Here’s a conversation that a friend of mine told me about. She had to make a phone call, here’s how it went.
friend: Is Dick there ?
receptionist: We have two Dicks.
friend: Oh, I’m looking for Dick Lovet (Yep, Love it)
receptionist: That Dick isn’t in, the other Dick is available.
friend: I’ll try to get Dick another time.
receptionist: That dick is very hard to get hold of.
My friend had to hang up the phone at that point, she could control her laughter anymore.
In other words, she didn’t have dick.
That is a classic!!
Reminds me of when I was working in a publishing company that had so many salesreps the needed to call them on an intercom. One fellow’s name was Herb Lowe but when they called him they blurred it into one word, “Herblow! Herblow you have someone wating. Herblow.”
One of our technical sorts here is named Phu Dang. I was in a meeting last week where his name, appropriately drawn out, became a convenient source of mirth among the participants.
Someone’s not here yet.
Phu. . . Dang.
The migration and upgrade will be this Saturday. Who’s mandatory?
Phu. . . Dang.
I don’t want to miss the Superbowl. Who can cover for me?
Awww. . . Shit?
But did she get dick in the end.
To paraphrase BJ Cummings, from “Son of the Beach”…
They have two Dicks? Now that’s hard to swallow.
Just the other week they had a program on…it was like “Funniest Live TV Moments” or something.
There was an announcer calling a horse race, who got really into it near the end.
The lead horse’s name: Hoof Hearted (hart-ed).
So the announcer is screaming out excitedly (from memory, so not exact), “Hoof Hearted is closing in fast, Hoof Hearted is in the lead, it’s Hoof Hearted! HoofHearted! HoofHearted! HoofHearted! HoofHearted wins!” 
Well, then, allow me to continue the conversation…
receptionist: That dick is very hard to get hold of.
friend: A slippery dick, eh?
receptionist: Well, you know, we haven’t spotted dick around here lately.
friend: Have you looked long and hard?
receptionist: Well, I haven’t, but Johnson has. He’s a regular Dick Tracy.
Be glad they weren’t father and son, otherwise they might be referred to as Big Dick and Little Dick. 
<Ghostbusters>It’s true. Your friend got no dick</GB>
Ooh, let me take a poke at this…
friend: Sorry, did you say you have two Dicks?
receptionist: Yup, one working in the front, and the other in the back. That Dick that you are looking for, he likes to work in the back.
friend: Thats the one.
receptionist: Well, I don’t mind telling you, at first, it was a real pain, but once you get used to him, its actually quite pleasant.
friend: So having two Dicks working together is pretty nice, huh?
receptionist: Well, both Dicks are in and out of here a lot.
From Conan the other night (might have been a rerun):
“Dick Cheney’s lesbian daughter is coming out with a book about her relationship with her father. It’s going to be called ‘Why I Never Got Close to Dick.’”
receptionist: To tell you the truth, I hardly know the Dick’s full names. We can one Big Dick and one Little Dick.
friend: Which one is my Dick?
receptionist: Oh, he’s the big Dick. I don’t really like little Dick.
friend: Why don’t you like Little Dick?
receptionist: He just doesn’t fit in here.
friend: But Big Dick does?
receptionist: Oh he fits in great!
friend: I haven’t seen Dick in a while.
receptionist: Oh I have. I see Dick almost every day. People are always asking me to get Dick for them.
That reminds me of a skit done occasionally on the local radio station. It’s about the Dickens Fruit Stand, which is known far and wide for it’s famous cider. Quote from the skit “Why, my very own mama says she can’t go more than a week without having some fresh Dicken’s Cider!”
Clearly, the problem is that I’ve got Dick right here.
Dick.
Weird how a word can make you giggle.
L
Go to this site and scroll partway down-click on dickens.wav to hear a commercial for Dicken’s Cider.
Thanks DanceswithCats. That’s pretty much the same one as here, but with a different character doing the voice.
You think you’ve got problems? My first name is Peter which in the south has the same meaning as Dick. It wasn’t a problem growing up as I lived in DC. But when I was working at a grocery store I had a vietmanese coworker named Hung. So if we were on break at the same time, we would both wait for the break to end so that we could hear the intercom blurt out, “Hung, Peter. Up front.”
Hung changed his name to Alex a few months later. Hmmmm…