This thread is suggested by a rerun of some sitcom whose name I would not have forgotten if I had been paying any attention while it was on the other night. Anyway, the question is simple:
Married people, did you invite any of your exes to your wedding ceremony? If so, how’d it go?
There’ll be a poll up in a moment. While I don’t care if you’re married legally–Texas lesbians are welcome-- I am only asking the question of persons who had an actual commitment ceremony; if you just moved in together without any ritual, the question is not aimed at you. And no, I’m not going to apologize for not including an option for such persons.
Former boyfriends & girlfriends are included. People who have been in relationships with non-human animals and/or Live Dolls are urged to post in other threads on other boards in languages other than English or Italian.
I voted for pie, because no other options really fit, plus pie is never the wrong answer.
I invited an ex, and was sorry he couldn’t attend. When the Mister and I started dating, that ex was the first friend I introduced my now-husband to. Mr. M didn’t invite any exes, but he did invite his ex-girlfriend’s daughter, and we were both happy that she was there.
If you count guys with whom I had gone out a couple of times, there were five at my wedding who weren’t Mr. GilaB. Only one had been for as long as a couple of months. Mostly, they were invited by Mr. GilaB, not me; I invited one who’d ended up marrying a good friend of mine. None approached the level of ‘lovers,’ so I haven’t voted.
So, you can laugh at how fat they got and knowing they’ll be alone forever? (This is only counts if you’re getting married before them or they had a really bitter divorce).
One of my exes invited me to his wedding, but while the breakup was fairly drama free we weren’t exactly friends so I declined.
I got the sense that he just really wanted the feeling of having us both there-his uncomfortable bride (what is your recent ex doing here?) and the woman that he had dated for years and years longer than he’d even known his new wife.
It didn’t seem like an enjoyable way to spend a day off, and I haven’t heard from him since so I think I made the right call.
We had exes on both sides of the aisle. My husband’s girlfriend from high school is now married to my brother. She and Mr. Kalea have been best friends for years, and she was “best chick” at our wedding.
One of my exes catered the wedding as our gift, another merely attended. I was glad both of them were there, as my side was sorely underrepresented. After the post-breakup cooling off, we had remained good friends.
Not all breakups have to be soul rending traumas, though I had my share of that kind. Those exes weren’t invited, though it would have been tempting to rub their noses in how awesomely I traded up…
My husband and his most recent ex are still good friends, and we invited her to our wedding, with her boyfriend (who is also a good friend of ours). It was fine. To be honest, I didn’t have time to see half the people we’d invited (about 150 attended), but they got us a lovely card and gift and it looked like they were having a nice time on the dance floor.
My wife invited two of her ex-boyfriends to our wedding (both of whom had been friends of hers both before and after they dated). She mentioned that they showed up, but as there were 500 people at my wedding I simply couldn’t find the time to remember they were there.
My wife and I invited my ex to our wedding. She had invited us to hers a couple months prior, and we attended. My ex and her new husband came to ours. No drama, just good wishes for the happy couple in both situations.
I’ve been searching all my life for a pithy distillation of what is truly important. Thank you Lacunae Matata, thank you!
No exes at my wedding. While living together we once had an ex (mine) to Thanksgiving and that was very awkward (though probably due to the personality of the ex and not his status as ex).
One of my ex’s was the MC at my wedding. We had dated for a few months in college and then lost touch. A few years later we reconnected through some mutual friends, and have been friends since. I went to his wedding this summer, I’m friends with his wife, and I even go to a book club with a bunch of his sisters. The fact that we dated about eight years ago really doesnt come up.
I am on good terms with all of my ex’s and I really don’t see the big deal with being friends with them. I am only “good” friends with one of them, but I only live in the same province as one of them.
There were three girls in our group of friends in University and about 20 boys. I dated quite a number of them (and we all still remained friends with one notable exception).
The chances of us inviting any friends to our wedding and not inviting an ex of mine were pretty small. Since we are all still friends to this day, it wasn’t a problem.
(In fact, it is a rare occasion when I have a party that there is not at least one ex in the room.)
My husband did invite his ex which was a completely different situation (he was hung up on her for years before we started dating and I was a good friend to him when he was working his way through it). I went along with it and it wouldn’t have been a problem (though it would have bothered me on some level) but she didn’t come.
One of my my first girlfriends (and object of years of regret and quiet obsession after my first Big Screwup) was maid of honour at my wedding last September, and I was best man at hers this past Sunday.
Been so long in the “really close friend” category that the unmentionably remote past wouldn’t really figure into it, though.
I voted for pie because my option was not available. I didn’t invite exes (except on the Facebook “attending in spirit” page) because I’d just immigrated to a new country and there were none close enough to attend. There are a handful of exes I would have invited if it had been practical, and I can’t imagine any awkwardness would have ensued because of their ex-status. I’m on good terms with most of my exes, though I’ve lost touch with several.
There was at least one local ex of Parkhead’s who would have been welcome as well, but the venue was so tiny we had to limit the attendance to only his family members and one close friend/couple for each of us. I didn’t have any family members in attendance either. One of the pitfalls of being a bride in a strange land…
Neither of us invited exes to our wedding and we also did not invite any of our guests’ exes either. And we didn’t have to make any special effort to make that happen.
One of the pitfalls of being a bride in a strange land…