I do not want to get lipo and I’m not eating much as it is—but as I slide into middle age (“slide, Kelly, slide!”), I notice with horror a creeping, incipient case of dreaded Reagan-neck.
Are there any exercises that work on firming up the neck area? I go to the gym, but I don’t think tying weights around my neck and letting go is the answer. How about stretches, or pushing the tongue to the roof of the mouth?
Or am I fated to tuck my turtle neck into turtlenecks?
Supposedly there are some exercises that work…like, while pointing your chin up as high as possible, making extreme face gestures (mouth/jaw) will work the neck muscles. (sorry, I’m having trouble describing this better without sounding perverted).
I think you can tone the muscles a bit, but over time your skin becomes less elastic, so some Reagan-neckness is inevitable.
Exercise? Pfui. Do you really want to be seen around the old Metrop doing the Silent Scream? (Although it does come in handy for frightening small children). Neck, I mean, Heck, no!
I’m saving my pennies for a Neck Sling Procedure. That, and I pay an old gypsy woman a stipend to periodically curse my grandmother, whose turkey neck I inherited.
Maybe I should do what Marlene Dietrich did: braid the hair around my hairline REEEEELLY tight, tie it back and slap a wig over it, so I look like a perpetually surprised Asian woman.
Well, I will try these “nexercises” and see if my incipient double chin goes away . . . If not, I will have to wear “Maude” scarves.
Reagan neck?! Double chin?! Say it aint so, Eve.
Here’s an exercise for you to strengthen the neck muscles, which might help some:
Go to the gym and lie flat on your back on a bench with your head protruding over the edge. Let your head fall back (in a controlled manner, obviously) and raise it up again so you’re looking at the ceiling and your chin is close to touching your chest. Do 2-3 sets of 15-20 reps 3-4 days a week; after a couple of weeks hold a five pound plate against your forehead while doing the exercise. Eventually you might make it up to ten pounds, but take your time.
If you can’t make it to the gym, you can try these on the edge of your bed.
“Reagan neck?! Double chin?! Say it aint so, Eve.”
—Uh-oh, there goes APB’s crush on me . . . Thanks for the exercise, dear; can you think of anything ELSE one might do in bed that might strengthen the chin and neck muscles?
Eve, you could always land a recurring role on “Ally McBeal.” The senior partner in Ally’s firm has a well-known wattle fetish.
straps on anti-brick helmet
Seriously, toning your neck muscles will have only a minor effect on loose neck skin, I’m sorry to say. Fortunately you’re WAY sexy and have no need to worry about it.
Back in the 1920s, women used to sit in front of their vanity mirror (keep…face…straight) before bedtime and pat the underside of their chin(s) five hundred to a thousand times with the backs of their hands. Kind of an alternating slap thing. Couldn’t hurt.
Well, Ike, I’d like to see photos of what those women looked like by the 1940s and '50s before I commit myself to sitting there bitch-slapping myself up and down my bedroom.
Do neck exercises work? Of course they do! Tune in to an NFL game sometime and look at the necks on those big bruisers. I’m not sure why you’d want your neck to look like that, but they do work.