Dinner's ready! Don't everybody die of a heart attack at the same time!

We did not plan for this hurricane accordingly. So today we have no meat and the stove is looking suspect. I looked at what we had and came up with a killer dinner. Literally, this dinner will raise your bp and cholesterol.

Took the deep fryer out, did up some potatoes. Then dropped eggs in there and served them over the steak fries. It’s a Meatless Monday meal that goes against every reason why I have a meatless meal once a week!

Tell me, what is the most bad-for-you meal you’ve made for your family?

Probably Pizza Fondue.

Brown sausage/ground beef and/or bacon, about 1/4 pound per person.
Add about 1 cup per person of the pizza sauce of your choice.
Bring it to a simmer, and then drop handfuls of mozzarella cheese into it, stirring after each handful until it melts. This part is technically “to taste”, but we usually use something close to a pound of shreds.
Dip stuff in the Pizza Fondue and nom.

Stuff may include cooked meatballs, cubes of bread, chunks of cheese (yes, really), and, for the truly daring, fried mozzarella sticks. Or, if you’re still intent on that “healthy” illusion, strips of cut up bell peppers, red onions and pea pods.

It’s insanely good.

There’s a north Italian hot oil dip called bagna cauda. Literally it means “hot bath” Equal amounts of butter and olive oil are warmed together gently. Minced garlic is added to taste, so this means “lots”. Then you stir in anchovy filets and get them all broken up.

Kept warm its a dip for cold, fresh veggies and chunks of fresh bread.

I learned of this dish while watching an episode of “Babylon 5” As Dr. Franklin said “I call feel my arteries hardening just being in the same room with it!”

I served it at a B-5 themed dinner. They loved it but I imagine our cholesterol levels were up afterwards.

How do you deep-fry eggs?

Hard-boil, then beer-batter?

Crack an egg directly into the boiling oil. When yolk looks as done as you like, scoop it out with a slotted spoon. Easy-peasy!

Bagna is a local specialty where I live. You can get it in a couple of restaurants, and a bagna feed is a New Year’s Day tradition for many. I intend to take that tradition with me someday if/when I move.

Generally you cook the dunked items (beef/chicken/shrimp/veggies) for a bit before removing them and placing them on a slab of soft (french is what I’ve always had) bread that absorbs the oil. When the bread is saturated you eat it.

At the restaurants you get a cast iron skillet on a burner at your table.

Fried pork chops with biscuits & gravy and fried okra. It’s like deciding to include some food with your salt and fat.

Pitta bread with humus and fried ox brain (92% cholesterol.)

Whenever I make sausage gravy, several drug stocks take a jump.

My grandmother’s pork pie back when I was a kid. I think it had two cups of lard among the ingredients.

That sounds vomitous. What is the result? How does liquid fry up? What the fuck does a deep-fried egg look like?

Like a fried egg. You find fried eggs vomitous?

Calm down, hon. You can also boil eggs outside their shell. (It’s called poaching.)

Three Cheese Mac and Cheese;

1; leftover trader joes cheddar M&C
2; feta cheese crumbles
3; Stilton blue cheese (crumbled)

Nuke the leftover M&C, and mix in the other cheeses to taste

Probably the worst we’ve done is fried chicken and velveeta shells ‘n’ cheese. Usually we try to balance the unhealthy with something healthy. Sometimes we just throw caution to the wind.

When I make BLTs, I always use fried slice for the outer layers, instead of toast. People ask me what I do with the leftover bacon grease. I’ll figure that out if I ever have leftover bacon grease.

My grandfather would fry eggs in bacon grease from the bacon he’d cooked just prior, and rather than flipping them over, he’d scoop the grease on top of the fried egg to cook the top.

He died of a heart attack when my mother was a teen.

My grandfather did this as well. He’s 86 and his cholesterol and blood pressure are perfect. My grandmother, who is 10 years younger than him and eats virtually nothing, is on blood pressure medication. Life is not fair.

The worst thing I make for dinner is chicken breasts filled with a cream cheese/onion/herb mixture, wrapped in bacon, then baked. I do not make it often.

Oh yeah. Eggs basted medium in bacon grease, yum. That’s what I grew up on. Don’t have those often anymore.

We do have the “Okie dinner” fairly regularly because it’s quick & easy and the SO loves it, despite the HAOAP level.

Fried ham, redeye gravy, fried potatoes, fried okra, black-eyes, biscuits.

Chronos, what the heck is “fried slice”?