Oh, don’t worry about frigtening me off. It takes alot to scare me. 
Really.
In true fashion, I was late getting to El Arroyo. I was short on cash and had to go to stop to get cash. I figured the rest of the gang weren’t going to leave without me since I was carrying all the tickets.
After I arrived, we went back to Chef’s house where we had a wild orgy until it was time to go back to the restaurant. Okay so that didn’t happen, but I’m sure that was what it was supposed to be. 
We did go back to Chef’s so Mrs. Chef could pick up a sweater. No need for Chef to worry about me stalking him. I was sitting in the middle seat of the mini-van and I kept turning around to talk to ExTank and Aglarond so I never saw the way to his house. Chef Jr. complained that we talk too much. ExTank and Ag looked in the rear of the minivan for the large Tupperware container to put him in (Chef came up with the idea).
I wowed Zyada with my ability to give accurate change when we collected money for valet parking. Unfortunately the lot was full so we had to drive around looking for a spot. We tried following an old couple but they just kept walking so Chef tore past them and zipped into a parking space.
We had free admittance tickets and after entering the fair, we bought tickets for food and rides. Ag hadn’t stopped at the ATM and I loaned me some cash. Apparently he missed the secret hand signal on how he was going to pay me back for the loan because he didn’t come over later that evening.
We discovered that Zyada was afraid of heights. We should’ve guessed it by the death hold she had on the door. We teased her about her grip keeping her safe if the cart broke loose and plummeted below. ExTank also pointed out the plastic ties holding the door closed.
I really can’t remember everything that happened. Everything gets kinda funny after the mug-o-wine. At some point we made it to El Arroyo where we caught up with JimB, SkySlash, Adam Yax (who’s a lot taller than I remember), Balance, and Palmyra.
I’ll post more later.
Give us time, Palmyra. Give us time. We can break you.
Onve again, I’d forgotten about Zyada’s apparent fear of heights. Her knuckes were about ready to bust through the skin. For future reference, if you’re ever going to be anywhere more than about 20 ft. off the ground with Zyada, I’d recommend you not be between her a a wall. This has been a public service announcement paid for by ‘Other Dopers Who Apparently Can’t Do Simple Math for Aglarond’.
don’t bet on it
You haven’t been to Hawkwood with these guys. Trust me. It’s enough to frighten even the Fairy Godfather there. Young men in kilts go running when they see us coming. Beer vendors are afraid they won’t have enough and that’s just for JimB. Be afraid. Be very afraid.
Happy birthday, Palmyra.
(I assume this is the thread to do that in.)
Oh, and Grace. I didn’t hop by your house because I didn’t want hubby to be jealous. I was also pretty disappointed that you only thought I was worth $20. 
I get more than twice that selling my body on the street to strangers. Sure, I’d give you a discount. But not that much.
OK. DFW Dopers have a new goal. Break Palmyra’s spirit.I can’t do it right now because I’m watching TV and checking this thread during commercials. But somebody who’s not lazy can try.
This is great. I just saw Mystery of Genius on A&E and now I’m watching the Man Show. High brow education and low brow humor all in the course of only 2 1/2 hours. Could life be any better?
I think I’d have to sample the product a little to judge it’s real value.
Come on by and I’ll leave the upstairs window unlocked. 
A BIG thank you to ExTank for picking up the tab last night. Not only is he generous but he’s also a thoughtful gentleman. When we were leaving the tent (after the Mug O’Wine) he stayed behind to make sure I didn’t slip in the mud. I think he was afraid I’d take out the little old lady in front of me.
YOU WILL NEVER BREAK ME!! NEVER!!
Seriously, it takes a helluva lot of crap to scare me off for good.
::daring voice::
Do your worst!
Oooohhh. New pick-up line.
“Wanna sample my product, baby?”
I like it.
Ha. Ha. Your daring voice does not scare me. I’ve survived two World War simulation games, Half Life and have leveled every foe in Quake I, II, and III. I can not be stopped.
Look, i’m a natural redhead. I can stand the five outer layers of hell before i blink.
She married me online. A nuke would run away scared. My combs keep dying because they can’t (literally) go through my hair.
If this doesn’t say something about her, I don’t know what does. She would have left a lone time ago . . . I know of two other people who have lasted the stuff she’s lasted with me.
I’ve survived two redheads. You don’t stand a chance.
Come to think of it, I’ve forgotten what started this little tangent and I’m too lazy to look back in the thread. If somebody would do me a favor and post a thread synopsis, it would be greatly appreciated by the sloth they call Aglarond.
you think you can break my spirit!! I will not be broken. I do the breaking!!
Grace, I meant to post this earlier when I mentioned the new pick-up line. These were generated by an automatic pickup line generater at http://www.ontap.com/pickup2/index.cgi
If my rod is unholy, will you eagerly hump it?
How about a vengeful encounter of the sucking kind?
You’re so sticky I’d slam your furry undercheek just to see what your keyster tastes like.
Caress me if I’m wrong, but don’t I know you?
Hey! Your ass isn’t so bad, but your breasts need work.
My pleasure scepter is approaching squeezing velocity.
What did the man-whore say to the little boy?
Girl, I’d like to bone-release your navel.
If God made anything more perverted than your tummy, I hope he kept it for his blender.
The cops think I have leprosy. Quick! Let me hide in your butt.
If I could rewrite the alphabet, I would put my eyes and your donuts together.
You make me want to want to tickle myself.
Screw me, gorgeous, I’m from Britain.
My forehead, your soul and a whole lotta exploring.
If God made anything more eccentric than your mind, I hope he kept it for his mother.
I’m consulting my eyes.
Let’s not beat around the bush! Your ass isn’t so bad, but your beaver needs work.
The cops think I have a fever. Quick! Let me hide in your throat.
Would you like to dance, or should I go slam myself?
Just close your toes and pretend you’re humping my horsey.
Do you have a sister who isn’t so much like you?
Come on, child, don’t hate me for holding your cheeks.
You make me want to burn.
There’s so much more to me than my powermeat.
What did the senator say to the little boy?
I’m a pimply powermeat of burnin’ transvestite.
Are your arms tired? Because they’ve been running through my mind all day.
Don’t be a midget, madam, I’d like to hump your crack.
How about a shining encounter of the massaging kind?
Hump me if I’m wrong, but don’t I know you?
So, what kind of chances do I have with these?
And don’t anybody think they can break me. My FPS skills speak for themselves.
Damn, guy, no wonder you post all these threads about striking out. You need some serious coaching. I’m obviously not the one to do that, but I can tell you do need some help.
Jim