Believe me Screamergirl, I could care less which choice you make. If you do stay I hope you can do more than post to support your little buddy, who has only shown herself to be an ass.
So much fuss about a woman who touched a baby’s hands.
“Germs, germs!” the mothers cry. “Who knows where that woman’s hands have been?”
My thought is… Who knows where the BABY’S hands have been?
Uuuuuuggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
I agree… the baby-toucher is a nut! YUCK YUCK YUCK!
The phrase “I took offensive” does not mean “I am still offended”.
If I’d have said "I am offended at the “…” then, yes, you could assume that, but I didn’t, did I?
Reading comprehension is for everyone!
Screamergirl
I don’t believe that any of my posts have addressed anything that “my little buddy” has said.
Let’s see…
One post about a bitch slap…no, that didn’t apply to her.
One post about the “remark about motherhood feelings”…no…that didn’t apply to her either. That was addressed to the person who made the remark.
I believe, if I’m not mistaken, that the only post I’ve made that addresses her at all is the one where some sort of underhanded accusation was made about us maybe being the same person.
Hm.
You people are touchy to newcomers, aren’t you? Paranoid? Quick to flame? Can you tell me where that kind of hostility comes from?
Screamergirl
I neither said nor implied that you were still offended, I merely pointed that out in case you had missed it. But way to jump to conclusions.
Correct me if I’m wrong, but this is your response to me:
“…which was addressed, and you have no reason to be offended.”
Have is present tense.
Had is past tense.
Using “have” as you did above did indeed imply that I am currently (in the present) offended. Had you used “had” instead, you would be correct in your assumption that I jumped to conclusions. However, you did not.
The statement is incorrect. Regardless. And so is your conclusion that I jumped to conclusions.
I simply can’t help it that I read the english language as it’s written.
Screamergirl
Oh god now you’re going to quibble semantics. :rolleyes:
I suppose it’s impossible for you to not take offense to something, right? You absolutely MUST assume the worst.
Infectious Lass–I NEVER meant this to be a slam at women who are childless, whether by choice or circumstance. I’m so sorry I hurt you–I didn’t intend to, but I understand more than you might believe. You are not being irrational in the least. I know this is different, but I have felt the same way about natural childbirth. I am unable to give birth other than by C-section–twice now, I’ve tried labor and ended up with surgery. This time I go straight to the table. It felt like a personal failure–and I had two women in my church who delivered naturally just before and just after I did. I felt cheated. About 4 months later a friend–a 17 yr. old kid–popped a baby out with no trouble at all and it pissed me off terribly, because it felt so unfair. So while I would never pretend that the depth of my pain is the same as yours, I can understand how things like that can hurt deeply.
My point was only this–there have been remarks to the effect that we mothers are overreacting, overprotective idiots who seem to think that we can keep any harm from our children if we are just vigilant enough and stand gaurd 24/7. I only meant to point out the fact that until they’ve walk a mile in our shoes, they shouldn’t be handing out advice on how we should feel and act about our kids. And I also said that adoptive parents feel just as strongly–the kids are still their children. If you ever decide that this is the way you will go, then my prayers are with you, that you will find joy and peace in it. If not, know that still I wish you joy in your life. Again, my comments were not intented to slander childless women and I apologize for the pain I unintentionally caused you.
I don’t take offense at many things. However, I do take offense at being told that I jumped to conclusions, when according to the english language, I did not.
If you’re going to address me, or quote me, please do so properly, or I will argue semantics with you.
I try not to assume anything. Assuming leads to problems. That’s why I like precise usage of language. I read the words as they’re written.
I was correct in what I read, and wrote. If that fact makes you roll your eyes, then roll away.
Screamergirl
You know, I posted what I did to try to DEFUSE the situation. I didn’t want you to be offended, so I wanted to point out that you didn’t need to be offended. I didn’t know if you were still offended or not. I didn’t realize I needed to make that distinction to point out that we’d agreed with you. I see now I needn’t have bothered, you’re beyond hope, you’re just as determined to be abrasive as whats-her-face that you came in with. You guys deserve each other… so hey, why don’t the two of you (who don’t seem to care for the people here anyway) go wander off somewhere and get lost?
:::washes hands::: this was fun for a little while, but you’re not even arguing entertainingly anymore. Now you’re just grasping at whatever you could possibly get offended at, and running with it. Besides, I’m getting a headache from rolling my eyes. I’ll be on the couch reading my book.
See everyone on Monday when I get back in town!
Just for the record, I want to state clearly once more–if you are raising a child, you are a parent. I suppose that since the only term I used referred to adoption, maybe I wasn’t clear enough. But if you love and raise a child, no matter who carried that child, you are it’s parent!
And I can’t understand why it is so incomprehensible to some that you cannot understand an experience unless you’ve, well–experienced it!! As I stated in an earlier post, I have two children, but I haven’t the foggiest notion of what it’s like to actually give birth, because mine were born by C-section. So it would be terribly stupid of me to suggest to someone that I know just how they feel when it happens–because I don’t! I don’t know what it’s like to be widowed, or orphaned, or elected President either. Why?? Because I have never had any of these things happen to me. So why in the world would I become offended at the suggestion that I don’t know how it feels? I can be empathetic with sufferers of tragedy, I can celebrate with a friend who’s achieved a major victory, but that doesn’t mean that I know “just how they feel!”
<chuckle> You don’t like being proved wrong, do you?
Besides this little run in with you, I’ve made no indication that I “don’t like the people here”. Instead, I feel a great hostility from the lot of you to newcomers.
I could stay here and continue you irritate you with my precise grasp of the english language, but instead, I think I’ll pack up my typewriter and find a group of people who don’t pounce so distastefully at new posters.
Y’all should really work on your host/hostess skills. Unless of course, you’re happy with the little group you have here now.
Have fun patting each other on the back now, y’hear?
Screamergirl
Do you perhaps mean “I took offense”?
I guess your grasp of the English language isn’t so “precise” after all. :rolleyes:
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Screamergirl *
[toothless old grandma] We like newbies as is newbies. We don’t like newbies as is trolls.[/toothless old grandma]
Seriously, I’m sorry you feel unwelcome. I will hazard a guess that most newbies don’t start their time here hanging out in the Pit arguing on the unpopular side of a debate, and that’s why few others have complained of feeling unwelcome - not being critical of you, you understand, just observing this isn’t the best starting point. The friendly forums are over yonder.
Having followed ChildFREE in isn’t going to be doing you any favours either. We like to get to know our fellow posters before we scream abuse at them, and we tend to be taken aback when a newbie registers just to flame in the Pit - ChildFREE can say what she will, but many here believe she joined these boards just to be a troll. The perception is that she marched up to a group of strangers, butted in to their conversation and told them they were all wrong and that she was right because she was CHILDFREE[sup]TM[/sup]! This has put everyone on the defence a little. Then you join in and tell us you followed her over because she told you about our little conversation, and well… let’s just say that hasn’t helped us feel open and welcoming.
However, that’s contrary to the spirit of these boards, so I would like to take the opportunity to offically extend a big W E L C O M E on behalf of myself and any other member who wants you to have the chance to stay and contribute what you will. After all, it takes people to make a community.
I think there’s something in that for all of us.
Emily is a cutie. Now that I’ve had one, I just love newborns.
That said, jumping jehosophat, go away for a day and 3 new pages show up with some tag team trolls or a troll and a sock or two. Not even very amusing or stimulating.
If you don’t ask the parents permission first to touch their baby, you’re at best being rude. Beware the parental protection instinct, and accept the consequences if you trigger it.
emily is so cute. i want one of those.
sigh, i can’t wait for april. 
abuse angel, yet another mommy-to-be.
I never said I was right because I was childFREE in fact I never said I was 100% right … I stated my OPINION.
Here is my original post :
If the mother is so worried about germs why is the child even out in public?
Yes I heard … HANDS … TOUCHED THE HANDS … whoopie … germs are EVERYWHERE … not just hands …
Also what kind of idiot leaves their child on a changing table and walks away even if just for a moment??? HELLO …
All of you fussing about how rude and horrible it was for this woman to coo over the baby and touching the hands are probably the same people that get huffy when people want nothing to do with your children. Yes, that is right … there are some people that don’t think having a child is the most precious most important thing you can do with your time and life. And that children should rarely be seen or heard.
And before the comments begin let me answer this …
I do not have children (you do not need children to have common sense in fact it more often than not helps NOT to have them), You can not keep yourself or your children safe 100% of the time life is to be lived … if you have issue with this … STAY HOME … and finally if you get upset by my comments before you post a reply to them and get huffy with me ask yourself this … if you didn’t want the opinions of others why in the heck are you posting your woes on the INTERNET???
:::
Then some genius parental type said YOU JUST DON’T UNDERSTAND BECAUSE YOU DON’T HAVE CHILDREN … that is when I said that I had a dog / husband / and that I understood love and that YOU DID NOT need children …
then the name calling started … the ugliness and when MY husband said that people at Straight Dope weren’t like that … I went ONE STEP and got FUCK YOU, FUCK OFF, SHOVE THIS UP YOUR ASS, SHOVE THAT UP YOUR ASS, USE PERIODS, MORON, IDIOT, BLAH BLAH … and you called me a troll because I pissed you off by telling you that your attitudes toward me because of MY opinions and apparently my user name got me a FREE lunch because the majority of you were rude and nasty little critters.
Then because a friend of mine thought that it was an interest topic came in you all jumped dead in her shit too …
You are elitest an nothing more that big fucking fish in the tiniest pond. You nitpicked. You did nothing but call out names and make yourself feel special.
Yeah it is a flame board … tell yourself whatever you want to if it will make you believe that you are not nasty fucking people.
Yes that is right ImChildFREE and so proud of it that I used it as my username. This is why you jumped on my case … not because I said that I thought the mother over-reacted.
So think I am a troll, have me banned … I could not care less. It apparently isn’t as if I was going to miss much!!!
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by cazzle *
**
It is a FUCKING message board … not a group of strangers at a coffee shop for Christ’s sake!!! Get back to reality will you!!!
I’d just like to say that those were the same yummy photos we saw when Emily is born. They are just as wonderful the second time, but I wanna see some updates! UPDATES I TELL YOU!
Screamergirl, as I saw it, there were more than just a few people who quickly posted to assure you that we felt that a mom was a mom, no matter how the kids came her way. I don’t see that as being “mean to newbies.” If you found my comments to you to be rude, I sincerely apologize. My exasperated tone about other matters on this thread may have bled over to my paragraph to you, and that’s wrong and my fault. I’m sorry.
ImChildFREE, you immediately came across as hostile. You were belittling her worry over a strange person going up to her child and touching her. (Sorry, but that is strange behavior. I have a problem with strange men or women coming up and touching me as well.) Also, having your first posts in a thread about children, with your username, sorry, but historically on the board that is regarded as trollish behavior. It does not make you a troll. Consider, if I were to register with the name WhiteNProud (which I am! Hey, nothing wrong with white skin, right?) and were to go into a thread where a black individual were ranting about being discriminated against, and make blanket statements about ‘black folks’ (like you have made about ‘parental types’), people would look at me askance. Doesn’t make them sheep, does it?
Noone outside of a moderator may ‘have you banned’.
Trust me, you WILL be missing a lot. There are a huge number of posters and threads on this board, and you’re sure to miss something that piques your interest. But I would suggest, if you’re really interested in intelligent conversation, 1. Leave the Pit. 2. Moderate your tone. You’re coming across as condescending.
Your friend also came across as condescending, on a side note. Even if you hadn’t been here in the first place, she would have recieved the same attitude, with the tone in her own posts.