What’s on your car? Seen any good bumper stickers lately?
I have a single large decal of a praying mantis on my rear window. This was applied long before I became a single mom. Oh, the irony.
One of my favorites is:
“Jesus loves you. Everyone else thinks you’re an asshole.”
The car that got me through high school was festooned with bumperstickers, in true high school form. I had “You cannot simultaniously prevent and prepare for war,” “Guster is for Lovers” (a band) A sticker I got in the town I stayed in when I did my exchange program in Germany (Hameln. As in “The Pied Piper of…”) and many others that were not noteble enough to be remembered. And my favorite: “Millenium, schmillenium.” It was the best bumper sticker I ever owned. White with block purple lettering. The period was on the sticker. And this was about 2 years ago. I miss it.
Now the only sticker I have on my car is an “Andy LIVES!” Sticker with a Warhol-ish print of Andy Kaufman. I’ll have to see about getting another “Millenium, Schmillenium” sticker.
I swore I would never, ever have a bumper sticker on my beloved truck. 'Till about a month ago. Now, in small white letters on a black background, I have “Hug your kid. Spank the sound barrier.” It is positioned right beside my Veteran’s tags, so that folks might understand.
<Blatant thread hijack>
To hell with everybody with one of those “Peeing Calvin” window stickers! You might not be the reason for the decline of civility, but your not helping any!
</Blatant thread hijack>
Still my favorite bumpersticker–
“Keep Honking, I’m re-loading!”
“I found Jesus. He was hiding in the trunk.”
“I found Jesus. He was hiding in the trunk.”
I saw these three on one car:
My child licks himself clean.
My child eats bugs.
My child drinks from the toilet.
Each one had a picture of a dog or cat.
** Pray For More Slow New Days **
** If you don’t like morning traffic, please keep to the rest stops **
Gore vs. Bush 2000 ?
Where’s Perot when we NEED him?
Horn Broke - Watch for Finger
Get any closer and I’ll flick a booger on your windshield!
Jesus Saves. Moses Invests.
On a Mustang, backwards in the windshield: Slower Traffic Keep Right
I have a peeing Calvin on my back window. At least I was original enough to cut and paste so he is peeing on something that I don’t like!
Back off, I’m a postal worker. Seen in the postal employees parking lot!!
Jesus Saves, Takes Half Damage.
My honor student will be your kid’s lawyer.
Not on my car, but I like them.
This is great, I love this thread, it’s right up my alley.
Actual quotes are in quotes, descriptions are not.
[list]
[li]A blue bathroom door type sign with both a male and female facing each other. The male is holding a present and the female is holding a plant. The male is saying[/li]“Sweet Bush!”
and the female is saying
“Nice Package!”
[li]“Beer: helping UGLY people have SEX since 1063.”[/li]
[li]“Practice Random Violence and Senseless Acts of Cruelty.” I actually copyrighted this one.[/li]
[li]“I’m the delinquent who’s fucking your honor student”[/li]This one is funny to us because my girlfriend is an honor student, and I was(am?) a delinquent.
[li]“Your kid may be an honor student but you’re still a moron.”[/li]
[li]“Can’t sleep, clowns will eat me. Can’t sleep, clowns will eat me. Can’t sleep, clowns will eat me…”[/li]
[li]“I’m not a slut, I’m just popular.”[/li]
[li]A bony fish skeleton that is in the shape of a jesus fish.[/li]
[li]“Nice guys finish last… but isn’t that what most women want?”[/li]
[li]Don’t piss me off-I am running out of places to hide the bodies.[/li]
[li]spelled out of cut out ransom note letters: “i KnoW whEre yOu LIvE.”[/li]
[li]“People think I’m conceited. Can I help it if I’m always right.” This made me think of Alphagene-don’t know why.[/li]
[li]“Testosterone Fuel-Injected”[/li]
[li]“Get your pork at Jim’s Meats. Nobody beats Jim’s Meat!”[/li]
[li]“If you don’t turn down your bass, I will have to apply my bat to your skull.”[/li]
[li]“I may not be brilliant, bu I have great breasts!”[/li]
[li]“Zippit.”[/li]
[li]“If we don’t take care of the customer, maybe they’ll stop buging us.”[/li]
[li]Mediocrity: It’s a lot easier, and by the time anyone notices the difference, it’s too late anyway.[/li]
[li]“They don’t have Quake3 in France. It was too hard to write a ‘surrender’ option into the game.”[/li]
[li]“Damn, woman! I just gave you sweet lovin’ five minutes ago. What you tryin’ to do, kill me?”[/li]
[li]written like a FedEx logo: PornStar-when you absolutely, positively, have to get some tonight.[/li]
[li]“Pull up your pants, turn your hat around, put down the forty, and get a job.” I think I saw this one in the first 30 seconds of it being applied. I can’t imagine the guy lived much longer than that.[/li]I will try to remember some more, but for now I am tapped.
Imagine whirled peas
I Love Cats!
…tastes just like chicken.