The thought of this has been bothering me for a little while but I don’t have much experience or exposure to people who have been sexually abused so I don’t know what to make of it.
I have a cousin here in Ohio, she’s 13 years old, and extremely sexual. More so than normal 13 year olds should be.
She’s been kicked off of AOL both at home and at her grandmothers house for being obscene in chat rooms. I think that she shouldn’t have had access to chat rooms in the first place, but she has access to the Master Account and therefore does anyway.
She dresses promiscuously and has been caught masturbating in public. She frequently vies for male attention by exposing herself and groping boys.
Just recently, she was caught sending notes to her brother’s friends (who are about the same age) relating to things like how nice her ass is, wearing thongs and exposing herself to him to see if it would excite him, comparing her body to a friend’s, doing sexually explicit things to him.
Her mother brushes off the incidents as “things a normal 13 year old does” but I have never heard of another 13 year old doing that. She’s having trouble with the father, but the exact details I do not know.
Her father is emotionally abusive and almost never around, he devotes his life to hunting and is almost always on a trip. The whole situation is very hush hush in my family so I feel uncomfortable asking about it, but I think just by her actions that she may have been sexually abused.
I’m afraid that this girl is going to end up pregnant at 13 because she is not a very bright girl by any means. She’s sweet, but she’s an airhead that flaunts her body and begs to be taken advantage of.
If any dopers have any insight into this I would greatly appreciate it.
Well, it could be sexual abuse. But I also know children with tourette syndrome, bi-polar disorder and schizophrenia that display these types of behaviors–usually when the child has a combination of these 3 disorders and not usually when she has only one of them.
I think before assuming it is a sexually abusive situation, a complete medical history should be taken by a pediatric psychiatrist.
ladyfoxfyre, I have “heard of another 13 year old doing that” (or close), and she had been abused. This is of course only a sample of one on my part. But I think you’re right to be concerned.
Even if she hasn’t been abused, it sounds like she needs some serious and seriously competent intervention.
i’m not sure. The emotional abuse could be doing it though as i’ve heard similiar situations happen due to emotional barrenness from one or both of the parents. the whole ‘craving male attention because the father didn’t care’ freudian shtick.
I used to behave that way when I was 13 and 14, and it was because I was starved for affection and understanding. As for my past, I was emotionally abused, and there was some physical wierdness back when I was 7 and 8, but no sexual abuse.
I think it is enough that you have the concern. Go with your gut. Inform someone who is in a possition to investigate it, like a school councler or even social services. It is obvious that this girl needs some kind of help. It this case it is better to be wrong than to do nothing.
It is suggestive of the possibility of sexual abuse, though as others have pointed out, there could be another cause. It’s certainly not normal behavior, and it would be appropriate for you to alert someone with the authority to look into the situation. Whether it’s abuse or mental illness, it sounds like the girl needs treatment.
Seems more like she is trying to get attention. They do this stuff to get attention from people. Maury, often has young women on his show who are like this & sexually abuse never comes up, that I can remember, seems quite the opposite. You should watch him cause he has shows like once a week, ‘My ten/twelve/fourteen year old dresses like a slut’ Etc.
I’d suspect sexual abuse, and yes, she’s doing it for attention, but her choice of doing THAT for attention is why I’d suspect sexual abuse.
If not sexual abuse, there has at least been some gross crossing of a boundary with her, maybe her dad, I dunno. OR she could just be a natural born hypersexual type. Probably a combination of factors, but the first thing I’d suspect is sexual abuse. Either way, she needs help, so does her mom, the whole family in fact.
and you should NOT watch Maury povich for any reason.
Maury Povich is hardly a good place to get your information, handy. I’d think you’d know something like that after all this time. I’ve watched the show a few times. Of course they don’t mention sexual abuse. They don’t mention any possible causes for the behavior. They just send them off to a day at boot camp or prison, which will “cure” them roughly until the cameras stop rolling. It’s a freakshow, not a place to glean medical advice.
Her mother thinks her behavior is normal and her father doesn’t care at all about her. This is all the reason she needs to act the way she does. Abuse is possible, of course, but even without abuse, her behavior makes perfect sense given her parental situation.
How is her mother? Does she dress like that or act like that at all? The daughter could just be acting the way she’s seen a close female behave. Just a thought.
Such aggressive and overt sexual behavior in a 13 year old is not normal. Make sure someone investigates this situation. At the very least, this young girl needs to be taken to Planned Parenthood for some counseling and birth control. She is an ideal candidate for teenage pregnancy.