Could you please shut the fuck up about how much I sleep?

The BBQ Pit
81

Okay, so I’d have you arrested for assault. Think I’m kidding? 'Cause I’m not.

I mean, I’m sympathetic to Esprix wanting to sleep and he’s right that people should shut up about how much he sleeps. His rant was reasonable; people are snapping at him for something that is not their business. But this “Wahhhh, I need my coffee” bit is pathetic. It’s a breakfast drink. Get over it. You don’t have a right to be avoided until you’ve consumed a breakfast drink. What’s next? You can’t look at me in the morning before I’ve eaten an Egg McMuffin? Nobody may speak above a whisper before I’ve had a bagel?

If buddy wants tp sleep 12 hours a day that’s his business. Don’t come to the damned office and ask like an ass because you “need” your coffee. You do not “need” a coffee any more than you “need” a hit of coke. Coffee is nice, it tastes good, and it does help wake you up, but you’re capable of being a social human being once you’re up and out of bed. When you’re around other human beings, you treat them with common fucking respect, and that includes, when they say “Good morning,” you say it back to them. If you can’t deal with people until you’ve had you coffee you need to either see a doctor about your being a drug addict, or keep a goddamned coffee machine in your bedroom.

and then CanvasShoes adds:

My Christ, what a load of complete bullshit. I can’t believe anyone can say this with a straight face. I mean, are we actually at the point now where being POLITE is too much to ask? What the hell is happening to modern humans that “Good morning” is now some sort of enormous tax on your well-being? Suck it up, force a smile, and say “Good morning.” You are capable of doing it. Do it. There are days I’m sick, I feel like shit, but amazingly I don’t take it out on other people.

You know, when you just woke up I can understand mumbling and shuffling around and being a bit spaced. The brain needs a few minutes to get kick-started. By the time you get to the office, you’re awake. Stop being such a fucking baby. Honest to Christ, if you aren’t awake by the time you get to the office, you need to see a doctor. How did you get dressed and drive to work?

One you step out of your house you’re obligated by the value of common decency to be polite and helpful to other humans. I cannot think of any reasonable excuse for behaving in any other manner, save the most extreme emergencies or emotional distress. If you are incapable of doing that you’re either a total ass-head or you have a problem that needs fixing.

82

What are you? The wake up police? Please DO read the entire posts before you go off on a side rant. NONE of we zombies in this post are asking for special “coffee” treatment. NOR are we asking to have the right to “snap people’s heads off”.

What I was explaining to the wrong girl, for the most part, was that our “mumbling and glaring” did NOT mean what she was taking it to mean. In other words, it likely meant we were dazedly focusing.

OTOH, no one has the “right” to demand that another human being respond to them. Period. If you have a co-worker, and you have had this co-worker for some time and are well, well aware that this person needs a few minutes of “getting clear” time before interraction with other humans. WHY, oh WHY is this such a blatant affront to you??? You do NOT “own” this person or his/her behaviour. And as I said (and as many of the zombies in this thread have said) our morning dazedness has nothing to do with you!!!

So why on earth is just allowing them their behaviour some crime against humanity in your eyes?

Getting dressed and driving don’t require talking. Look, just because YOU don’t face the same difficulty does NOT make it a less real one. As for being a BABY? Look sweetheart!, I’ve had two 9 pound babies sans drugs! And that’s one of the easier things I’ve done in my life, I’m quite tough enough thank you very much!!

We’re “Obligated”??? Says who? There is no law that requires human beings to talk. And again, I did not say that people had the right to be snappish and cranky. I merely asked for the right not to have a ton of perky little “good morning, how are yous, and other chatter” just LONG enough to gather my thoughts.

If we spend the first 10-30 minutes at work drinking coffee and reading email and only then do we feel together enough to turn around and talk, so what? What does it harm the other workers? How is it any skin off of their teeth??? I’d like to know how simply being silent and gathering our thoughts so that we CAN put our best foot forward with our fellow employees is “outside the bounds of ‘common decency’”???

It’s rather MORE common decency to “come alive” so that we can them give them our best selves than to reply “glumgph mrrmb” to their good morning and have them wonder if we hate them.

You know, this is very, very interesting. I bet you’re one of those “morning larks” that has his “testy” behaviour at night (judging from your post to which I’m replying), and then goes on to have hissy fits because “people are obligated to be in bed and shut up by at LEAST 8pm like a ‘normal’ person”!!! I hope your poor wife isn’t a night owl.

83

RickJay, I can see a couple places where communication is breaking down here. For example:

No, I really am not. Not before 10 AM. Honestly. This ties into the following quote:

See, if it’s around, say, eight in the morning, I’m not human. Not even remotely.

Ah, but we’re not sick, we’re semi-conscious. I can be so sick I’m running to the bathroom at regular fifteen minute intervals to dry heave into the commode, and still be perfectly friendly and polite. Because even if I’m sick, my mind still functions more or less okay. It’s not at all the same thing as being up in <shudder> the AM.

Your brain needs a few minutes. Mine needs an hour and a half.

This seems like a very hard idea for you to grasp, which I don’t mean as an insult. Morning people can almost never get this, for some reason. But we really. Cannot. Help it. I don’t want to act like that in the morning. I’d love to spring out of bed and be polite and social and, y’know, human. I feel bad when I snap at someone in the mornings, usually as soon as I do it. But I’m not conscious enough to edit myself before I speak at that time of the day. So I generally just don’t speak. Which can be rude, but at least isn’t openly insulting.

And, incidentally, I don’t drink coffee.

84

Ya know, I was half joking in my last post, but ya know what, RickJay?

I don’t have to say a damn word to you if I don’t want to.

85

Stop, you’ll make me sad.

You people obviously don’t get it. Just because you decided that to be a antisocial pricks and use “not enough sleep” as an excuse does not mean that the rest of us are going to walk on eggshells to avoid disturbing you.

Once you are up, suck it up and act like a normal human being. Or go hide in your room until you get your shit together. How do you plan to function in the real world where you may have to get up at 7:00 am to go to work? What will you do if you have an 8:00am presentation? Do you think you will last long snapping at your boss and coworkers or lurching around like a zombie?

You know why someone sleeping 16 hours a day pisses me off? Because unless you are suffering from depression or narcolepsy, it is the characteristic of someone who is completely self absorbed. I have not seen anything in the posts in this thread to indicate otherwise.

86

Not at all. Feel free to sleep and wake up whenever you please. I’m not going to force you to act a certain way. I am, however, not obligated to cooperate in your little pretend disability act, either. If you’re going to act like an asshole, you should expect that people will think you’re an asshole.

I’m always up later than my wife; I quite literally cannot remember three occasions in the last twelve months when I went to bed before she did. I much prefer sleeping in, actually; on weekends I’m in bed until 10:30 or later. I’m very tired in the morning on work days. But once I get to work I’m pleasant and nice to everyone. You know why? Because it’s the right thing to do.

chique:

And nobody has to AVOID saying “good morning” to you if they don’t want to. You don’t have a “right” to have other people suppress themselves and walk around you on tiptoes. Deal with it. You’re free not to respond, it’s a free country. You’re free to be impolite and grumpy all you want. But the flip side to that is that you have no right to anyone’s cooperation in your decision to be a jerk prior to drinking coffee.

Miller, sorry, but I simply do not believe that you are physiologically incapable of acting with a reasonable degree of politeness at any time of the day. I can believe that some people sleep at different times. I can believe that some people need more sleep and some need less. I absolutely do not believe this nonsense about being incapable of social interaction an hour and a half after you wake up. A healthy adult human can function at a basic level even when it’s early, late, or in the middle of the night. I’m not even a morning person - I’d much prefer to sleep to 11 every day if I could, and stay up late - and I simply don’t buy it.

87

I just want to highlight the irony of msmith calling someone else an antisocial prick.

I am in the real world, and I function just fine. Luckily, the lathe at work doesn’t care if I don’t want to chat with it in the morning. I’ve been working at this job for, gosh, almost ten years now and my behavior has yet to get me fired or even sternly reprimanded.

Deep seated emotional problems?

Again with the irony!

RickJay: I’m sorry you don’t believe me, but it’s just God’s honest truth. I’d act differently if I could, but experience had taught me that it’s usually a futile effort. Anyway, rest assured that I make every effort to limit my contact with other human beings prior to ten or eleven o’clock. I may be an asshole, but only in the AM.

88

Actually I am a very social prick.

At least I can force a smile and a hello before noon, even if I do feel like crap.

So why can you wake yourself enough to make the baseball bats, chair legs and dowels without catching your clothing in a spinning leg yet you are unable to manage the most basic levels of polite communication.

89

I’m sorry, but I still fail to see how my not conforming to your control freak ideas of what is “correct” behaviour (i.e. answering your “good morning” the way YOU think it should be done) is tantamount to behaving like an “a$$hole”?

For one thing, and I’ll outline my morning in a minute. I am not one of the “snappish” ones. I was merely pointing out that some of the night owls are.

My personal “modus operendi” in the morning is to answer greetings with a softly spoken “hey,” or “hi”.

It’s answering someone rather than ignoring them, and is neutral and polite, while still affording me a less painful “being forced to speak” episode. It also forestalls lots of “follow-up” chatter from insistant “behave ‘my way or the highway’” morning people.

A good “for instance”:

After two hours of sleep last night, I had to go to an 8am meeting that was to last until 2pm today. When I got there, (out of our 10-12 employees, three of us are NOT morning people).

To other people’s greetings and introductions I softly replied “hi”. Only later, after I started to wake up a little did it occur to me that "hey? there were some people I didn’t know, that not only said “hi” but “hi I’m so and so”.

And heck, all I said was a soft little “hi” and as much of a smile as I could tell was on my numb little face. If I’d been halfway alive it would have occured to me that my name would have been good too.

As to your insulting statement “your pretend disability act”? Grow up! None of us on this thread have asked for special treatment. No one has said “dim the lights” and/or “talk softly” and/or “walk on tiptoes” til I wake up.

Some people have said (paraphrased) “yeah, I’m liable to be cranky”. But hell, rick, YOU’VE been cranky this whole thread, and no one’s accusing you of having a “pretend disability”.

Also, I never said it was a “disability” at all.

It’s a fact that some humans have circadian rythyms that are completely opposite those of most of the population. Those of us that are “owls” have to either work night shift, or other shift work, or simply suffer through the morning.

WE are more than happy to leave it at that, we get to work, we’re quiet and non-invasive, and then we hit our stride and are fine. It is you, and people like you who are bucking the system and babyishly insisting that you have things your way.

I have not ever asked anyone to “walk around me on tiptoes”.

I never said any one HAD to avoid saying “good morning” if they didn’t want to. “The Wrong Girl” SPECIFICALLY asked how to avoid getting grouched at by “her” morning zombies. And I told her.

I also didn’t say other people “had” to supposedly “suppress” themselves either. What I DID say was that if these morning people KNOW their co-workers and have worked with them for some time, then common sense would dictate what is the most effective solution. If they want to keep banging their heads against the wall and still getting the same bad result, they’re welcome to it. It IS a free country.

They can say “good morning” to their zombie co-workers til the cows come home. All that is, is being a control freak and involving one’s self in a power struggle over someone ELSE’S actions.

In other words the “morning person” has it in his mind that the “zombie” WILL behave in the allegedly “correct” way as outlined by the morning person, rather than just simply “living and let live” so to speak. It’s not about the morning person’s right to say good morning, it’s about his need to be “Right” and control, or attempt to control the other person’s actions and behaviour to HIS satisfaction.

90

NO! mrsmith, You are the one not getting it! Not one of us has asked anyone to “walk around on eggshells”. A few posters have admitted to being cranky or snappish, but were also very quick to point out that that was only if they were pushed and harrassed, which they went on to say didn’t usually happen.

Also, Esprix very clearly explained that a 16 hour sleep day was not an everyday occurance and that he did, in FACT, have a regular job, chores, life etc.

What will I do when I have to get up at 7am? Well let’s see, I have to teach an aerobics class that STARTS at 7am m/w/f. I have to get up at 545am. I get to the University at 630 and go over the steps and callouts out loud in my car.

But wait! That’s not all, I also teach 2 noon time aerobics classes and 2 t/th 530pm aerobics classes. And there are my 2 hour Mon/wed night dance classes, THOSE in addition to my “real” job as a environmental project manager. Oh yeah, and managing the dance team that performs for charities around town.

Mother of two kids, one full-grown (whom I just bought a ticket in order for her to visit CA) and one 11 year old. Girlfriend to a normal man who needs the normal “maintanence and care”. I’m also a sister and daughter and help out family as required or needed.

Yeah, I’m pretty selfish and self-absorbed alright. Gee, how selfish of me to be dazed and confused for those 10 - 30 minutes in the am. Or to take long naps on occasional weekends, yessirree, I’m a bum!!!

None of my co-workers (and I’ll bet few if any of any of the OTHER posters in this thread) have ever come around me screaming "HEY!! whatsamatta you??? I said “GOOD MORNING, Now YOU talk”!!! Nor has anyone had that attitude that if I’ve not answered them right away, or answered them softly and simply and with something other than a return “good morning” that I was somehow “pretending a disability” or requiring special treatment.

In fact, in my 30+ years in the workforce, I’ve never heard anyone behave like such “Good Morning Nazis” as you and rickjay.

I’ve asked this question before, but neither you, nor the other one have answered it. What is it to YOU if someone answers you dazedly, or not at all?

Again, you are not “entitled” to have anyone say or do anything, just because YOU happen to think it’s the “correct” way to act. You have no more right to demand a response from someone than they have to demand that you shut up.

91

well…let’s see, I was up 'til 4:00am last night and slept 'til 2:30pm today. I only got up then because I had a few errands I had to get done before it got dark again. My dog got up then, only because I got up. On nights before work, I have a hard time making it to bed before 2am, and, if I’m at work before 10:30 am, it’s unusual. I work the same amount of time as everyone else, except a few die-hards who are always there, but I work later…In fact, my most lucid thinking usually occurs in a window between about 11:00pm and 1am (fortunately I’m not still at work by then).

When I was in graduate school, I split rent with someone who was a morning person and got up at some ungodly early hour (not sure what that hour was, 'cause I was never awake that early). He’d often work a full 8 hours and return back to the apartment around 1pm just as I was eating breakfast and reading the newspaper before harding in to the lab.

I had no choice but to get up early for classes in college and high school. Thus, I decided that the schools I went to were inherently biased towards morning people. There were times I would be only semi-awake, but have to take a test at 8 or 9am. I bet my GPA would have been a few tenths higher if I could have taken the classes at a more reasonable time (say 8pm to 2am).

I must admit that I have a bit of a sneering attitude towards early risers. Mostly, it’s in tune with what other people have said in this thread about the holier-than-thou attitude that some of them have towards people who abhor being awake in the morning. Fortunately, my parents are both night people too, so I didn’t get a lot of flac about this growing up.

92

I have always been a night owl. I’m pretty well convinced it’s genetic since both my Dad and sister were/are of the same species. My mother on the other hand is a morning bird. Up well before the crack of dawn. Even though she is 88 and I’m 45 she hasn’t ever understood that you just can’t change your species. I’ll never be a morning bird any easier then she’ll be a night owl. Furthermore, I don’t want to be! and may I point out, she doesn’t want to change either!

It’s 3:23am right now and I’m starting to get sleepy. I’ll probably go to bed soon and I won’t get up until noon or so if all goes well as I’m extremely cranky and feel like shit if I get up early.

Sure, I can (and do) get up when I have to. Yes, I’ve worked jobs where I had to get up at 5:00am. I’ve also worked graveyard shifts which was much better for me. But given the choice, my internal clock chooses staying up late and getting up late.

If any of you gain any great insite into why people feel like all the methods Esprix outlined in his OP are in some way supposed to help, I’d love to understand.

:smack:

93

actually, i think its a 'young" thing.
It may change when youa re older, Esprix.
I used to stay up til midnight-3 a.m.(Jenny Jones)
Then wake around 10ish.
My son even did this with me(a mistake; i conditioned him to be a night owl).
Once he started having to get up early for school(first grade) everything fell apart.
We now get up at 7(weekdays) and fall asleep at 10-11 p.m.
I miss staying up late, its so peaceful when most folk are asleep.

94

vanilla, how old do you think I am, sweetie? :wink:

Esprix

95

I should clarify this - this is only in regard to my friends, housemates, etc. Work is a different matter - not only do I have some time driving into work to wake up a bit and grind my gears into a “dealing with people” mode, but I would never snap at someone in the office. Indeed, I’m perfectly capable of waking up and being coherent and civil on a moment’s notice - I just don’t like doing it, and it’s not my natural state of being. So if I wake up on a Saturday and jkusters says, “Good morning,” I grunt at him - he knows this, we’re fine with it. If I wake up on a Saturday and the chew toy says, “Oh my God, you’re such a SLEEPYHEAD!” he gets shoved out of bed and I step on him with spiked soccer shoes. (OK, maybe not, but he at least gets whacked with a pillow - well, would, if I had the energy or inclination.) But if I wake up on a Monday, shower, dress, head into work, and my co-worker says, “Good morning,” I reply with a, “Good morning” of my own, thank you very much. It’s only after I get to my desk that I secretly contemplate how to amass much wealth so I’ll never, ever have to go into work again.

Just to clarify. :wink:

Esprix

96

Because it doesn’t wake me up. :slight_smile: When we finally have a decent-sized earthquake, you can bet I’ll sleep through it.

And I, in turn, being accepting of the differences between jkusters and myself, opt to give the best reply under the circumstances (which would be a grunt), or, dodging the issue entirely, don’t respond at all (and honestly sometimes I don’t hear him), instead of, oh, say, picking up the dining room chair and smashing it over his head - repeatedly! - until he JUST SHUTS UP. {ahem} You get my meaning. :wink:

The one time I was allowed to be woken up and didn’t spaz was the terrorist attacks.

Eh, that’s just because thomasm keeps shushing me! I mean, we all know how hard it is to get me to speak up to be heard around the house… :wink:

Esprix

97

I hear ya. Us blue-eyed boys are pained by bright sunlight. No one seems to believe me, even when my eyes water.

Esprix

98

Well, if it’s co-workers, I’d say they need to be a little more civil - glaring at people doesn’t make for a happy work environment. In general, I’d say if you can accept that they aren’t morning people, they should accept that you are. If you want to be respectful, please feel free to say a curt, quiet good morning, but if you do it all perky-like, or try to turn it into the opening of a conversation… well, I, for one, find that irritating, especially if you already know I’m not a morning person. But I won’t glare or snap at you, I promise. I may avoid you, however. You should hang out with those other morning people. :stuck_out_tongue:

Esprix

99

Boy, some of you folks are cranky.

Maybe you’re sleepy.

Esprix, I’m curious; Have you ever had a fire alarm and slept through it? I’ve always wondered if really sound sleepers are at risk if their fire alarms aren’t loud enough.

100

RickJay I’m a really heavy sleeper when I sleep. But I find I do not sleep through stuff like fire alarms and whatnot. I do sleep heavily but anything out of the normal wakes me up and I get moving. IE: Fire alarms, ambulances that stick around, people that were not there when I was awake wandering in when I’m asleep.

If I do not expect it as part of where I am, and the surroundings I went to sleep in. I generally wake up to it. If it is expected in someway I generally don’t. Like when I lived in a small town and every few nights the trains would go by and blow their whistles which you could hear, even though they were across town.