When doctors started telling us that my husband was going to die (he hasn’t) the thing I wanted most from other people was sympathy without pity.
Most people seem to find it very hard not to pity the person with the illness or that person’s loved ones.
Pity, well, it’s worse than nothing, really.
Of course, I’m still angry that I got expressions of pity at my wedding. If I could go back in time and punch some people I would.