Am I the only person on this site who doesn’t own a cat and was alive when Star Wars came out!
jeez.
Sorry I didn’t welcome you earlier, Crunchy, but my puter decided to go psycho on me. It just didn’t want me to talk to all of y’all. Anyway, here goes. I’m a 27 year old 7th grade Reading teacher near Tampa, FL. I’m engaged to the sweetest man alive, and enjoy sports (the Noles, Braves, and Bucs). As a result of my profession, I’m extremely jaded and cynical, so go ahead and bite me, assclown.
PS–you’ll probably be scared by my pic, but I’ll send it anyway
Crunchy Frog, I still do go to work but I have used the " I’ve got an appointment/class/briefing after lunch, so I’ll be gone for the rest of the day." excuse to hit the beach a little earlier. I’m a 3C0x1 and work in a commcenter. I pretty much send and receive all the classified message traffic for the base. Barring any unforseen incidences in the next three weeks, I’ll leave as an E-4. Do you expect me to believe that you worked in a classified building and didn’t use the “I’d tell you but I’d have to kill you” line at least once. Chicks dig it.
No, you’re not.
Cats and Chewbacca can bite me.
Hey, Crunchy! I’m new, 15, and from Australia - Perth, to be exact. I have no job, I’m a cheerleader, and on a scholorship program for Maths and Science. I love Buffy and Angel, “alternative” music, and am unfortunately underage, so biting you is probably prohibited - sorry. 
PicklePea
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I DON’T CARE!!! The next newbie to mention mustard (or any other condiment) gets flamed! What the hell people?! One person says something, then you all latch on and follow like a bunch of velcro sheep. Let’s try to have an original thought, ok?
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Who else has been stalked by a goose?
I’m not taking you to dinner without a nude pic.
I hope Cleo and Satan are very happy together.
donnie rotten
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Yet you still posted here because…?
See this is why you have such a low post count. I post any damn fool thing that pops in my head, which is why my post count is over 3000. If you can’t join 'em with quality, beat’em senseless with quantity.
gadgetgirl
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Ah, so you’re a trouble maker! FYI, I’m 27 (turning 28 June 1st - it’s just around the corner people, have you bought your presents for me yet? Here’s a hint - I have a PS2, but not many games for it. I also like to watch DVDs. Thankyouverymuch) As I was saying, I’m 27, which puts me at about 4 years old when Star Wars was originally released and although I don’t own a cat per se, I’m watching my sister’s cats for the summer.
Home of the Braves <— this is the person who had the audacity to email me with pics of herself and <gasp> a Brave!
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That’s not all that’s psycho, I see. First you’re a Braves fan, which just irritates the hell out of me. (As a Cardinal fan, I’m still bitter about the 1996 sweep during the NLCS.) The only Brave who I don’t consider as inherently evil and destined to burn in the pits of hell is Greg Maddux, who is just too damn good to hate, even if he is a Brave.
Second of all, you seem to have the purpose of the thread backwards. I welcome you, Understand?
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And so not only am I mad at you for polluting my box with a pic of Klesko, I now hold a grudge against your computer for changing its mind.
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For those who may be wondering, yes, she sent pics, no they weren’t nekked.
brewha
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Actually, we preferred the line “I’d tell you, but then I’d have to cut off your head and put it in a safe.”
Living Dead Girl
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Hey, I’m an American babe, I don’t know shit about other countries. Getting exact by saying your from Perth still leaves me wondering where in the hell is Perth in Australia? That’s like walking up to me and saying you’re from the Nebular-Q34 Galaxy - Planet Xaderlin to be exact.
Ok, that wraps it up for now. I probably will be gone the rest of the week. (I’m on vacation and currently using my parents’ computer and this thing is SLOOWWW!!)
So don’t let my lack of prompt welcoming stop you from posting here.
And where the hell is my help from the other regs?!
Enough details for a proper welcoming:
I’ve recently moved to Austin, TX. I am so frugal my first car out of college is a Corolla CE (that stands for Cheap Edition). Not only am I posting from work, but I played several games of pingpong prior to posting.
I’ve lurked for quite a while and am now posting with the goals of sharpening my wit, and getting advice from total strangers who couldn’t care less about how to improve my life.
My timing also leaves something to be desired.
See, I’m not the only one stalked by a goose! :rolleyes:
Crunchy: Perth is on the Western side… y’know, the part everyone avoids. If they’re smart, anyway.
hey, i know my brother posted a thread for my welcome but i decided to post here and let myself be known! I’m Soccerbaby, a 16 year old female who loves to talk and flirt. I’m a sophomore in high school and planning on going to college. My brother is Airman Doors, USAF and he’s a great guy he got me into the board!! Anyways, Hello to everyone and talk to you later! Caio! A special Hey to Crunchy (he said hi to me on my thread!) 
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
:::stomp clomp STOMP THUD:::
GRRRROOOOWWWRRRRFFF!!!
Thus enters the Monstre…
Something about me? Okay, let me explain. No, there is too much, let me sum up.
- Programmer
- Musician (piano, guitar)
- Hi, Opal!
- hungry…
the Monstre <— hoping that there is no Mock Frog served here, and wondering where to get a Ram’s Bladder Cup.
Crunchy, when you are looking at a map of Australia, Sydney is on the lower right-hand side and Perth is on the upper left-hand side.
As you can see, he has lots of fool things in his head.
Doin’ the touchy-feely welcomes in all the other welcome threads! (I told you I don’t know how to be the sarcastic assclown you embody so well! I prefer being the sweet superflirt. We all have our crosses to bear.)
C’mon, welcome me, dammit!
Where are ya, Frog-boy?
:::in Monty Python old woman voice::: Do your worst!!
I am a newbie, too.
I tried another name and it wouldn’t let me post no matter what I did. This name, however, it liked. so this name I shall be.
me: psuedo-architect by day, mad cap illustrator by night. Used to be a taste tester for the ajax corp. until a misfortunate accident (of which seedy details will go untold) forced an untimely retirement.
I’m a Gen X baby born a under a some what lucky star to a Pygmy sherpa and a hoola girl in the arid climate that can be Texas.
I aspire to greatness: I long to be the premier slumlord (lady?) of the South (because the roaches are big here and would make my job all that MORE joyous!).
I love to read the straight dope so that when co-workers spread hopelessly incorrect ‘facts’,
I can say “uhhhh, nope. the straight dope is…”
and adding a smug
“uh huh.”
that is all I can say for now.
oh,
and that I hope I haven’t worn out my welcome…yet.
<fin>
p.s. mr. crunchyfrog.
I tried my best to abide by rule number 6. but I SWEAR it wouldn’t mail correctly. you know, that mailer damon thing…I SWEAR!!! I would never ever lie.
make that rule number 7.
Crap, I didn’t check in before I started posting.
I’ve worked both in politics and broadcast media. Sorry about the state of political discourse since the mid-90’s, it is all my fault.
Currently I am a caddy at a miniature golf course. Yeah, the pay isn’t so good, but club selection is easy and the tips are excellent. Those Chuck E. Cheese tokens add up after a while.
And who are you to judge me anyway, Crunchy, “…You vacuous, toffee-nosed, malodorous pervert.”
Glad to be on board, guys.
Lemon curry?
Ikujinashi says:
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To borrow a line from the last Welcome Wagon: Is that your username, or did you drop your mouse on the keyboard? As for your post, don’t feel bad, for the longest time, I drove a Pontiac Shitcan. It didn’t look like much, but at least the gas mileage sucked. Got to keep OPEC thriving, you know. I was doin’ my part!
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**And we’ll start with this piece of advice: You should always floss before… aw screw it, I don’t care.
The aptly named The Boring Guy
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mm-hmm. Really? You don’t say? And then what?
Monstre
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You don’t start all your posts like this, do you?
Thanks for adding to the confusion factor around here. As you may or may not know, we already have a monster and a Monster104. Now if you can talk a friend into signing up as Monstre104, we’d really hate you, instead of the mild annoyance which is currently felt. 
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Well, youngster, had you bothered to read the thread, you would have noticed that I announced a while ago that I was on vacation and would not be posting for a while.
Bad News Baboon
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No shit. I’d have never guessed. :rolleyes:
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Does this mean you design psuedo buildings where psuedo people can go to their psuedo jobs and earn a psuedo living?
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Ajax? I use that shit to clean my tub! You mean we’re supposed to eat that?!
Jesse Custer
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Eh. I’ve had worse jobs. I used to work at the zoo with a program to try to get endangered speicies to procreate. You ever have to try to artifically inseminate a female lowland gorilla with a turkey baster dressed as an ape? It’s not easy, let me tell you.
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I dunno… Tim Curry? Is that how we play this game? What’s going on here?
Sorry to be so arcane, Crunchy. “Lemon curry?” was one of those incongruent tag lines at the end of a Python episode.