Critters vs. Tremors: battle of the low-rent comedy/horror franchises

On the one hand, the Crites, a.k.a. Critters. Cheap Gremlins ripoffs with hedgehog overtones.

On the other hand, the Graboids, something like a cross between the shark from Jaws and the gopher from Caddyshack.

The battlefield: one small town in the middle of nowhere, USA.

Assume just a few Graboids, and a whole mess of Crites.

Who wins? Or do we all lose?

Mark 1 Grab-iods or Mark 2? It would definately make a difference in tactics.

In the end, everybody except the lead and the ingenue are toast. The sidekick might survive, but it’s 50/50 these days. Is the director going for drama, or a sequel. Then the Evil Thingies party all night on our bones. :smiley:

What about the paranoid survivalist (Michael Gross) or the no-nonsense sheriff (Barry Corbin)? I think they’ll make it.

But the greedy town drunks are toast.

Hobgoblins for the win!

Or Ghoulies!

Graboids by a mile.

After all the Ghoulies don’t have Reba as a pistol packing mama.

I gotta go with the Crites. As soon as one of the graboids pops out, the crites strip the thing down to bones. The graboids may get a few crites, but the land piranhas take the win.

I must confess I’ve only seen Tremors, and none of the sequels or TV series (and only Critters 1 and 2). So hell if I know.

Official thread starter ruling (take that for what it’s worth!): Ghoulies and Hobgoblins are a sideshow attraction, fighting each other for crumbs while the main event goes on in the middle of elsewhere.

You do realize that the Graboids know exactly where each and every Critter on the ground is don’t you?

Yeah, but there are only so many they can get in one bite, correct? It’s been a while since I’ve seen either movie, but the critters are high powered eating machines. Give them an opening and you’re a skeleton quick.

I gotta go with Harborwolf on this one. Calling the Crites “land piranhas” was spot on. They’d overwhelm a Graboid, being more numerous and more mobile.

Plus, the Crites can form into the large communal hive-ball and skeletonize anything they roll over in such a state. So they combine the power of the large, powerful entity with the power of the many small mean little entities.

Plus, aren’t they more intelligent than Graboids? Or are Graboids smarter than the first movie would have me believe?