The first time I heard this song (years ago), I had a giggling fit the likes of which I hadn’t had since I stopped smoking pot years before. When it got to the “Please don’t tell… mommy beats me too” I honestly think I saw the tunnel of light and felt the silver cord tightening I was laughing so hard. There’s just nothing funnier than failed ultra-seriousness.
There is a worse song but unfortunately I don’t know it’s name or the exact lyrics. The “plot” is a little girl whose atheist drunken father kills her mother, then himself, while a stranger holds her behind a sofa. Later in Sunday school she sees the picture of Jesus and tells them “that’s the man who was with me that night”. Such friggin’ glurge, one that begs the question "why does Jesus look like a Western artist’s rendering made many centuries after he lived? Why didn’t Jesus do jack to stop daddy from killing mommy? Why didn’t… anyway, you get the drift.
Holy Christ, I agree with something you say that doesn’t involve me being a prick! :eek:
Has anyone seen these these kids in the hanging pants? Or the one’s driving the “bugfart” cars? Beatings are, sadly, underestimated.
As depressing as the song is, I have to say I like the message. Makes ya think. Beats the shit out of Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer..
On the other hand, anyone that actually lays a hand on a kid, I’d like a home address. You can e-mail me.
Humor is great when nobody is in immediate danger. And this is kinda funny taken in the context of the kid being harmed,
When it… aw fuck it. I know it happens. E-mail me. That’s a call to all of you. I have some bail money. :mad:
That’s “The Little Girl”, by country singer John Michael Montgomery. One of my favorite songs ever. It’s got such wonderful glurgy goodness coupled with a country twang! How can you lose?
Tuckerfan, I’m really enjoying that site (in a horrified fascination, point and laugh sort of way). Never would have found it if not for this thread. So for me, anyway, your suffering was worthwhile, Scylla.
There was a song popular a few years back. A country song about some kid dying. The hook was the line 'Who is going to hold your hand when you cross the streets in Heaven?".
Now, I don’t know about you, but in my idea of Heaven, little kids don’t get run over when crossing the street.
But does anyone remember the songs “Rocky” by Austin Roberts or “Run Joey Run” by David Geddes where the young woman dies at the end of each song? Pathetic!
“Run Joey Run” really made me want to puke. The whiny high pitched voice of Julie sounded more like that of a prepubescent boy than a teenaged girl. Then she gets blown away by her shotgun toating father.:rolleyes: Great music, Dave!
You may mock it, but I’ll never forget a version of that hymn taught to me by a devout Christian who was a proud member of our armed forces
Napalm sticks to little children
All the children of the world
Orange, yellow, blue and white
Screaming torches in the night
Napals sticks to all the children of the world.
I don’t know if you guys down south would have heard this, but Canadian singer Amy Sky does the glurgiest song I’ve ever heard (repeatedly, on Lite radio) - “I Will Take Care of You.” It doesn’t have Jesus in it, so it’s not as good as the previously mentioned ones, but it is a sickeningly sweet tear-jerker. I guess you could just add Jesus to it as you sing along.
And sometimes you can’t turn the radio off. Sometimes you have co-workers who force you to listen to Lite radio or country music.
That said, Sam Stone and DocCathode have just confirmed my seat in hell, for I am sitting at my desk sniggering. Especially the “beats them with a shoe” line.
