Die! Carrot-Top! Die!

The BBQ Pit
21

Damn, vanilla, I’m right there with you. Looks like he’s got some serious eye makeup on.

Gah! He makes my skin crawl.

Mutant gibbon. :: snort :: Perfect.

22

Let us not forget that this disgrace to redheads everywhere is just the latest in a long string of pitiful spokespeople for 1-800-COLLECT. It seems that those of elucidator’s “Suits” whose job it is to choose these braindead simps is on a roll. Or did everyone like David Arquette, Wayans Brothers #2 and #4 and Alyssa Milano?

Do those behind this whole thing wonder why they have to keep advertising for 1-800-COLLECT if it saves people so much money? Is it because the mere thought of “dialing down the center” turns stomachs?

Oh, and comparing this fuckweasel (Carrot Top) to Jerry Lewis is absolute sacrilege! :smiley:

23

It has been added to The List

Thanks for the complement. :slight_smile:

24

And what exactly do low-cut jeans have to do with navel exposure, anyway? Did the people at Old Navy actually believe that regular jeans were typically worn above the navel?

25

Well, I can only imagine what Old Navy would do if they were allowed to advertise crotchless pants on TV.

Yes, I’m a sick bastard. :smiley:

26
      • Derleth, is there a petition I can sign?
        ~
        I did like the Carrot Top bit about tying his hair up and putting on a dress and going into Wendy’s and ordering all the employees around while bitching about how dirty the place was. - MC
27

Sorry, but that blonde chick on the old navy comercials is one of my favorite shows.

28

Mmmm…Alyssa Milano…

29

I think it is very fitting that Carrot Top was in a movie (early to mid 80’s) entitled Children of the Corn.

30

carrot top is colon-cobbler and a good example of someone who is being “laughed at” and not “laughed with”. his humor is comparable to the curd what thrives on the underside of municiple toilet bowl rims.
the old navy commercial is annoying to me because it is for a mini-skirt, and we are supposed to be looking at a nice pair of legs, and all we get to see is this woman’s stringy hair and horse teeth.
mistress cleo does not rate a rant. anyone dumb enough to get taken for a ride from this puddle of runny ferret excretment deserves what they got.

HAVE A NICE WEEKEND!

31

I like you. (not a flirt reply, just saying im glad someone finally shares the same ideas as me):smiley:

32

Carrot Top is hideous! He is very scary. I usually love people with red hair, but this guy/girl is just hideous. The horse looks ten times better than he does and the horse’s behind with the tail Up looks better than he does! When his commercials come on I mute the sound and look away.

Ms. Cleo is getting more famous and she is beginning to make more and more money. Her dresses are better. Her hair is better and she has new jewelry and rings. I am very glad for Ms Cleo. This is a black woman who tappen into a fad business and made it a winner because of her personality. I am happy for you Ms. Cleo! :slight_smile:

33

Sigh…I may have to rethink my opinion of you, Zetter… :wink:

34

No, the inference I get from the above is that Ozzies are never sober. :wink:
As an aside, the way the subject of the OP is written - as several interjections vice one imperative (“Die, Carrot-Top, die!”) - it seems to me like a string of invective to hurl at another person. I know if someone yelled Carrot-top at me, I’d hafta hurt 'em.

  • Dave
35

I’ve longed to do this for such a long time.

Lighten up.

Really, who gives a shit? You don’t like Carrot-top? Big fucking deal. Of all the things to rant about, this seems pretty damn lame. I pray to God that this is the least of your worries.

36

“Trashing Carrot Top has become a national sport for everyone who isn’t Carrot Top…Carrot Top himself is a performer who defies convention. Is he an idiot or merely a moron? Does he make me nauseous, or simply headachy and kind of sad? Do I want to hit him in the face with a sack of flour. or in the groin with a Wiffle bat? Yes, sad to say, I’m joining the great choir of voices engaging in the empty sport of Carrot Top bashing.”
-Michael J. Nelson, from Mike Nelson’s Movie Megacheese [236,237]

Mike has some other great lines talking about Chairman of the Board, too, like:
“[Jack Warden’s character] dies almost immediately after his day with Carrot Top; unsurprising, as I myself spent merely ninety minutes with Carrot Top and was praying for my own death.” [Nelson 236-237]
And one of my favorites:
“One particularly ironic moment in the film is when Top and his two misfit roommates buy a crate of John Tesh CDs and use them for trapshooting. This is something akin to seeing Three-Stooge Shemp Howard make fun of Mortimer Snerd. Or, say, a garden slug insulting the intelligence of a mealworm.” [Nelson 237]

[sub]Works Cited:
Nelson, Michael J. Mike Nelson’s Movie Megacheese. New York: HarperEntertainment, 2000.[/sub]

37
      • Slight Hijack…
  • On another board I visit that uses auto-bleeping (printing asterisks for obscene words) people have taken to posting insults in Ms. Cleo talk, such as “Ms. Cleo say you be a sock of sheet!”
    ~
    -just a friendly posting tip. You socks of sheet.
    ~
  • Also, the carrot top movie did suck, now that I remember, it was a thin story based on his goofy stage props. Works for a nightclub act, but not for a full-length movie. - MC