Ok. There’s been a commercial appreciation thread, but there are many more awful commericals than good ones. I’m interested in knowing the commercials that you can’t stand. You know, the ones that make you mute the telly or change the channel.
Mine are. . .
The commercial for ENZYTE (Reliable male enhancement) where the guy with the scary smile is at the pool party, while the announcer talks about Enzyte using a variety of innuendoes. I HATE THAT COMMERCIAL!!! I especially hate the part where his trunks come off and everyone stares knowingly. WTF?!? Ew!
Those Kleenex Cottonelle commercials with all the closeups of the butts. Yuck. I don’t like the implications. Everytime that commercial comes on, my boyfriend says “Look Ma, no crusties!!” Basically, that’s the ad in a nutshell.
That commercial for Brawny napkins with the little fat kid eating barbecue and using a new napkin after every bite until he discovers the Brawny napkins that are thicker and can withstand more than one wipe. Ugh. That commercial nauseates me. Just watching it makes me never want to eat anything with barbecue sauce again.
AND FINALLY, I hate that laxative commercial with the girl and her sister (or the girl and her mom) where she says “Hey Sis, I peeked in your medicine cabinet. I see you’re using exlax.” or whatever. I just don’t like the attitude of that one. I also hate that they show the girl getting up the next morning with a big smile. EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW.
Anything with Carrot Top.
Those Sprint wireless ads where people do moronic things (buying a monkey with a cold, shamu, whatever) because they had a bad connection. It was kinda funny when they first started, and the guy in the trench coat showed up in a town where everybody spoke in static, but now… all it does is make me glad I don’t own a cell phone.
In fact, forget just Carrot Top. I hate ALL the collect-calling systems. Want to save your friends money on collect calls? DON’T CALL COLLECT. Thank you. If you’re going to make enough collect calls that it makes a noticeable dent in their phone bill, you’re making way too many collect calls.
Oh God, I forgot about those 1-800 COLLECT/CALLATT commercials! Those really are terrible. They’re also ridiculous. When I was a kid, I was always told that collect calls were for emergencies ONLY. Who the hell are these people who use it for everything? No one calls collect that frequently.
Every single radio spot for Mercedes. Examples:[ul][]Guy just bought a new Mercedes and all he can do is sit in it and yak about how great it is. Even when his kid comes and tells him dinner’s getting cold.[]Guy just bought a new Mercedes and all he can do is yak to his coworkers about it. At least he’s imrpoving, he finally got out of the car!Guy loves girl because she owns a Mercedes. Girl kicks guy out of car and all he can do is complain that he didn’t get to drive yet.[/ul] A search here will turn up more examples.
That one where they’re demo’ing a commercial jingle for those new cracker chip things, and the lady singing the jingle goes,“Chacker…” Makes me cringe, it’s so…cheezy…
The commercial for the magnetic sunglasses (they connect with a magnet on the bridge of your nose).
Everyone that puts on the sunglasses treats it as a life-changing event. At one point some nearly brain-dead girl says, “you don’t even have to concentrate, it just snaps.” Which is tantamount to saying, “These sunglasses don’t even tax my limited mental capacity.”
I like the “monkey with a cold” one. I think the monkey’s cute. :o
But I do sooooo hate Carrot Top. And Billy Mays.
And the Cottenelle one that focuses on people’s butts. That one is really offensive.
And the one that talked about TP lint. I don’t want to hear about lint on my nether regions, thanks anyway.
And yes, that new one, “It’s a chip, it’s a cracker, it’s a chacker”
Ugh.
And the Yoplait yogurt ads with the two girls, “This is private island good”
“This is massage good”
“This is favorite song on the radio good”
“This is driving barefoot good”
This is SHUT UP, BITCH, GOOD!"
I’m visiting the 'rents in Buffalo. What’s the deal with all the goombah auto dealership commercials? “Aay, 'cmahn dahn here and save ahn uh twotousandtwo Ceahvuhleeuh. Da savings, they’re HUUUUGE, yo!” There’s four different dealerships running commercials where the narrators are the most … well, Sopranos-like salespeople they could find. Why aren’t the Polish-American or Irish-American auto dealers screaming as well?
Hey Jared, congrats on losing all that weight… now please… take Clay Henry and buy yourselves a bucket of wings and a six pack. (c’mon… you know you want them).
Hmm.
Right off the top of my head, the one for McDonald’s salads. The one with the lady, singing the stupid salad song.
“Hey McDonald’s. I want a salad…blah blah blah…I want lots of chicken. And I want it warm.”
I heard it on the radio the other day. Please let that one end soon.
Then there’s the “got chocolate milk” ad where the kid is standing outside a convenience store with a bottle of plain milk and a bottle of chocolate syrup, pouring both into his mouth and gargling himself up a mouthful of chocolate milk. I guess it didn’t occur to him to put the syrup into the bottle and shake it.
My problem is with any ad which has as its overlying message, “You need to buy our product because you are a total loser moron, and our product will save you.”
I KNOW I’m a total loser moron; I don’t need my TV telling me that. Probably why I don’t watch much TV, and that’s mostly taped so I can fast-forward through the commercials…
