This question is primarily aimed at the female dopers out there but anyone can feel free to join in!
Is this taboo really as wide spread as I’m lead to believe it is? I may have recently stumbled into this situation and I’m getting mixed opinions as to just how taboo the situation is.
If you have any questions feel free to ask away and I’ll be happy to answer. Thanks in advance!
My Dad married his ex-girlfriend’s friend. She introduced them. I don’t see why it should be taboo but some ex-girlfriends would be upset about it depending on the circumstances of the break-up. My ex-wife has some really cute friends but they’re either taken or psycho but if they weren’t I’d have no problem with it.
Dude —
That’s their problem - It’s got nothing to do with you. They have to work it out between themselves, and, unless there’s jello involved, you need to stay out of it.
The Doctor
I guess it mostly depends on how amicable the break-up was. If you’re still on friendly terms with the ex, it shouldn’t be a problem. If you can’t be in the same room with eachother with a knife fight breaking out, then by dating her friend, you’re pretty much forcing them to end their friendship, which, depending on the specific circumstances, could be seen as kinda fucked up. I don’t think this is a “one-size-fits-all” situation. It’s going to vary wildly depending on the people involved and how they relate to each other.
I guess I should elaborate a bit more.
Friend will be moving in with Ex in a few weeks for a year or so. And although the break up was a little rough, in the sense that she really wasn’t the one that did the breaking up, we have been able to hang out and talk with each other in the year since the breakup. The thought of friend and I together, however, is apparently changing her mind on the whole talking/being amicable thing.
Ah, ok - with this new information in mind, I’m going to give you the best advice you’ve ever gotten in your entire life:
RUN. AWAY.
There are plenty of hot, talented, intelligent girls out there who want to massage your feet with their boobies who meet the basic criteria of NOT LIVING WITH YOUR EX-GIRLFRIEND.
You are headed for a world of hurt. And judging from you starting this thread, you’re starting to realize it. Get out while the gettin’ is good.
That is all. The Doctor
I would think that it would depend on how close the girls are. If they are not that close then it may be ok.
But if they are like sisters, the friend probably would not date you anyway because she would have been the one that your ex came to during your relationship with all the problems (percieved or real) that she had with you.
Among my closest circle of girlfriends we have a rule "No messing with the boyfriend, ex, or the crush (if it is a serious crush, not my “flavor of the months”)
I dunno! Back in high school, a guy and I almost dated. We definately had serious crushes on each other, but nothing ever came of it. My sister thought he was a dork at the time. He’s my brother-in-law now. Who knew? 
OP situation, I’d say avoid it like the plague if you can help it. It doesn’t sound like anything good can come of it, at least not right now. Maybe the ex still has some pain she needs to get through before she can accept a relationship between you and her friend.
But, I’ve seen it work out just fine with people who split up amiably for mutual reasons, but the friend is just too perfect a match to ignore. If this is more than a crush for you, don’t burn your bridges just yet, but proceed with caution. There’s a reason you shouldn’t be in the intersection when the “Do not walk” light is flashing, and you’re likely to get splattered if you’re not careful! 
Good luck.
Huh? It’s not taboo, it’s open season. It’s word-of-mouth advertising and a great reason to be civil during a break up. Any problem is between the girl and her friend, not between girl and you.
You will be getting bad press every time she goes home. After a while, it will have an effect.
But if you could somehow involve Jello…
I was on the fence till you mentioned they were going to be living together for a year.
I second the good doctor’s advice…RUN. AWAY!
Seriously, are you trying to torture your ex? Because it could only end up being highly uncomforatable for all parties involved. You sleep over there and you risk running into the ex in your skivvies on the way to the bathroom. You guys stay at your place and the ex has to know exactly where her roomie/friend is, see her come home in the morning, ect.
In sum: not living together? Maybe. Living together? Hell no.
How much for you to write me a prescription for that?
BWAHAHAHAHA!!!
Any problem between you and Friend will eventually be discussed with Ex.
Any problem between you and Ex will eventually be discusssed with Friend.
Any problem between Ex and Friend will eventually be discussed with you.
If there are no problems in the you-Ex-Friend universe, there will be soon.
I would have said yes before I knew they were living together, now I’ll have to say hell yes. Sounds like a one way ticket to Threesomeville, population: You, new girl and ex.
Well… if you also move in with Friend’s ex, you’ll have a decent pitch for a sitcom.