Might have been carried South by a swallow.
It’s not a coconut.
He could have chewed the top off of the coconut and traveled inside.
Taken a tiny sandwich, a little six pack and everything.
Now you’re just being silly.
Come to think of it, I have seen squirrels throw things. Acorns, mostly.
Illegal immigration is a serious problem.
Viscious, nasty Canadian rodents sneaking into the Good Old USA and casting dispersions on our cute, fuzzy native squirrels can not and will not be tolerated.
Sorry for bumping this thread, but I thought I’d share a little experiment I did today.
At work there is a moderately tall tree in the middle of the car park. Whilst I was standing under it, small nuts began falling onto me and in my immediate vicinity. This jogged my memory about this thread so I stayed under the tree to conduct an experiment. Looking up I could see a grey squirrel on a branch directly above me pulling off the nuts and letting them go. This could have been coincidence, so I decided to slightly move my position a few metres to the left so that now I was nearly directly under the squirrel nest (dray?) in the tree. The squirrel moved until it was directly above me again and started dropping nuts once more. The way that it dropped them wasn’t random, at all. They were falling at a regular pace, perhaps hitting the ground once every five seconds and were concentrated in the immediate area around me. Again, I moved, and again the squirrel followed me. This time I decided to stay in one place until all the nuts in the vicinity of where the squirrel was sitting were exhausted. To my amazement, the squirrel hopped onto another branch, picked up some nuts and then returned to the exact same spot, directly above me, and continued to drop them. Once it had exhausted those nuts, it went back to fetch more and continued to do the same until I finally moved from under the tree.
Hardly conclusive, I know, but I thought I’d mention it.
I told you! They’re trying to kill us all!
I’d imagine every American has a squirrel assassin assigned to them. They lurk in the shurbbery and trees outside our home-- little Oswalds with their ammo of nuts and twigs.
Of course, they’re rarely successful. Once a month, each squirrel assassin reports to his commanding officer, going down on one furry little knee before him. “Sir, I have failed you,” they twitter, and are given a stern lecture about duty and honor before being sent out once more to try again.
And don’t forget their feathery partners-in-crime, the mockingbirds!!
Fuck the mockingbirds. They’re the “hollaback girls” of the Animal Assasin Kingdom. The ones you really gotta look out for are barn swallows.
Once, a female built her nest on my porch. It was worth my damn life to get in and out of my front door every day. She would dive-bomb me, snatching bits of hair and screeching to beat the band. I would run like hell, arms aboe my head, toward the safety of my car-- and God help me if I dropped my keys.
I was real glad when her kids grew up and that bitch moved on.
I was staying at my brothers in central Florida. He had a serious squirrel problem. There were literally hundreds in his yard doing all kinds of damage to his house and property. With a high powered pellet rifle I took up the task of getting rid of some of the squirrels. I know, I know, how could I kill such a cute little verment. Let’s face it, they are a rodent and they were doing thousands of dollars worth of damage. They proved to be highly intelligent and a very worthy opponent. I didn’t take long at all for them to vanish every time I came out with my rifle. When I had no rifle with me they soon began to throw pinecones and acorns at me. It got so bad if I wanted to go somewhere I would have to run to the car or get pelted by pinecones and acorns. This became a all out war and I’m sorry to say it was not one that I won. No one can tell me that squirrels aren’t smart or they don’t throw things. Been there, done that.
When I was a teenager we got a bounty on squirrel tails; NASTY AMERICAN grey squirrel tails that is, because they were muscling out our cutesy red natives. I recall that we could get free shotgun cartridges as well. They chuck acorns at me - they get an ass full of #6 shot.
The scheme failed - they just produced more tree rats until or poor little natives are reduced to living on the Isle of Wight where greys go on penalty of death.