Ladyfingers?
Do NOT forget tapioca pudding.
I am going to suggest a departure from the general suggestions here. It may be that I have a genteel nature, but a lot of these suggestions seem rather, well, crass to me. I suggest that you go for a more gourmet approach. Think about having foods that are attractive and tasty, rather than just picking things that look like dicks. I can offer some suggestions, should you want to go that way.
Do you have a grill? If so, here is a thought:
For an appetizers, stuffed mushrooms (basically, take the stems out of mushrooms and use them, celery onions and bread to make stuffing and then stuff and bake the caps. Other finger food could be some nice cheeses and high end crackers, perhaps some pate.
For the main course, get a bunch of Snapper (or some other white fish) filets, some black sesame seeds and some fresh basil. Egg wash and encrust the fish with finely chopped basil on one side and the sesame seeds on the other. Grill until flaky and tender. Perhaps a nice side dish would be some roasted new potatoes (or just really small red potatoes) and some fiddlehead ferns (if in season in your area). If not some nice crisp asparagus would be good.
I don’t know, something like that.
Too bad you’re not in Chciago, I’d send you to the Nigerian lunch truck where you can get a hearty (according to those who have tried it, NOT ME!) dish of bull penis on rice with vegetables.
If you’re going to use an exact quote from Emily Post, you should include the attribution. 
Maybe, before the evening is over, some of the ladies may be eating at the ‘Y’. 
Oops! My bad. 
Oh, like food can’t be attractive, tasty, and look like a dick? I’m sorry, but I just have to disagree with you there.
Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing inherently unattractive about a wanger per se, I just think that a meal centered around dick shaped food is inelegant. Just my take.
Well, yes, but it’s a sex toy party. The bad dirty jokes are sort of inherent. Especially with food.
Funniest. Post. Ev…ummm, well, in quite a long time. 
Right, but if we do it my way you have built in cognitive dissonance. The inherently hilarious nature of the dildo would be enhanced by the contrast with the elegant food and atmosphere.
Okay, I want you to do all my catered parties, binarydrone. You sound like way too much fun.
Will any of the guests be … um … “trying out” the sex toys while they’re there?
It might make a difference as to what kind of food you want to serve, and whether energy drinks should be included.
Had an idea at work… Open face Roast Beef sandwhiches.
Now, lets see how many clones are out there.
Call the party by its correct name: The Schtupperware party!
Urban Outfitters sells boob and penis shaped pasta shells that you can cook with.
This is the best thread I’ve ever started.
I think “crass” and “inelegant” is exactly what these ladies are looking for. This is not an occasion for subtlety, nor is it a group that would prefer it. I don’t really know any of these women except via CCL, but this is going to be a lot less “tee hee…a dildo…tee hee” and a lot more “JESUS H. CHRIST would you look at the size of this bad boy!”
I’m definitely going to be looking for some penis-shaped pasta. I like a cold pasta salad with barbecued chicken, and I like the puttanesca idea; I might try to incorporate those flavors into a salad.
If I could get a penis-shaped cake pan or similar vessel, I’d like to make a Jello shot mold. It might not be easy to make sure the alcohol is evenly distributed, though.
Of Montreal is a band, one of those Elephant 6 psychadelic pop bands the music nerds are always on about.
Here ya go. My brother has his pantry stocked with pasta boobs.