Who is Jack Schitt? Many people are at a loss for a response when someone says “You don’t know Jack Schitt!” Now, you can handle the situation.
Jack is the only son of Awe Schitt and O. Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, owner of Knee-Deepn’ Schitt, Inc. In turn, Jack Schitt married No Schitt, and the couple had six children: Holie Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Giva Schitt,Bull Schitt, and the twins Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt. After being married for 15 years, Jack and No divorced. No later married Mr. Sherlock and because her kids were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was known, of course, as No Schitt-Sherlock. Dip Schitt later married Loda Schitt and they produced a cowardly little son, Chicken Schitt. Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt were inseparable throughout childhood and consequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony on their farm. The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Bird and Horse. Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour Europe, and recently returned with his new wife, Pisa Schitt.
Now, when someone says “You don’t know Jack Schitt!”, you can correct them.
(Alright, alright, I know it’s old, but I thought it was funny nonetheless.)