Does the Koran really promise Islamic martyrs 72 virgins?

[cosmosdan]

@John Vasar

Go to Google: Keyword is “THIRD NEPHI” or “Nephi the son of Helaman”
Enjoy the next 30 chapters.

No quibble, no quarrel. If God is real, if God is true, He can really answer you.
Ask him if the story is true. Convince him that you need to know. Only in earnestness will He reply to you. I know. I’ve tried it. I am genuinely happy and at peace with God.

This is not a joke.

Please let me know the results.

Lot’s of people who are just as sincere and convinced as you are, have asked God earnestly and still believe something quite different than you do. I’m glad that you’re genuinely happy and at peace with God but that doesn’t mean you’ve got all the details right. It means you feel good about where you are for now as in, at this point in your life. You’re not done learning and growing and the details of belief you embrace so enthusiastically now may seem different to you down the road. Have a good journey.

[sqweels]

@naita

Apostles on the American continent? My guess would be something mormonic.

There’s a slight typo there.

[Cervaise]

@John Vasar

Enjoy the next 30 chapters.

Ehhr whuh?

Um, are there Cliffs Notes?

[Revenant_Threshold]

It’s actually not that long, or so it seems.

Haven’t found any virgins as of yet, but I have found people being cursed so their skin turns black. And then uncursed and turned white again, for their good acts. So… yeah.

[Elendil_s_Heir]

Not long after 9-11, a friend forwarded me an email joke in which one of the hijackers shows up in the afterlife. He’s beaten up by an enraged George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, James Madison, Patrick Henry and George C. Marshall for what he did to their beloved country. He complains through broken teeth, “I thought it was virgins, not Virginians!”

[naita]

@sqweels

There’s a slight typo there.

I know, but such typos are necessary here in CCC.

[Revenant_Threshold]

Ok, got the summong of the Twelve bit;

@3 Nephi 11 1

And now it came to pass that there were a great multitude agathered together, of the people of Nephi, round about the temple which was in the land Bountiful; and they were marveling and wondering one with another, and were showing one to another the cgreat and marvelous change which had taken place.

@3 Nephi 12 1

And it came to pass that when Jesus had spoken these words unto Nephi, and to those who had been called, (now the number of them who had been called, and received power and authority to baptize, was twelve) and behold, he stretched forth his hand unto the multitude, and cried unto them, saying: Blessed are ye if ye shall give heed unto the words of these twelve whom I have chosen from among you to minister unto you, and to be your servants; and unto them I have given power that they may baptize you with water; and after that ye are baptized with water, behold, I will baptize you with fire and with the Holy Ghost; therefore blessed are ye if ye shall believe in me and be baptized, after that ye have seen me and know that I am.

I’m guessing the “land Bountiful” is America, although it could be the wrong bit.

As for the meeting in heaven, apparently we may be met by 9 of these apostles…

@3 Nephi 28 2-3

And they all spake, save it were three, saying: We desire that after we have lived unto the age of man, that our ministry, wherein thou hast called us, may have an end, that we may speedily come unto thee in thy kingdom.
And he said unto them: Blessed are ye because ye desired this thing of me; therefore, after that ye are seventy and two years old ye shall come unto me in my kingdom; and with me ye shall find rest.

…but not the other three, who aren’t dead.

Couldn’t find anything on virgins though, 72 or otherwise.

[chorpler]

@Revenant Threshold

Ok, got the summong of the Twelve bit;

I’m guessing the “land Bountiful” is America, although it could be the wrong bit.

It’s just a particular part of the Nephite/Lamanite territory.

As for the meeting in heaven, apparently we may be met by 9 of these apostles…
…but not the other three, who aren’t dead.

And you’d be surprised how many good deeds they perform for Mormons!

[OneCentStamp]

@chorpler

And you’d be surprised how many good deeds they perform for Mormons!

Oh yeah, MULs (Mormon Urban Legends) about the Three Nephites are legion.

For some reason, LDS culture loves those kind of apocryphal stories. When I was in the Missionary Training Center, there was one circulating around, probably old even at the time, about how Wilford Woodruff (4th Mormon prophet) met Cain (son of Adam, cursed) on the road one day…and Cain looked like Bigfoot.

[Hilarity_N.Suze]

So the virgins have to be pure and clean, but do they have to be young?

I’m thinking Mother Teresa here. And 71 like her.

[Scuba_Ben]

@Elendil's Heir

Not long after 9-11, a friend forwarded me an email joke in which one of the hijackers shows up in the afterlife. He’s beaten up by an enraged George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, James Madison, Patrick Henry and George C. Marshall for what he did to their beloved country. He complains through broken teeth, “I thought it was virgins, not Virginians!”

The full joke is available at the rec.humor.funny archive. I’m glad to hear how old the joke really is in its current form.

[andros]

@chorpler

It’s just a particular part of the Nephite/Lamanite territory.

It certainly is.

I love Utah.
.

[chorpler]

@andros

It certainly is.

I love Utah.
.

Heh heh … just so nobody’s confused, that Bountiful is a modern city in Utah, named after the Land Bountiful in the Book of Mormon, a territory supposed to be somewhere in the Americas which was in turn named after a location near Jerusalem. I think there’s a polygamist-colony Bountiful up in Canada, too.

[JimOfAllTrades]

@andros

It certainly is.

I love Utah.
.

This isn’t “The Land of Zion” for nothing, baby!

Zion (Latter Day Saints)

[Little_Plastic_Ninja]

@Wendell Wagner

Itwelve apostles, plus another twelve apostles from the American continent, plus 72 virgins, all of who will meet us in heaven

Is it somehow bad if I first thought of those “they’re my network” commercials for that wireless company?

[rowrrbazzle]

@Hilarity N. Suze

So the virgins have to be pure and clean, but do they have to be young?

I’m thinking Mother Teresa here. And 71 like her.

“Much to Zarqawi’s surprise, the virgins who awaited him in Paradise were not quite what he expected.”

Go Blog and Multiply

[Slander_Q.Libel]

No, they got it all wrong… according to recent corrected translations, Islamic martyrs aren’t greeted by 72 virgins, but by only six.

[OneCentStamp]

@Slander Q. Libel

No, they got it all wrong… according to recent corrected translations, Islamic martyrs aren’t greeted by 72 virgins, but by only six.

Dude, that’s only five. :dubious:

[Cervaise]

Turns out there’s some confusion about the exact number of virgins.

[Fear_Itself]

@OneCentStamp

Dude, that’s only five. :dubious:

One of them has been a virgin twice.