Poof
You are transported back in time and control a major Hollywood studio during the 1930’s. But due to your lack of experience in managing a major hollywoood studio, all your movies majorly flop. Because of this change in history, the movie boom that made Hollywood what is it today ends up never happening. Hollywood, California itself ends up turning into a ghost town.
I wish I was at my ideal weight of 180 lbs.
You are now 180 lbs of chicken fat.
I wanna be a Psychic Advisor To The Stars! 
<Kazaaar> There are over 50 billion stars out there, and each one wants Psychic advice, luckily you get a bicycle to travel between them.
I wish this thread will go on forever.
this thread goes on forever but you are suddenly banned forever too so you cant continue corrupting wishes
i wish for a small lesser spotted pink duck
** hocus-focus **
To power the SDMB servers forever (thus ensuring the continuance of this thread), the hampsters are replaced with Bippy in a Matrix-style power plant.
I wish for train fare ($4.50 at rush hour).
Simulpost!
** ominous thunder **
You spot a small pink duck at a carnival game. The game is rigged, of course, so that the player is always a losser. You spend all your money in a futile attempt to get the duck.
(I still wish for train fare.)
you get train fare and then the transit system is destroyed in an apocalyptic battle of the trains
i wish for a sausage name baldrick
–PLONK–
BigDaiv’s love sausage is now called ‘Baldrick’ though its size amazes all who see it they just can’t help but laugh when they hear its name.
I wish I didn’t have to kill the next poster.
Kazelbov! You got your wish, and now you have to kill the next poster after this.
I wish I ruled Ireland between 1932 and 1975, instead of Eamon De Valera…
You don't kill me, because you realize you are madly in love with me and you can't imagine logging on to the SDMB and not seeing anymore posts from me.
I wish my legs would stay smoooooth, so I would never have to shave them again.HA HA Governor Quinn, he’s not going to kill me, see my pervious post
your legs stay smoooth forever and you never have to shave again however the rest of your body hair grows at a super accelerated rate including your new beard and chest hair
i wish i was a mobile phone
You are a mobile phone. One that belongs to a really, like, totally, whacky, girl, who, like, talks, like all the time, and like, uses the word "like" a million times, like in one conversation. You get annoyed by this and pray one day she will forget to charge your batteries and you will be out of your misery.
I wish I could have a nice cold Bacardi Raz[sup]TM[/sup] now.You could have a nice cold Bacardi Raz now. If one were available, that is. Which it isn’t. Because I had the last one. But you’re welcome to watch me enjoy it.
I wish I knew once and for all which is better: Spain, or fishsticks.
Zoop! You know know the answer. It’s Spanish fishsticks, which you now have to eat for the rest of your life.
I still wish I was ruler of Ireland between 1932 and 1975, instead of Eamon De Valera…
you were the ruler in an alternate dimension however in that dimension ireland is the isle of man so you rule practically nohting and in the second world war amreica a bombs the isle of man whne a pilot mistakes it for japan so it is a non existant are by the end of your reign
i wish for a printer
KaBLANG
BigDaiv, here’s your printer – none other than Gutenberg himself! Of course, he’s five and a half centuries obsolescent, not to mention being very, very dead. But still!
I wish Prince Charles would throw over Camilla for me.
–izztwizzyletsgetbust–
Prince Charles throws Camilla into a dungeon, and goes for EddyTeddyFreddy, unfortunately he thought you were a man, when he finds out you aren’t, he throws you into the same dungeon and starts asking where he can find Esprix.
I wish to find true love and happyness.
ZZAPPP
You find true love and happiness. Unfortunately, it’s possessed by Donald Rumsfeld, and he won’t give any of it to you.
(I did get an A on my test, btw. W00t.)
I wish I was loved by everyone, but not in that creepy stalker way.
pooof!
You’re turned into a thanksgiving turkey. You are, indeed, loved by everyone in a non-creepy-stalker way. For about ten minutes. Mmmmm…
I wish I was drinking a bottle of rare 40-year-old vintage Port.