark Foley, might find some work for him to do. Not that there’s anything wrong with it!

January 19th is my birthday. I think that money being sent to me would restore my faith in Congress.

I mean, y’all don’t want a young voter feeling apathy towards the system, right?

Right?

taps mic Hel-lo?

Eh, it was worth a shot.

Touhey added, “I told him this was the best course of action, because without his paycheck he can’t pay my retainer.”

:slight_smile:

Hey, he has to pay for rehab, too, you know. Isn’t that the drill? I did it. But it was the booze (or drugs or sex or whatever) and I’m gonna go to rehab and get all better.

Was hoping more along the lines of outrage, fury, fierce committment to change…

Look at it from Ney’s perspective: everybody already hates him and knows he’s a crook, so what’s he got to lose? He ran out of shame many, many bribes ago.

John, I’m sure I speak for all when I assure you of our unstinting support in this difficult time.

Another one bites the dust, or at least will soon.

Oh, I wasn’t talking about me… I’m going to get filthy drunk tonight-- and I’ll be all better!!

If he does, I’ll take pictures.

(Pity me, for I am in his district.)

Why? Have you no dancing shoes?

Oh, I can celebrate his downfall, but he’s still not gone. His handpicked successor hasn’t lost (pleaseletitbeyet), and I’m in Ohio, dammit, that’s enough reason to pity me right there!

Oh, yes, of course. Ohio. How thoughtless of me.

Come out to CA! We can never have enough goddesses out here!!

That would be SO demeaning to the actual hard-working whores walking that pavement trying to turn an honest trick…

[procedural aside]

Got news stories busting out right and left about Pubbie Congresslime…Ney, Kolbe, Hastert, Wheldon…oh, dearie me! There is such a thing as too lavish a cornucopia, four, five, six or more seperate Pit threads. No, that simply won’t do. Perhaps we could proclaim this thread the Corrupt Pubbie Derision and Outrage Thread, and then have a handy catch-all as revelations unfold?

Is there an established procedure for that sort of thing, or is it simply a mutual and cooperative hijacking?