Dear Agony Auntie.. what the hell am I to do?

My mom gets on my nerves so much.
There are three problems

#1 living in the same house
#2 she doesnt hear well
#3 I was mental than she went nuts

#1 is the usual teenage thing. I dont really mind it. Almost every 18 year old has that problem. I try to stay in my room as much as I can. That reduces the quarrel rate tremendously.

#2 So mom doesnt hear well. The thing is she will not tell you when she doesnt understand what I am saying but just mutter yes or nod to pretend she understands perfectly well. That often leads to fights.

e.g. today while lunch.
I ask her to please put no food on my plate yet cause I d like to eat some salad before. She nods and matters yes and in the next instant puts stuff on my plate. I roll my eyes and she starts to yell at me a la you brat, you should learn to behave, wicked girl! yuk. Thank goodness dad was there - bad thing was that he started yelling too “show a bit tolerance!” which started a mature fight which mom ended with “now shut the fuck up.” which translates to: I am a poor woman who doesnt hear well and therefor I can do no wrong. Grrrrr.

#3 easy. I went mental - which is hard for a mom to take. Why does my kid have a mental desease or two? Is it my fault? Now she seems to take it as something I did to insult her. I went mad on purpose so to say. :rolleyes:
Now she is going mad too. She had the hell of a bad childhood and since I started to see a shrink she seems to have been thinking about it more often. (claiming she has no problem with it…) To me she seems more and more strange. Irritable and stuff.
Somehow it is my fault, but than I didnt take the decission to get depression and panic attacks, did I?

I hope I will never have children. My mom is a good mom, and I d probably be worse than her in that job. And she is giving me enough trouble already…


ranting does me good.

Dude… I can only say I’m sorry!

All I can say is what I have learned from personal experience, and YMMV…

Life is like a good horror movie; scary as hell, but worth the price of admission.

It will get better, soon! You’re 18, and soon will be moving out and getting a life of your own. Look foreward to that time, and the things that are happening to you now WILL seem humorous in a few years! Trust me, it’s true.

I’m 35 now, and life is great… gets better every day! But I was 18 once… and I know, from personal experience, how much it sucks (and what the barrel of a gun tastes like! I thank God I didn’t do it…)!

Hang on! If you keep your head, things will get better.

Hi Born Dodgy.

First of all, you’re fine. I just thought you might need to hear someone say it. You are one of my favourite SD posters! You are obviously a very talented graphic designer, your website is fun, you have a good sense of humour, your English is excellent, and you are making good progress in trying to get a job (possiby here in England, nearer your Significant Other). So things could be worse! Oh, and juding by your photo on the People Pages you’re kind of cute too. (This is a sincere compliment, not a whacko stalker kind of thing. I’m a very old person compared to you, and I have a very nice girlfriend of my own. Just thought I’d set your mind at rest).

Life at home at 18 often sucks. Life isn’t picking on you - that’s how it is for most people your age, most of the time. Keep your cool, and keep focussed.

You have medium- and long-term dreams, goals and ambitions - just keep your eye on these, and don’t let day-to-day irritations get on top of you.

Whatever friends and acquaintences you have, and people who share your interests and ambitions, these are your support group. Use them, call them, stick with them. Don’t bottle up how you feel. Talk things over with your friends. It always helps to talk.

It’s hard, but try to cut your folks some slack. They gave you life, and life is wonderful. I promise you they don’t mean for anything except to love you and want the best for you. I know it doesn’t often feel that way, but it’s true. Your Mom doesn’t want to have a hearing problem, and perhaps she’s having difficulty coming to terms with it. And if you had some sort of illness, as you said, that might have been tough on her too. So, try to take the big position. The situation is tough on you, for sure, but perhaps it’s a two-way street, and sometimes tough on them as well.

If you can talk things over with your parents, without anyone losing their temper, then that will help. If you can’t, and that’s often the problem, then at least keep your own dignity in how you respect them, and treat them well. It feels better.

Just don’t get too intense about it. Chill, relax, bear it out. The good times come, and come a-plenty. Especially for someone as likeable, smart, cute, talented and funny as you. You have many times ahead of you when you will shine, and life will be brighter because of it. Look forard to those, and sleep easy.

Well, when you do eventually move out, you will look back at these kind of incidents and smile (I did).

So, just enjoy life; its too nasty by itself to make it worse by getting angry with your mom.

loved your alleentchen.wav. Have been waiting for more for a long time…The naked stuff was just too cheap!! (I confess, I fell for it…)