I have a waist, but also a general “guitar shape”. And a properly fitted empire (i.e., not what you usually see) makes a woman’s tits look bigger.
I had a coworker who was quite pretty and gave shortbrains to about any man in her vicinity… but when she wore a particular empire blouse she had, the shortbraining was serious enough that those guys should have had their driving licenses temporarily removed.
Mind you, women who wear empire blouses with the seams in the wrong place should be taken out back and spraypainted in whichever color they hate most.
Mom gets the same shit re. diabetes: “yes I’m allowed to have fruit, just not too much in one sitting” “that’s one of the things the self-test is for, to find out how much is too much” etc etc and then “no I don’t want another piece of cake” “because I don’t” “listen, you wanna break your diet, go ahead, I said no” “you do have a problem with the word ‘no’, don’t you?”
Yes. I agree with this. I am going to go out and stockpile all the puke colors of spraypaint I can find.
The standard cup size clothing is designed for is a B-cup. This means most empire-waisted tops hit me just below the nipple-line, instead of below the bust like they’re supposed to. Super-unflattering.
I just got back from shopping for clothes. My problem is, I’m not fat, and I’m not skinny-I’m short with an hour-glass figure, so everything I find makes me look like I’m all tits. I hate, hate HATE all these baggy, gathered tops. The 80s are GONE, stop trying to bring them back!
I finally found a few things, but I’m dreading going shopping later this summer for a dress for my cousin’s wedding.
Part of my problem though, is that even if the latest styles this season were flattering, I think they’re butt ugly. At least with “Audrey Hepburn” styles, you can always find a little black dress that flatters you.
Oh Lord. Yes. That or you keep yanking it down throughout the course of the day like Captain Picard adjusting his uniform, except this bares the girls enough to be just this side of obscenity, where he just looks bald and cranky.
regarding capris - I have stocky, bloated ankles - capris only serve to bring attention to that.
regarding baby doll tops - I am so “over endowed” the seam separating the placket from the drape never lands on me where it should - it usually ends up mid boob. I have to wear trapeze tops to allow or that, and to cover my hips. I usually look for ones that have a decorative collar or a loud colorful print.
Oooh. A larger friend of mine loves wearing those, plus gauchos. :eek: And I’ve been at somewhat of a loss to figure out what to point her at that will be more flattering to her shape. She’s basically built like an outhouse (woo!), but doesn’t have a good sense of what would flatter her best, IMNSHO. That’s an excellent hint, thanks.
I bet I could armwrestle her into letting me have some of her pants hemmed like your suggestion re capris…
I’m using this in conversation tomorrow. (I’m dealing with telecom contractors, so I’m entitled to a regular venting of the spleen!)
For the record, I agree with the OP 90-95%. My wife and I are a little on the, um, “zaftig” side, and while we’re not proud about it, we’re doing what we can to deal with it and we certainly don’t deserve haughty weightest attitudes from self-important Ann Coulter clones.
Of course, the gate swings both ways… Why does Ann Coulter only take baths, not showers? Because she kept slipping through the little holes in the drain gate. Etc.
Gah. I just told a weightest joke, AND imagined Ann Coulter in the nude. Now I feel dirty.
I avoid most clothes with boob-related seams if at all possible. This means that most of those fun, fitted styles (like the empire waist-- done properly) are out of my range unless I want to draft the pattern and make it from scratch.
I do, however, like capris. They’re great for me because I have long legs and no real desire to wear shorts that are only an inch or two away from exposing my underwear. The in-between length is great for summer as well, because I get a little bit of leg ventilation and don’t end up feeling as overheated while still being covered up. I do, however, have some bermuda shorts and some cargo shorts in my closet, but unless I’m wearing the bermuda shorts with something girly on top, I look really insanely butch. The cargo shorts are purely for when I don’t care if I look butch because I’m doing outdoor work, so it works out okay.
I’ve found that capris can be quite slimming, if they flare a little at the hem. Like boot cut/flare jeans. The only time I wear shorts anymore is around the house-pjs, basically.
Body type is a very different thing than a talent or skill, do you realize that?
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but everybody does deserve to be respected. And respect means not talking down about or to someone because of their physical appearance
But there are standards to beauty, no matter how arbitrary and capricious they may be (and those standards vary depending on culture). And there is a genetic component to it–John Cleese (of all people) did a special on this years ago–how the brain works and how it recognizes attributes like beauty. I cannot remember the focus of the program, but I remember him showing Elizabeth Hurley vs his mug via some kind of computer topography program–it was fascinating.
Respect is different than appreciating or having standards for beauty. No one here is suggesting disrespecting the plain or overweight, the OP’s complaint aside–and even that can be interpreted several different ways.
Humans look for the exceptional and laud it. One of those categories is physical attractiveness, for better or worse.
A store like that existed for about 8 months - Forth & Towne (a Gap division). Elegant, classic clothing for sizes up to misses 20. Beautiful cocktail wear, casual wear, and most importantly - business wear.
It got shit-canned when the Gap executive who oversaw it either quit or got fired.
I adored their things. I always search eBay for their leftovers. (sigh)
You ought to look into some slightly fitted shirts. Hanes markets a fitted brand called “Perfect fit” and K-mart’s Basic-something-or-other brand has their own version called “classic” (“modern” is ultra fitted, “relaxed” loose), and I’m positive other stores and brands have similar. The cut of this style shows off your waist, rather than puddle around your middle when it’s large enough to accomodate your chest.
How about a shirt that fits my boobs, broad shoulders, waist, hips, etc. all at the same time as well?? (Which I am pretty much convinced does NOT exist!!!)
I was at Kohl’s the other day buying my 10 year old a shirt and tie for a wedding the next day and thought I would take a looksy at springy dresses for myself.
Has anyone noticed that rayon muu-muu type dresses are back? Ranging in size from the emaciated teen to the Meaty Woman Department. With LOUD prints are are not even quaint or charming like the past LOUD PRINTS.
Holey crap! I have never been so repelled by fashion trends before. Even Vera Wang’s clothing had a couple of silky/satiny shapeless sacks in really hideous colors (mostly mono colored, IRC) that would flatter about 1% of the population.
WTFH.
