Dating an older woman.

Are there any pitfalls or minefields I should be aware of? I’ve noticed a 50-year-old woman who volunteers for the same organization I do has started to find reasons to be where I am. This is not unwelcome; in fact, I’m kind of excited about it. So far, she’s intelligent, well spoken, warm, and (I gotta admit) damn well preserved. She could pass for 40. Let me be clear: I do not think 50 is “old,”; I’m 41, going on 42, and this gap doesn’t mean much to me. However, in chronological terms she’d be the oldest woman I’d ever gotten involved with. I’m wondering what that might mean, if anything.
Honestly, I’m a little bit intimidated. She has multiple Master’s Degrees, owns a house, drives a MUCH nicer car than I do (though our incomes are not far apart, she makes a bit more than me) and in general I would think she was out of my league if I still believed in that concept. None of these will put me off, but they do stick out to me.

Yeah, given the ages, I don’t think there’s enough of an age gap that warrants any cultural differences.

If she likes you, keep doing what you’re doing.

My 40yo brother married his 49yo wife last July.

What was the question?

Apparently I’ve found a topic no one cares about! :stuck_out_tongue:

In the grand scheme of things, 9 years isn’t very much, and the further you get into adulthood the less often it seems to come up.

If you have things in common and like each other, go for it.

On a less romantic and more practical (and possibly even a bit morbid) note, women tend to outlive men anyway, so maybe she’s hedging her own bets by aiming for a younger man who is more likely to have a nearer contemporary death/dissolution period to her in the future.

That and with more women having successful careers, women dating under their tax bracket (and age) is a thing now.

Oh, a fifty-year-old woman? Yeah, I got involved with one of those once: I was thirty, myself, at the time — quite the age difference. We recently celebrated our silver wedding anniversary.

We’ve had our problems, over the years, but the age gap’s been one of the most trivial, in all honesty. Follow your heart. Or, you know, whichever organ seems appropriate.

I am 54 and my Gentleman Friend (cuz we are too grown to be talking about Boyfriends/Girlfriends) is 48, and things are just fine with me being his Lady Friend. But then again, he says he has always liked older women, said he had a thing with a 52 year old woman when he was in college, so, whatevah.

I had a thing with a 48 year old woman when I was 30. No problems whatsoever. There were more problems when I was 40 and going with a 24 year old.

It’s funny, an 8-9 year age difference is an issue when it’s the woman who is older but no one bats an eyelash to such an age difference when it’s the man who is older.

I just found out that I am in the same situation (she initially lied to me about her age by many years but I didn’t even care by that point). She is very wealthy, gorgeous and looks the same age as me if not younger. She just has some freaky genes like her 70 year old mother that could easily pass for 50.

To be honest, I found it to be quite a turn-on. I had a thing for older women when I was younger and I thought those days were over but I haven’t seen someone almost 50 that attractive and younger looking outside of Hollywood. Sign me up.

The reason she lied to me (and everyone else) initially was that she doesn’t like the types of men in their 50’s and 60’s that kept hitting on her. She wanted someone closer to 40 so she has me now. I can certainly understand that. I don’t want to get into too many details but she also has “skills” that I have never seen outside of certain websites.

I don’t really see a downside to it. I don’t think she would have gone out with me if we were the same age but my relative youth is a primary selling point for her.

Yes, this is a bigger problem. My Gentleman Friend has a buddy who is also late 40s, and he won’t leave the 20-somethings alone, yet he gripes constantly to my Guy about how silly these girls are. My Guy keeps telling him, go older, and all that silliness and drama will be much less. But his friend wants arm candy.

Ugh! Not more of this.

O.P. date your older woman and have a good time.

The only issue I can see is that, if you might eventually want to have children, she’s probably post-menopausal. But if that’s not an issue for you, and you’re both happy with each other, then it’s no different from any other two adults.

I’d have to know her hair colour, ethnicity and occupation before I could answer.

when I was 25 I married my 37 year old girlfriend - we’re still happy to this day.

When it fits, you don’t quit.

She sounds great! Go for it and have fun!

it’ll happen more often as you get older.:smiley:


Like nun-chuk skills, bow-hunting skills, computer hacking skills?