Favourite “junk” recipes?

What are the favourite “junk foods” you like to make at home? I don’t mean whether or not you like Big Macs or Popeye’s chicken, I mean what recipes do you have a guilty hankering for that are cheap, unhealthy, easy to make but oh-so damn tasty? Right now I’ve got a severe jones for some Frito pie

Nachos - round tortilla chips with a dab of medium salsa on top, covered with shredded cheddar cheese and then broiled until melted.

Pizza Bread - spread a piece of bread (any kind of bread - but not like raisin bread or anything - just white bread - like Butternut but english muffins work, or plain bagels, a slice of french bread - oh hell - you know what I’m talking about) with Pastorelli Pizza Sauce, cover with Mozzarella Cheese (and Cheddar if you’re me) and bake until the cheese melts.

Cheese Bread - mix some cheddar cheese, a little swiss cheese, some parmesan if you have it, some finely chopped onions, and some finely chopped green olives with pimento into a glob of mayonnaise - spread on bread (see above for the types of bread) and then bake or broil until the cheese is all bubbly and browning.

Those aren’t ‘junk’! They are in steady rotation in my house, and are more popular than you could imagine.

I cook pasta - either thin angel hair or radiatore, add butter, parmesan, garlic powder, and a little ketchup. Mix, consume. Ramen noodles are faster but the pasta is something I’ve made since I could boil water.

One of my favorite cheap and lazy dinners is to fry cubed chicken in a skillet, add a bag of asian medley vegetables and top it all off with an unhealthy dollop of storebought sweet and sour sauce.

  1. Kraft Dinner.

Just before it’s boiled add in an unGodly amount of broccoli florets.

You might think the broccoli mitigates the guilt somewhat, but no, it’s still Kraft dinner!

  1. Boil penne pasta, again, just before it’s finished boiling add frozen green and yellow bean with baby carrot medley. Drain, add cube leftover whatever (chicken, pork, beef, ham…), stir into pasta well. Top with Parmesan and fresh ground pepper.

If I need to make it as a full meal, like for company, just add garlic bread and small side salad. Cheap, easy, one pot meal made with even a small amount of left overs.

Ooopsy, forgot the “slather in garlic butter” part of recipe number 2! Missed the edit window!

Mine too! For probably one or two days out of every week one of them is my dinner. But the OP specified not good for you, cheap, and tasty. They all fill that bill. :smiley:

  1. Try it with a glob of cream cheese stirred in, too. I will leave the exact definition of “glob” to your conscience. :smiley:

  2. I do pretty much this, only I let it get cold and put in some mayonnaise for pasta salad.

More junky pasta wizardry:

Acini de pepe or similar tiny pasta, boiled in chicken broth or bouillon, add garlic powder, some herbs, minced onion, and butter. Eat as a soup.

Hot egg noodles tossed with butter and Michigan brand cottage cheese till it’s melty. Add lots of cracked black pepper. Serve with kielbase and peppers for a quick dinner.

Ordinarily, I am not a pasta eater because I consider it to be empty calories. Therefore, I eat pasta in the way other people scarf potato chips, guiltily. It’s weird.

OK, not pasta:

Patty melt made with breakfast sausage patties, Kraft singles, fried onion, and mustard on whatever bread.

Ham and cream cheese and butter on toast with ajvar pepper spread.

Tomato and mayo “salad.”

Refried bean soup: Simmer canned refried beans with a can of milk, garlic, dash of hot sauce, and sharp cheddar. This is great when you don’t feel good but are still hungry.

Hamburger and onion gravy SOS over mashed potatoes. Sometimes instant.

Pudding from a box. Also used to make this, which is better than it has a right to be.

Frozen berries mixed with dry oatmeal and a little sugar and salt, nuke till it’s bubbly, top with sour cream. Bonus points for doing it in a coffee mug. (I “invented” this when I was in grade school and would make it for my friends. It’s still good.)

I have a lot of healthy recipes, too, I swear! :stuck_out_tongue:

Sausage Bread (just made it for dinner last night)

1 lb loose sausage browned
1 cup grated parmesan
1 cup grated mozzarella
2 eggs beaten
1 pizza crust in a tube
garlic powder
salt
pepper

Roll out pizza crust on cookie sheet. Mix together eggs, cheeses, garlic, salt and pepper. Spread egg and cheese mixture on middle third of pizza crust then top with browned sausage. Fold bottom third of pizza crust up onto sausage. Fold top half down on bottom half. Seal crust around edges. Flip over. Cut steam vents into crust. Bake at 350 for about half an hour. Let rest 5 minutes before eating.

Homemade Chocolate Rice Krispy bars! 10 oz bag of marshmallows, 2 Hershy’s milk chocolate bars, splash of vanilla. Melt in a double-boiler. Stir into 5 cups of Rice Krispy’s cereal. Turn out in 9x13 pan. Cool and cut into a squares. Yum!

Jello Instant Pudding made with cream instead of milk.

Mac and cheese made with cream instead of milk.

Kids’ sugary cereal–Capn Crunch, Cocoa Puffs, etc.–with cream instead of milk.

“Yo dawg we hurrd you like cream so we put some cream in your cream so you can cream while you cream.”

Mmmm, you want junk? Oh, I got junk recipes.

Among my current cravings:

  1. Homemade Puppy Chow
  2. Scotcheroos
  3. Strawberry Pretzel Salad
  4. Fried Okra with hot sauce
  5. Homemade Doughnuts made with Whomp Biscuits
  6. Jalapeno Cheddar corn muffins made with Jiffy cornbread mix

I’m sure there are many more I don’t recall just this minute. These things are all slap-your-mama good as well as being horrible for you. :wink:

Oh, and I just thought of a couple more:

Jalapeno Popper Dip

Crack Dip

Cherry Dessert

Looking at the items I’ve posted, I’m wondering if I shouldn’t just book my cardiac suite right now. Yikes!

My guys are quite taken with Buffalo Chicken Dip lately. I find it way too salty, but tasty, so next time, I’m gonna make it with my own leftover chicken vs. canned.

And Mexican lasagna, which is neither: take whatever you’d normally put in a burrito (except for the fresh veggies,) layer it in a lasagna pan, and put it in the oven until everything is melty and delicious. Mmmmm, tasty. (And, to give it a little credit: way easier to serve than burritos.)

The kids adore Cake Mix Cookies. When I make them, I feel like some unholy combination of June Cleaver and Rosanne Conner… which I kind of am, come to think of it… (I do, in fact, speak jive.)

ETA: I gotta try that jalapeno popper dip!

Cheesy Potato Cassarole. Hands down.

There’s a few variations, but the short version is: One bag of O’Brien hashbrowns (diced potatos with onions and green peppers) mixed with a tub of sour cream, a can of Cream of Chicken soup, a can of Cream of Celery or Cream of Mushroom, spread into a greased cassarole dish. Add 1/3-1/2 of a 1lb bag of cheese and mix together, then dump the rest of the bag on top. Bake covered for a half hour or so until bubbling, then uncovered until the cheese browns.

Magic.

It’s always my go-to dish for potlucks, and people invariably love it. It’s piping hot, chewy umami magic.

I also don’t usually love pasta, but the classic leftover trick of taking last night’s pasta and sauteeing it in butter with some black pepper and powdered Parmesan cheese – yeah, I could eat way too much of that.

Next time, try cooking up some bacon, and frying some chopped onion and the pasta in the bacon grease.

Not a recipe, per se, but I only have these once in a blue moon because they combine pretty much everything bad for you in one sandwich:

3 slices of white bread (preferably Wonder or any other marshmallowy tasteless, thing that passes itself off as “bread”)
Add Cheez Whiz (no Velveeta as that is just nasty)and plain ripple chips to bottom layer, add second slice of Cheez Whizzed bread, on upper layer add mayo and ketchup, two thick slices of balogna (I prefer waxed Maple Leaf), one slice of Kraft processed cheese. Top slice of bread gets slathered with mayo, mustard and placed face down. Finish with large glass of Coke to wash down the gluey bits between your teeth, and grab the cardiac paddles before your heart stops…

Cut up some gold or red or gold and red potatoes. Boil in salt water. Drain water when done and add to the pot: bacon grease, cream cheese, sour cream, Lowrey’s Seasoned Salt, dash of chili powder, dash of garlic powder. Stir until as combined and chunky/creamy as you want. Stuff into craw. Make “healthy” by adding corn and/or peas to the pot and adding heat while stirring. Latest variation was a diced turnip and half a sweet onion to the boil. Disgusting and delicious.

Try doing this in a 10" round deep dish instead of a lasagna plan. Makes it much easier to layer. And yes, it’s very good and reheats well.

If you’re going that far you may as well have carbonara.