What really kills the cycle of b-days, and what may be an underlying issue here, is reciprocation. At some point, the people you do stuff for on their birthdays drop the ball when yours rolls around, which means you do nothing for them next year, and eventually everyone’s been burned and no one does anything.
The gift you got from a lot of people this year was a more open calendar next year, when their birthdays roll around - enjoy.
I treat myself like a princess on my birthday, but I don’t really expect anything special from my friends. I try, I really do, but I don’t remember anyone’s birthday, except my closest family, and they get a card (sometimes, if I get my shit together enough to mail it) and a phone call.
I’m sorry you didn’t get what you wanted from your friends, but I hope that you had a good time on your birthday, which was the point of taking everyone to the theatre, wasn’t it?
I think that you need to buy just 2 extra tickets next year, and the money that you save on the tickets can be their gift to you!
I have been stiffed on B-days before in a similar manner, and I have learned to enjoy not spending my money on people who care less about me than I do/did about them.
Making a deal about birthdays is for men to do for women and parents and relatives for children. For a grown man to be fussing or moping that friends are insufficiently attentive to his birthday is frankly a little embarrassing. You really need to put on your big boy underwear and move on re this issue.
This is just plain wrong. Human emotions are human emotions, and they are not embarrassing. Do not shame this man for having feelings. “Big boy underwear”? There is not one speck of compassion or understanding in that expression, which is permissible in my world only in jest when someone is feeling song.
The “feeling” by a grown man that his friends should be acknowledging his adult birthdays beyond a facebook post or saying happy birthday at most is, to be perfectly frank, ridiculous. If someone wants to go out of their way and get you something or do something for you, fabulous, but expecting something beyond a verbal or FB acknowledgement is moving up the emotional maintenance ladder.
He’s sad because people are treating his birthday like any other adult man-friend’s birthday and acknowledging it with a casual gesture. That’s the way it’s done. Feeling bad about this is a self indulgent waste of energy.
*“Sad? Why should I be sad? It’s my birthday. The happiest day of the year.”
“Your birthday?” said Pooh in great surprise.
“Of course it is. Can’t you see? Look at all the presents I’ve had.” He waved a foot from side to side. “Look at the birthday cake. Candles and pink sugar.”
Pooh looked—first to the right and then to the left.
“Presents?” said Pooh. “Birthday cake?” said Pooh. “Where?”
“Can’t you see them?”
“No,” said Pooh.
“Neither can I,” said Eeyore. “Joke,” he explained. “Ha ha!” *
I agree that it is silly for me to be upset about this, and not the way a grown man should be acting. That’s a fair criticism. But to be fair I’m not making a big deal about this to my friends. I’m not stirring up a bunch of drama or stomping my feet or whatever. I’m just in an emotional point of my life and I think any other birthday it would have been fine, I wouldn’t have made this thread, etc. I’ll grow up and be more calloused in the future.
I don’t really know what else is going on in your life at the moment drewtwo99, but if it’s generally crap stuff and you’re feeling vulnerable, it wouldn’t have mattered what your friends did or didn’t do, you’d still feel like crap.
Birthdays are markers that put the year under a magnifying glass. Great year? Brilliant birthday - regardless of how you spent it and which friend did what.
If you don’t usually make a big deal about your landing-on-this-planet date, and you did this year, it’s probably because you thought it would propel you out of the cesspit for at least one day of sparkly joy.
I think it didn’t; and you’re projecting that inner discontent onto your sister and your friends.
I know you could afford to spend the money, and you may have done that on a quid pro quo happiness basis without realising it until the emotional pay-off didn’t happen.
So celebrate how magnificently shit your birthday was because it couldn’t have been any other way, and be thankful that your friends did their shitty best to share in your special day of shit.
Oh, and Happy fucking birthday!
Wrong additude. Callouses only form when you practice self-pity over and over again.
It may seem cynical, but expect nothing from no one, and when someone actually does something for you, from their heart and without obligations, you’ll find joy and gladness that’ll last all year instead of the inevitable resentment you set yourself up for when you expect something — anything — from anybody.
Inside every grown man is that little boy left over from last year 
I think you mean ‘callous’..but hey, you’re the birthday boy! Say whatever the hell you want!
Once you are past 11 or so, no one cares about your birthday except your parents and your SO. If you care about your own birthday, do what you can to make it fun, but don’t expect everyone to remember.
How can you get stiffed on a birthday? No one owes you anything. If you give gifts in the hopes of equal or greater returns then you are doing it wrong.
You just gave like 20 excuses out of the year to celebrate and have a good time. I don’t understand you Grinchy people. I will celebrate for any reason whatsoever.
I love birthdays! I enjoy dragging it out for an entire Birthday Week. I feel for the OP. My husband had a pretty huge 30th birthday in December and since it was Christmas we were back home in Michigan, so it was all of his family and people he loved. On my 30th birthday in March, I worked like a normal day and that weekend went out to dinner with the two friends I have in this town. The people I spent the time with were lovely, I just wish I could have been with my family - the people who were there when I was born and felt something stronger for this milestone in my life. I got a raw deal.
I think you should tell your friends how you felt. They probably had no idea you felt in need of some extra attention this year. Then maybe next year they’ll remember and you will feel more appreciated.
Agreed. Not sure where all these negative attitudes come from. In my circle of friends we at least take each other out for dinner. Sometimes a gift and/or party is involved. I understand the OP’s disappointment.
If nothing else, drewtwo99 should be looking forward to his sister’s and his friend’s birthdays when he can expect to be treated to dinner and a show. If the friends he treated expect presents on their day, then he can be disappointed.
I have a friend who is Chinese and he says, have to take his word for it, that they (the Chinese) GIVE presents on their birthdays. So he has taken my wife and I out for dinner to celebrate his day, much like drewtwo99 did. Makes me uncomfortable. I don’t mention my birthday to him becasue it would be so wrong if he gave me a present.
I may be projecting here, but I kinda think I understand what you mean. I don’t like people to make a big deal about my birthday. I’ve had 2 surprise parties given for me in my life - once in high school and once in my 30s - and both were sort of awkward, tho ultimately fun. I wouldn’t want another.
I can count on cards with checks from my mother and mother-in-law (criminy, I’ll be 60 on my next birthday - just a card is fine!) My husband and daughter will remember, but never with gifts, which is fine. My sibs send me ecards, reminding me that I’m the eldest, and again, that’s no biggie.
BUT, one year, a coworker brought me a potted plant on my birthday. She didn’t make a big deal about it, but it was a very sweet and touching gesture. After I retired, my former boss emailed me with snarky wishes - again, unexpected and very much appreciated. So I’m thinking that somewhere in the back of my mind, I’m always hoping someone will do something like that again. Not a big hoo-haw, no bands and confetti and champagne fountains, but that little something that says “I know it’s your birthday and I’m thinking of you.” I might be a little bummed if it doesn’t happen (which is most of the time) but every once in a while…
And only peripherally related, my mom turns 80 two weeks before I hit 60. That summer, we’re hoping to take a cruise of the British Isles. To be honest, the milestone birthdays are just an excuse. 
I understand his disappointment too, but as evidenced by this thread, lots of people don’t and never will. It seems like his friends fit into both categories - those who care and those who don’t.
I want people to think of me on my birthday too. And yes, it is about “I’m still alive, and still kicking”. But it’s better to expect nothing and then when you get something, it’s very pleasing.
And I suspect it’s the OP’s being SO-less that explains, in a large part, why he’s feeling the way he is.
I moved to Germany after college and quickly learned that having a birthday in Berlin is a whole different ball game!
In Germany, YOU pay for everything on your birthday! Yep - if you have a local bar, it is expected that YOU buy rounds for everyone…and it can add up quickly! If you want a party, YOU buy the cake and the food and the drinks and invite everybody! You pretty much had to shell out a nice chunk of change on your birthday and, short of taking a trip out of town to escape the fact, you were stuck coughing up some major bucks.
I might add, Germans get mightily pissed off if you DON’T buy them drinks in a bar, or throw your own party on your birthday and invite everyone you know. Granted, they might possibly bring some flowers or a bottle of wine, but don’t count on it.
At first, I thought this was a horrible tradition - but then I started to get invited to other birthdays and sort of liked the free drinks and a party with no obligations to bring anything or do anything.
At any rate - just wanted to put into perspective that, at least in Germany, you had a pretty normal birthday event; you paid for everything and got a couple of verbal good wishes, end of story.