I believe that Impossible Sausage it contains less fat, saturated fat and 0 cholesterol than regular sausage. Sure sounds less heart clogging to me. Until you mix it with biscuits and gravy that is.
It’s the first step toward the whiners catching teh gay.
Maybe someone on 4chan started the rumor that Impossible Sausage was made from aborted fetuses.
I want to believe some of them are just trolling.
It’s not as if there is anything wrong with a plant-based breakfast, I mean people are free to enjoy a bowl of oatmeal or cornflakes in their own homes. The problem comes when they start forcing their meals down our throats like they were the same as the breakfast my grandfather fought for in WW2.
Nobody is doing that. It’s just an option added to the menu. The regular, murdered meat is still the default.
But, but…our children will see people eating Impossible Sausage. In public. Right out in front of God and everybody. Then they’ll start thinking it’s ok to sample a different sausage every now and then. That way lays Madness and Communism. And The Ghey, of course.
Compared to “the leading regular pork sausage” anyway, which is a heck of a conditional. There’s almost certainly some sort of pork sausage out there that has less saturated fat and definitely less sodium than this one.
At any rate, plant based meat-alternatives aren’t meant or designed to be healthier or less heart clogging (they often but not always have less saturated fat than ‘regular’ meat but often have more fat than lean meat). All while being heavily processed with tons of fillers. And more sodium than animal protein because salt helps with the flavor.
They’re specifically marketed as being more sustainable and lower environmental impact, not better health-wise. Though, understandably, they hint at health benefits even if they can’t directly say as much to take advantage of the association people have between plants and general health.
Yum yum!
Can you imagine if your child starts to believe that vegetarian meals are as legitimate as traditional meat based ones? He may start experimenting with Impossible Sausage and before you know it he will be serving tofu in public.
I’m unsurprised that conservatives are obsessed with sausages. Deep down, they want an impossible one deep down!
Vegan rhymes with Reagan. That cannot be a coincidence.
If it is allowed in the kitchen somebody might try to sneak it onto the plate of an upright, God-fearing American.
In Vogon poetry, sure.
My grandfather fought in WW2 also, but he died many years ago so I can’t ask him which sausage he fought for.
My dad sure as hell didn’t fight for turkey sausage. 
Seriously dad would not have had turkey sausage on his plate while he was alive, pretty sure he’d be against Impossible Sausage as well.
Dad ran a greasy spoon restaurant in his final years with deep fried food and donuts. Like a true American.
Mandates. Socialist mandates.
And, speaking of “man dates”
(edit mine)
I think I sense a theme here…
There’s the problem – the risk that vegetarian sausage might be healthier. This is the reason that all countries with socialist universal health care have banned meat – as every conservative knows – in order to reduce health care costs. The Impossible Sausage is therefore the first step by the Deep State to lay the groundwork for UHC. Healthier people do not, however, live longer in countries with UHC, because once they reach 70 the Death Panels come for them. The result is a wonderfully cost-effective health care system, all run by the DMV. And it all starts with the Impossible Sausage and the Impossible Burger, and pretty soon (as Ronald Reagan once said, in speaking about the proposal to establish Medicare) “you and I are going to spend our sunset years telling our children, and our children’s children, what it once was like in America when men were free [and health care was not]”.
Elsewhere I mused that despite pronouns being a completely normal part of speech that every English speaker has used without thought for centuries they are now induce a deranged response to a certain subset of conservatives. Now we can add meat substitutes to this list. I wonder what other totally mundane concepts we can get associated with LGBTQ culture or “wokeness” and thus cause these people to reject. My suggestion is bathing and/or hygiene.
I don’t remember any furor over Burger King introducing an Impossible Whopper, and they’re bigger than Cracker Barrel. It’s weird.