So, I realized at 9:30 tonight that I forgot to pick up the books I need for my students tomorrow. I checked the hours of the local Barnes & Noble, and saw that they’re open until 10:00. Great! It’s 5 minutes from here, I’ll just head over and pick up what I need.
I got there at 9:37, and quickly found what I needed. I went to the cashier, enrolled myself in the teacher discount program, and paid the $64 for the three books I needed. Everything is awesome at this point.
And then I walked away from the counter.
A white male, shorter than my 6 feet and older than my 27 years came up and grabbed my shoulder from behind. I spun around and looked at him; I started to ask what the fuck was going on, but he started first:
“I saw your shirt. Have you heard of Chem Trails?”
I’m wearing a green t-shirt right now. The front says, “One Less Car. Keep Banff Green.” The back says, “Bikes… The Link to Green!” and has a picture of a bicycle chain and a picture of a car, circled with a slash through it (the “no” sign).
Because of the shirt I’m wearing, and because I heard, “…shirt. Have you heard of … trails?”, I think he’s talking about mountain biking. I don’t think this is illogical, and I still am finding his behavior rude. I just quickly said no, I’d look it up, and started to walk away.
Tinfoil Asshole grabs me again, and starts in on a spiel about how the government has modified 757s and 767s and they’re flying lower and he’s looked with his binoculars and it’s the Chinese or the Russians working with our government and mind control and Illuminati and don’t I see the CARS aren’t the problem, it’s the wasted JET FUEL?!
I told him, “You know what? I have heard about this. On NPR. They were debunking it.” He then started yelling about me closing my mind off and haven’t I noticed the different flight patterns in Gilbert in the past 10 years?
I answered that last question. “I’ve only lived here a year. I’ve most of my life within two miles of an Air Force base (Selfridge ANGB in Michigan). I’m sure whatever chemicals they’re spraying, I’ve gotten a higher dose than you anyways. Plus didn’t the airport in Gilbert change three years ago from Air Force to passenger service? Maybe that changed the flight patterns.”
He rambled some more, and I told him, “Hey, ya know what? I’ll look it up when I get home.” (I did, both through the SDMB and Google; that’s some Grade-A crazy, right there). He got angry and yelled as I was walking out the door, “Yeah, well, our money all says “New World Order” on it in Latin! Think about that!” I wanted to go back in and either A) remove this crazy asshole from this planet, or B) point out his shitty, fallacious, ad-hominem-filled debate tactics. Instead, I walked out to my car, got in, opened my wallet, and took out the $5 and $20 bills I have in there.
There is no Latin on either one.