DAVEW0071 said in the “Does Guinness Expire?” thread:
The time he posted this? 8/5/2000, 10:27am.
Just HOURS before the death of Sir Alec Guinness.
Now, I’ve caused injury - Gerald Ford’s recent stroke. And Baglady has successfully caused death - Jimmy Stewart - but it took a couple of days.
The sheer imensity of Dave’s powers are amazing. I bow down before him and I suggest you join me.
Baglady killed Jimmy Stewart? Did I miss something? Yoinks.
The Dave/Sir Alec Guiness thing doesn’t surprise me, though. Not one bit. 
Hmmmm… perhaps I ought to contact Dave. I could hire him to mention a few people…
Hmm, I don’t think it was a power of his will. After all, he was announcing his respect and sadness that Guiness would not be with us much longer.
DAVEW0071 is cursed! Think about it: he’s a Bills fan too!
Coincidence? I think not…
Baglady, a couple of days before his death, said “isn’t Jimmy Stewart dead?” He soon was.
When I heard that Gerald Ford was in the hospital with an ear infection I said “imagine the jokes if it turns out he fell down. But then if he had fallen down he would probably say it was a stroke before he admitted it.” Hours later he was readmitted for having a stroke. They say now that it was a stroke from the very beginning, but can we really discount my role?
Hm. You make good points, obfusciatrist.
You and Baglady are very recently married, right? You did discuss these powers the two of you seem to have before the wedding, right? And you guys are okay with this?
I always thought there was something a little shady about DaveW0071 … something that you couldn’t quite put your finger on.
Thanks for killing Obi Wan, Dave. Why couldn’t you have taken out Jar-Jar or Anakin?
Yeah, kill someone we don’t like! Not OBI WAN!
Jerk.
Persephone perceived: “You and Baglady are very recently married, right? You did discuss these powers the two of you seem to have before the wedding, right?”
“Wondertwins powers, activate! Shape of an inflatable porta-potty! Form of… form of… aww sh*t, I can’t think of anything!”
POOF!!
Surgoshan said, “Yeah, kill someone we don’t like! Not OBI WAN!”
Jar-Jar Binks?
Isn’t Jesse Helms dead?
Dave, my sincere apology for sucker-punching you in the bar fight. It was an accident man, really. Let me buy the next round.
AHEM! I think I made it very clear in the other thread that Baglady did not kill Jimmy Stewart, at least, not on her own–I HELPED!!
all i can say is…
you bastard!!!
Wow, sounds like a lot of people were trying to kill Jimmy Stewart. Who knew he was so despised?
But I am taking sole responsibility for Ford’s stroke (unless the Secret Service is reading this, in which case it was evilbeth).
The CIA is probably relieved to hear you claim responsibilty. Now they don’t have to do any extra work to cover their asses.
Hey, don’t drag me into this Ford thing! I was busy plotting the deaths of all my people on my Celebrity Death Race 2000 ballot! Wait, that’s cheating…um, actually I was working on the Pepsi girl!
I predict that Kenny will die in the next episode of South Park.
I’m not just expressing a thought, here. I am downright telling you it will happen.
Who has the power now?
Alec Guinness, dead? And where was Dennis Price when this happened, eh?
No, but he doesn’t look at all well. He’s an elderly gent, isn’t he? Certainly would be a shame if old Jesse keeled over, deader’n a doornail, ready to push up the daisies.
{I got the power, I got the power, I got the power…}
Strom Thurmond, too.
I would have said ‘David Prowse’, but then you were going for a different effect.