…because…
I live in Og’s country.
I’ve never had an argument with my present spouse of 14 years.
I’ve always managed to land on my feet financially/jobwise.
I am completely debt free.
I can fix most things that go wrong with a house.
Don’t hate me because I typed this post with my penis.
One-fingered typist, eh? 
I’m going to graduate debt-free, having paid the lion’s share of tuition and board myself(this is due to my university’s unique Co-op program more than anything else).
Don’t hate me because I work at home, in my pajamas, every day, for my own business. No one can outsource me.
I’ve never had a hangover either but that’s because I have a system that involves plenty of water.
I hate all of you who are doing really well financially. I’ll get into your exclusive club someday! shakes fist
I’d say I hate you, but, uh…*
Don’t hate me because I’m naturally about a size 1.
*has been (very badly) hung over twice and drunk once
This is only applicable to women, but don’t hate me because I don’t suffer from PMS or get cramps. Apparently those really hurt a lot. The most I get is a mild discomfort that goes away after the first day.
Don’t hate me because I’m better than all of you. I can’t help it. 
Don’t hate me because I took the last splash of coffee on this beatiful sunny monday morning
Yes, yes it does. I’m afraid in order to redeem yourself, we’re going to need a cite missy.
'cause I’m a morning person.
I’ll now slink to the corner here, mkay?
Don’t hate me because I’ve never had a headache.
Nope. Not ever.
Not from a hangover, not from stress, not from the flu.
Never.
I don’t know why.
[sub]…although the stock market is trying its best to give me one. :mad: [/sub]
Don’t hate me because …
Hmmmm
racks brain thinking of something to brag about
Oh - I got nuthin’
Don’t hate me because …
I’m fed up with myself today and it would pretty sad to have everyone else hating me too :smack:
Si
Don’t hate me because…everybody else seems to, and it would be so nice to think that just one person might have the tiniest nice thought about me.
Don’t hate me because…I can make croissants and assorted danish from scratch.
That’s all I got.
Don’t hate me because… I’ve had four children and my stomach is still flat.
I live in between two chocolate factories and my neighbourhood always smells like chocolate. Sometimes it also smells like cookies when the wind is right.
I’d love a good croissant recipe if you feel like sharing…
How short does one have to be to fit into size 00’s? I’m not envious by any measure, because, in order for me to look normal at your clothing size, I’d have to shrink by at least half a foot.
Don’t hate me because I have become the research monkey mind reader. In the museum library I volunteer in, if we have a book on the topic you’re interested in, I’m likely to be able to tell you whether we have it or not via a quick scan of the stacks (or a little memory recall) based on things like “uhm, there’s this chest I saw one time at the flea market…” and “there’s this artist that does a lot of [insert subject here that’s ridiculously common]” with reasonably satisfactory results. Sometimes, however, there is no pleasing the customer, as there are no books in the library on such scintillating topics as 18th century Japanese clockwork and heavily documented Imperial Shinto rituals. (The latter one wouldn’t be common due to 1. lack of interest and 2. secrecy of certain rituals within the royal family. I may be wrong, but I doubt it. There is some documentation, however, on folk Shinto rituals.)
Don’t hate me because I have wealthy and disinterested parents. nyah-nyah-nyah