So if you hear a knock on the door, open it, and it’s the GF asking if Steve is home, and you just saw Steve go upstairs with his side girl, what’s the neutral thing to do? Just not answer the door? Would that count as covering for Steve? Hmm.
I’d find a new friend, jeez.
This is taking me back to my college days. I, the lone girl, shared a house with my husband and four of his guy friends. Some of them were pretty terrible. But none of them cheated on anyone that I’m aware of.
That’s part of I’m not covering for him. Not going to lie for him. Up to him to do what he wants with that information.
I dunno, maybe the neutral thing is to yell up the stairs, “hey, Steve, Susan is at the door”.
I don’t want to get involved in this.
I’m not sure I get what you propose to do. If you’re not going to lie for him, you tell the GF “yeah, he’s upstairs,” just like in the poll?
I’d consider that covering for him, myself. I’m pretty sure Steve would. Maybe that’s what it comes down to: whether you putting an obstacle in the way of her finding out the truth is covering.
I think covering for him is telling Susan that he’s not home. Or pretending no one is home by not opening the door. 
What i did let’s the second woman know that a woman has come calling. He’s presumably cheating on her, too.
How is this any more neutral than the story in the poll? You’re still informing to a girlfriend while playing innocent; you’re just switching which you’re informing.
And while I know we don’t know for sure, there are plenty of women who don’t mind being the side chick. If the other girl is such a person, then I’d say you’re definitely covering.
Right. Just stay out of it.
I=he is home but busy right now. I will tell him you dropped by.
That could work.
Does the pollster mean “books by John Dickson Carr.?”
Well,
- the poll suggested that you somehow set up the meeting.
- I’m pretty sure Susan is going to ask to come in, and I’m not going to say no. So i ain’t think I’ll end up “covering” for him.
- it’s neutral because that’s also what i say if the UPS guy is at the door, or whatever.
What would you do?
There are also plenty of women who don’t mind if their partner has other partners. I get introduced to “my girlfriend’s boyfriend” all the time.
What makes it cheating is if you are lying to one or both of them about it. Maybe I’m wrong, but I’d guess if he’s lying to one of them he’s lying to both of them.
I’m not sure if I ever read the Hollow Man but I do know the solution from…osmosis? I have read the excerpt about locked room mysteries somewhere. It’s been reprinted in books about Mystery literature.
I would absolutely consider that covering for him, 100%.
- In the sense that you lured the GF into coming to the house at that specific time? I’m afraid I don’t see it.
- Then you’re doing exactly what the story in the poll did: pseudo-innocently letting her find out the truth for herself.
- I don’t see how that follows. You know who’s upstairs with him. Do you think Steve will take your action as neutral if he knew about it?
As for your last question, my point is not specifically what I’d do, but me thinking about the situation after posting and realizing that I can’t think of an action that I would consider “not getting involved”; you are either facilitating the discovery of the cheating, just like in the story, or you’re helping to obscure it from the girlfriend.
I don’t think Steve has any right to complain. He put me in the situation where both women are at the house and I’m standing between them.
Complain? I meant that he’d be delighted that you gave him a heads up and would specifically ask you to keep being his bouncer in the future. That’s not “not getting involved,” IMO.
I can’t remember if I’ve read Carr. I read a lot of stuff; some of it stays with me, some of it doesn’t, and some of it stays with me but not with the author’s name attached.
I read a number of Carr’s novels and remember mostly liking them*. I was a teenager at the time, though, and it’s quite possible they don’t hold up all these years later. I have a vague recollection that the characters were not especially well developed, and that he couldn’t write about women except in very stereotypical-for-the-time terms, but I could be wrong. I did like the puzzles.
*There was one novel, don’t recall the name, where on the first page the detective tells us that a particular character was not the murderer–only to have that character turn out to, guess what, be the murderer after all. I objected strenuously. (I think I’m remembering this correctly–)
Not sure who Carr is.
Immediately thought of John LeCarre, whose work I have read (A Most Wanted Man) and I thought it was great. In an emotional sucker-punch way.
Hmm, i gave him a heads up, but I’m also opening the door when Susan asks to go in. I don’t think he’s going to thank me. But also, fuck him.
I think I know which one you mean. And I agree that was a cheat even though the puzzle was a good one. Stabbed to death with a clock hand, if I recall correctly.
He was an American novelist who lived in England, I believe, and is best known for his locked room mysteries. Someone is dead in a locked room–who did it, and how was it done? He had two main detectives who always seemed pretty interchangeable to me: Gideon Fell and Henry Merrivale, I think were the names.