So we got a call on Monday morning, right after midnight. My wifes son, her first child, killed himself. I’ll call him T.
My wife married her first husband, we’ll call him Jackass, at 17. They ended up having three kids. He was very abusive, liked beating people including my wife. She ended up leaving him but got absolutely screwed in the divorce when she was about 21. You see, it was a very small town down south and the judge in the divorce case was Jackasses cousin.
Anyway, she started paying support and doing all the right things. Then my wifes father died. She told her ex that she was going to the funeral and was taking the kids with her and would be back after the funeral. He said ok. When she got back from the funeral he had her arrested for leaving the state.
There was a lot more of that type of shit (and I have stories on all sorts of other crap Jackass has pulled on other people, the guy is a piece of shit. I checked his arrest record and him and his wife have all sorts of shit, DUI, kiting checks, theft, etc).
After all this, my wife finally gave up. She was alone, 21, no real job, no real family in a small town down south. So she left town. Jackass made her getting to see her kids a full on nightmare. He’d call the police on her for imaginary issues. He’d claim she didn’t take the kids back, that she wasn’t taking care of them, that she was selling drugs, etc. All of it bullshit.
She gave up after years of this.
Some time passed and we met. She told me about the situation with Jackass and her kids. We contacted the kids and she picked up the pieces. Jackass got pissed and made all kinds of threats but this time my wife had backing and wasn’t a scared kid.
So things got much better with her and her kids.
T, after a little while, told my wife and I that he was abused by Jackass. Beatings and that sort of thing. My wifes daughters confirmed this. But for some odd reason, instead of getting the hell away from Jackass, T tried to remain close to his father and step mother (Oh, another nifty fact. Jackass cheated on my wife with his present wife, we will call her B. The really disturbing thing is that Jackass was 27 and B was 16).
Anyway, T had lots of issues. We tried to help the best we could. T joined the military but was released shortly after boot camp for PTSD. Think about that for a second, the military released a 22 year old kid who just got out of boot camp for PTSD. How in the hell does that happen to a 22 year old kid?
T bounced around a bit. He got in relationships and turned into the abuser. He fathered a child with a woman and had that relationship end when he hit her. He got a DUI. Some other shit along those lines happened. We talked to him and T started therapy. He got a decent job. He got another girlfriend. He seemed to be doing ok. Still had a lot of work to do but he was going to therapy, working on the problems and doing the right things.
On Sunday night he was at a party and his girlfriend broke up with him. T went outside, called B (remember, that is his step-mom) and, with her on the phone, shot himself.
We got a call from my wifes daughter shortly after it happened. My wife is a wreck.
To make things even better, Jackass and B set up the funeral to happen very quickly and have been making all sorts of threats to my wife, via third parties, should she show up. My wife was speaking to Jackasses sister, who had been sorta ok in the past, and the sisters husband was in the background saying shit like ‘Come out here and we’ll kill you’. Another friend from down there said that Jackass is telling everyone he is going to have the police arrest my wife (for what? who knows) if she steps inside the town. Lots more of that kind of shit.
On the obituary, Jackass listed B as the mother of T and didn’t mention anyone on my wifes side of the family. He has told people that anyone from my wifes side of the family who shows up is going to get their asses kicked. The thing is, he will start a fight.
So my wife won’t get to see her son before his is buried. It is ripping her up.
Additionally, B apparently is telling everyone that during the call T blamed my wife. Jackass and T are telling anyone who will listen that T killed himself because of my wife.
It is bullshit. I suspect that T called B to ensure she was on the phone when he did it. If you are going to kill yourself and want to call someone, you are going to call the person you blame.
Anyway, we aren’t going to the funeral. We are planning a rememberance out here. It is killing my wife but she realizes that we don’t need the drama.
Sometimes I can’t believe what utter scum some people can be.
Sorry this is a bit long and disjointed. Been a hell of a week.
Slee
I’m so sorry. Hang in there.