. I agree that the winner should be the fan favourite for the tour. Wonky judging comes into play when the show wants to keep people around longer than the voters do.the judges have influence. I wanted tickets when Jordan Fisher won DWTS and gl
I saw that show when they played Reno, NV- it was a Christmas present from my daughter. Both Jordan Fisher, by far the best dancer that season, and Frankie Muniz, fan favorite, were in it. I thoroughly enjoyed myself, it was very entertaining. The tour has come through my town, but the tickets were too steep for me to break down and buy them myself.
[Slowly, inch by painful inch mustering the will to talk about this season.]
To start off, a recap of the season so far. Thanks as always to my good buddies at Primetimer for staying on top this, without which I’d most likely say the hell with it.
9/20 - Frenzied melee
No idea who anyone is. No idea who can dance, who the favorites are, who the lovable underdogs are, who are the ones to watch. Judges are more irrelevant than ever; scores are utterly incomprehensible and completely meaningless. Voting system still hot garbage, and the voters have about 30 seconds to decide which of the 15 contestants they want to distribute their 10 votes around to. Yeah, that’s exactly who you want to put the gross majority of the power in the hands of. 
There’s nowhere near enough time to cover so many contestants; they’re going 1,000 miles an hour here. It’s insane. Tyra Banks sucked then and sucks now. I can’t believe anyone’s trying to softpedal her. Flashbacks to the attempts to “rehabilitate” Dubya. Outrageous.
Pretty sure that Cobra Kai guy is toast, though.
9/27 - Frenzied melee, plus they have to cram in an elimination 
If it was 1,000 miles an hour last week, it’s more like 1,200 now. Forget bringing back Tom Bergeron, we need John Moschitta. My head is spinning. I can barely follow anything that’s happening. Cobra Kai guy is toast, so the “obvious 1st round cannon fodder so we can give the actual good contestants more time without ever having to give up the eternal immortal holy anudda wun bi da dus” gambit worked as planned. This is the only positive vibe I will receive from this season for a very long time.
10/4 - Britney Spears night! (Hey, are we still arguing over whether she’s a virgin? 
)
Derek Hough taking a health break, meaning that we’re cruising at a relaxed 800 MPH this evening. Okay, so Olivia Jade is the daughter of that scumbag crook, and Iman Shumpert is the teammate of the good Cavalier, correct? Oh, joy. Some rando I know absolutely nothing about gets bounced.
10/11 and 10/12 - Tacky costumes that are probably really hard to dance in two-fer!
And of course, given that the time slot is still bursting at the seams and Hough just returned from his health break, let’s have the episode where we don’t lighten our burden! 
But don’t worry, we still have time to hear Banks use words like “mommy” and “daddy” unironically, and “unironically” I mean “despite her being over the age of 6”. (Seriously, I find this absolutely jarring…by far the worst moments on Shark Tank are when Kevin O’Leary says “stinky poo poo”. You can’t think of any better way to put it?) I don’t care what anyone says, all that blue paint can’t be good for Shumpert’s skin. And I really don’t see what the point of pairing Jojo Siwa with another woman is you’re going to force one of them to play a male character half the freaking time.
10/18 - Way long ago movie about heavily fictionalized way, way, WAY long ago America night!
Hahh…look…I remember liking Grease. Okay? I really did. I remember it being a lot of fun. I’ll probably get the DVD someday with no buyer’s remorse. But…and this is very important!..it is not The Movie for me. It’s not even The Musical (that would be Jesus Christ Superstar). So I’m not filled with worship like these contestants seem to be. And since scores, and by extension dancing skill, mean absolutely nothing (coughBobbyBonescough), that means the only real draw are the costumes and set pieces…and…did we really need this? I’d actually prefer a Hair night. That’d at least be different.
Oh, and around this time Cody Banks got Covid and had to fudge a couple rounds as a result, which Primetimer is apparently super furious about. 
And Melanie B is out. Alas, Len Goodman couldn’t help her because he had to save…Olivia Jade?? 
The something-something child of something? When did she become a protected class? Sheesh…
10/25 - Horror night (as in movies, not the current state of reality TV)
Lessee, you’ve had an annoying 90’s pop fixture, extremely non-human body friendly cartoon characters, and outdated mid-20th century stereotypes. Where do you go from there? I know! Put them in really ugly costumes and have them pay tribute to my least favorite movie genre! Even better, lots and lots and lots of screaming! 
Uhhhhh. What exactly am I supposed to care about again? Are the contestants even required to do any specific moves anymore? I’ll return when I have answers. Or at the end. One or the other.
Wheelz - It came up in my “In praise of the season 28 premiere” thread (here’s the direct link. The problem, in a nutshell, is that votes have a wide variance and scores don’t, and with no one getting truly bad scores, the judges are more irrelevant than ever. I think best-to-worst weighted ranking on the judges’ end while keeping the votes mostly the same would work the best but then we couldn’t have lots of pretentious shouting and catchphrases, and we all know how important those are.
Sorry I meant to say that I saw DWTS in Windsor when Jordan won. I wasn’t so much impressed with Frankie but Jordan filled in for Keo who was sick for a couple of routines. That was impressive. This season I prefer Iman for a completely opposite reason. He’s not the best dancer but he’s the best student on the show and is demonstrating a Joy in his movement which is very enjoyable to watch. He may not win, but I hope to see him at the end with my other faves Melora and Jimmie. If he gets eliminated it would not be because he didn’t give it his all.
I’m stoked that Iman got Rhythm Nation that’s a great chestnut and strong tempo to dance cha cha to and We know he can inject some Jackson flair
I fully expect Melora to take the Foxtrot Damce off, but Iman won’t be too bad he should be able to hold his own.
All right, whatever-they’re-calling-third-episode-to-last is over. Lingering questions.
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Do all reality show judges just eventually go completely off the deep end? When Carrie Ann Inaba bumrushes the stage for no good reason, that’s the point where I’m convinced the very concept of judging on this show has completely lost hope.
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What the hell was up with Melora’s award acceptance speech, and shouldn’t there be measures to prevent this kind of behavior, especially since these stupid “dance-offs” have rocketed the show back to 1,200 MPH territory and we can’t really afford to freaking waste any time here?
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Why does anyone get choked up over needing a judges’ Routine Required Decision At The End of Nearly Every Show (a.k.a. “save”)? If the judges have your back, that’s a good thing! And if it sparks a Sanchez Rebound (which appears to be exactly what happened with Jojo Siwa), that’s even better!
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Why are we having only the blandest, stalest music in the history of American music for the entire freaking season? I remember when there was some plenty of variety, everything from Walk The Moon to Nelly to Enya. Now we’ve had Britney Spears, Grease, horror movies (read: oldies smorgasbord), and Janet Jackson in consecutive weeks.
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Who’s giving crap to Suni Lee… and more importantly, why? Even if you think her lasting this long is 1. a travesty, and 2. something to give a crap about in the first place, how is it her damn fault? The voters decide 90% of everything; a 10-second decision that the judges pad out into 3 goddam minutes decides the rest. There can’t be anyone left at this point who doesn’t understand this, can there?
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Did I jinx it with comments like “It’s earned the right to exist.” and “If ABC hires a real host and relegates Tyra Banks to a support role like they should’ve done in the first place, this old horse may have some life yet.”? Not that jinxes exist in the first place, of course, but if they did, that has got to be the most freaking disproportionate act of divine retribution ever. We’re talking a “killing kids for making fun of a man’s baldness” level of disproportionate. I mean, I could’ve filled those threads with wall-to-wall crushing pessimism, but do that all the time; can you blame me for wanting to take a break every once in a while?
Two more episodes…two more episodes. 
Well next week will be full of Contemporary Dances. Dancing with the Stars: Semi-Finals (11/15)
Semi-Finals, Here They Come!
**Six Remaining Celebrity and Pro-Dancer Couples Go Head-to-Head As They Face a Double Elimination
. The judges will mentor each of the couples. Len Goodman will mentor Amanda Kloots, JoJo Siwa and Melora Hardin; Carrie Ann Inaba will mentor Suni Lee; Bruno Tonioli will mentor Cody Rigsby; Derek Hough will mentor Iman Shumpert. For the second round, couples will perform another style of dance as they each vie for a spot in this season’s.
The couples (along with their dance styles and songs) are the following:
- Popstar and dancer JoJo Siwa and pro Jenna Johnson will perform a redemption Argentine Tango to “Santa Maria (Del Buen Ayre)” by Gotan Project; then for their new dance, a Contemporary to“Before You Go (Piano Version)” by Lewis Capaldi
- NBA basketball star Iman Shumpert (“We Got Love Teyana and Iman”) and pro Daniella Karagach will perform a redemption Tango to “Telephone” by Martynas; then for their new dance, a Jazz to “Dark Fantasy” by Kanye West
- Olympic gymnast Suni Lee and pro Sasha Farber will perform a redemption Foxtrot to “Haven’t Met You Yet” by Michael Bublé;then for their new dance, a Contemporary to “Gravity” by Sara Bareilles
- TV and film actress Melora Hardin (“The Bold Type”) and pro Artem Chigvintsev will perform a redemption Rumba to “I Don’t Want To Wait” by Paula Cole; then for their new dance, a Contemporary to “Thunder” by Imagine Dragons
- Talk show co-host of “The Talk” Amanda Kloots and pro Alan Bersten will perform a redemption Tango to “Titanium” by David Guetta featuring Sia; then for their new dance, a Contemporary to “Live Your Life – Nick Cordero” by Lenii
- Celebrity fitness guru Cody Rigsby and pro Cheryl Burke will perform a redemption Salsa to “Danza Kuduro” by Don Omar and Lucenzo; then for their new dance, an Argentine Tango to “La Cumparsita” by Forever Tango
This is a season where it isn’t really clear who is going to make the finals. There is no excellent dancer in the group, all six are good/interesting in their own way. I gained more respect for what the pro dancer and producers are doing for Jojo after seeing her in the Queen special. Regardless I will watch eagerly because I’m addicted.
In he FINALE. Iman JoJo Cody and Amanda
Iman is the most exciting star in a very long ro make it to the final. He and Daniella are 
Hope they Win! It’s just astounding the lifts and the finesse and the musicality of this team.
Yeah, this is the last season I’m going to record. What finally pushed me over the edge? Tyra Banks. I don’t care what kind of excuses or sugarcoatings you offer. She is constantly annoying. That’s the long and short of it. And that a thing I absolutely cannot brook. Despite what you may have heard, constant annoyances don’t get better over time; they get worse. If my family wants dance, dance, dance, they can VOD it on their own time. It’s not going to be an easy sell, but I don’t intend to waste any more of my life wallowing in irritations.
(Also, I’m fairly certain the judges aren’t coming back from the abyss. They’re just hard to watch at this point.)
Now then, the contestants. I mentioned before that I didn’t want to spend a lot of time talking about a contestant only to see him or her get bounced the very next episode. As we’re at the final now, I’m fairly certain that I’m safe. First off, the last two eliminatees.
Suni Lee - Yeah, this sucks. It took a while to find her groove, but she definitely looked like she lived up to her potential at the end. Even if it’s nothing but a popularity contest, I’d expect an Olympic gold medallist to have some degree of excessive popularity. Ah well.
Melora Hardin - As I mentioned in past threads, I never watched The Office, so she pretty much flew under my radar (the 1,000 MPH cruising speed certainly didn’t help). So someone kindly enlighten me: Does she NORMALLY go into incredibly long, rambling self-aggrandizing speeches at completely random times? Like, bleah. No surprise that she got bounced, as no one survives this kind of breakdown in crunch time. She seemed to have fun, at least.
And now, our finallists; in the spirit of this show, in no particular order:
Cody Rigsby - Ugh. Remember Bobby Bones? You should, because the exact same thing is happening here. He’s rough, he’s awkward, he has lousy chemistry, and it doesn’t matter a molecule because his fans go into hyperdrive every week. With the judges effectively defanged, he could run away with this. And there will be rampant misery. As usual.
Iman Shumpert - While the Cirque Du Soleil lite stuff is kinda neat, I still think that things like elegance, posture, fluidity, and y’know, the actual steps should matter in a ballroom dance competition. I don’t like it when a contestant yo-check-this-outs his way to the final (I said something similar about Kel Mitchell two seasons ago). Still, he’s accepted his limitations, listened to his pro, worked hard, and made an honest effort all season. That’s something. Dunno how much, but definitely something.
Amanda Kloots - Uh…nice hair?
Jojo Siwa - Well. Once it got to be “two beautiful women dancing together” and not “one woman in a dumpy costume and the other in freaking drag to fit with the ridiculously forced theme”, she absolutely shined. The Sanchez Rebound came at just the right time to propel her to the finals, and she has as good a chance as anyone of winning it all.
Winner? Who the hell cares. It’s all about voters, and not even all the voters, but the ones willing to grind out text messages within an extremely specific time of the week. The DWTS champion is the best or most likable contestant in the same sense that the president of a video game company is the best or most likable employee. The real victory is the performances we got to see (whatever you were able to pick out of the top fuel dragster-level pace and the tyranny of anudda wun bi da dus). The hardware is just tradition.
The Cirque du Soleil light that the uniformed always yammer on about is not what Daniella brought to the dance floor. Cabaret Ballroom has been around since the 80’s. It’s a legit form of Ballroom dancing In which timing, coordination and finesse are an important part of the equation. The dance is in the execution of such difficult choreography. None of the contestants could dream of doing the heart stopping lifts that Iman did, paired with an incredibly brave, creative and innovative pro. Iman the one with no dance experience and Daniella is trusting him with her life! Who does that? Iman the guy who puts more than just a little swag into his work complete with the Le Bron James Silencer. If he loses it’s because middle America just doesn’t get how such a cool guy would actually put it out there.
This is what the show has been lacking.
Save me from yet another professional dancer who danced more Jazz the style she’s been doing since she’s been a tadpool. And they mangaged to turn the Argentine Tango into a Bob Fosse number. Aren’t they clever? JoJo and Jenna are the most annoying duo on the show. Agree that Tyra takes the crown for being just horrendous.
Dude, seriously? I barely remember anything the damn wrestler did. I am not getting into a debate over the intricate nuances of Not Lebron James, because that would require me to take the time to look up, watch, and analyze his performances, and screw that. Given that Cody Rigsby’s also in the final (a mere three seasons after Bobby Bones’ triumph), it’s been pretty obvious for some time that whatever you were talking about doesn’t have much impact on who wins anyway, but I’m not going to react negatively if we get another “outrageous” result. Or at all, for that matter.
As I remarked to my wife, Jojo and her partner are the only duo where I can’t tell the pro from the celebrity contestant. They should win.
I try to FF the parts with Banks trying to add something to the show when I can get away with it.
The difference is that Bobby Bones was actually entertaining. I am mystified by Rigsby’s popularity. He is no better or worse as a dancer than Bones was, but he brings zero else to the table.
I think he and Cheryl may still be getting COVID sympathy votes. Or maybe he just has the gay vote locked up. Being gay doesn’t give you a personality, though.
True, DWTS has always stretched the definition of the word “Star,” but the guy who yells at people on Peleton screens is one of the biggest stretches yet.
That would never be my yardstick.I’ve voted for professional dancers in the past. People like Jordan Fisher who was so good he substituted for a pro on the Tour. But he also had a decent personality. JoJo not only leans heavily on her Jazz background that she wasn’t the best ballroom dancer, Melora Hardin has far better ballroom technique, she is one of these annoying theatre brats who is always “On” JoJo types are too many to count.
Well it was a great finale. Iman and Daniella brought the house down with their wonderful Chicago Footwork style hip hop infused with lifts and cool choreography and they brought in hip hop dancers as back up dancers, not the usual pros from the show. Really fresh and fun to watch. Congratulations Iman and Daniella
It was a decent finale, and I agreed with the results in exact order.
Pretty much every freestyle dance is going to get all 10s unless somebody trips and falls, so the judges are even more irrelevant than usual. I’m still not sure why the voting fans carried bland Cody and blander Amanda to the finals, but at least they got it right last night.
I wouldn’t have been mad if Iman and Jojo had been flipped. Based on overall dance quality throughout the season, you could make a good argument for Jojo. But based on just the finale performances, as well as the evolution of someone with zero dance experience, it was Iman all the way.
The show itself really dragged in spots, though. With only about 24 minutes of actual dancing in a 2-hour broadcast, of course you get a lot of filler. Without the energy of a live crowd, and without their big backup troupe, and without opening it up to the outdoors like they sometimes do, they just couldn’t fill all that time in an interesting way. The video packages seemed even more bloated and emotionally manipulative than usual, and not one, but two eliminated contestants sang mediocre songs. Big yawn on most of it.
I have to say that the biggest props of the season go to Daniella. She showed herself to be an amazing choreographer and clearly a great teacher. The height difference demanded creativity and imagination, and she came through in spades. Great job!
“Emotionally manipulative” is a great way to put it. I ask my wife why it is that every contestant seems to have some type of sob story in a “reality” TV show that is supposed to rely on technical and artistic skills in a fair competition. I know it’s a rhetorical question.
But I do think it gives some advantage to the actors…I mean Melora Hardin blubbering about what an honor it was to be on the show and how much she wanted to win…had me going for a minute, but come on already.
Finals recap.
0:00 Title. Logo. Close-up eye shots of the finallists accompanied by the usual grow-as-a-person stuff. Then we get to the best part of every season, the female pros strutting their stuff in shiny low-quantity fabric body line-displaying outfits. I’d include the men in this assessment except that they’re all in dumpy boring black full-body uniforms. They look like goth janitors. Seriously, does anyone like these?
0:01 Somebody does a tumbling run. I’d like to think it’s Suni Lee because I still think she deserves to be here.
0:03 Tyra Banks very annoyingly runs her mouth off. Will spare you all the other instances of this because that’s going to freaking double the size of this recap.
0:05 Loud profile and Meaningless Exhibition #1 for Amanda Klootz. (Incidentally the ME1s are “fusion” dances due to the show heating up to several million degrees from the pace it’s been going.) She spins and flexes and glides. Whaddya want.
0:17 Insincere weepy profile and Meaningless Exhibition #1 for Cody Rigsby. He walks on his knees a bit before doing a few lurching steps and flexes. Still not buying this guy.
0:27 Pageant-style “I’m a WOMAN now!” profile and Meaningless Exhibition #1 for Jojo Siwa. I cannot emphasize enough how fabulous she and Jenna look when they’re not forced to wear goddam men’s suits or horror movie costumes. I’m going to go on YouTube and download all the performances where they look as great as they do tonight (which should about, oh, a minute), and that will be my positive memory of this season. She does a bunch of things and looks happy and energetic.
(I already know she’s not going to win because this show can’t have anything good, so no need to throw that particular bucket of water on me.)
0:37 Obligatory go-through-the-motions zero-humor sketch…Bachelorette-style smack talk or something (thanks for nothing, Kaitlin Bristowe)…followed by a few remote-location words with Derek Hough. I used to be a bit ambivalent on his Tiger Woods-ization, but he seems nice enough, so if we can’t have Tom Bergeron we may as well have him.
0:39 Aw-shucks profile and Meaningless Exhibition #1 for Iman Shumpert. If nothing else, he’s the quietest contestant we’ve had all season. He…reminds me of Nelly, to be honest, and probably deserves to end up in the same place.
0:50 Parody of the movie Rocky, which is something that’s extremely topical in 2021. Just be grateful it wasn’t Raging Bull or whatever.
0:51 Spice Girl That’s Not Melanie B does Bland Pop Number That’s Definitely Not As Good As What Nelly Did.
1:00 And apparently this show got tired of butchering good songs from the 80’s and decided to turn its wood chippers on fun songs from the 80’s. Tonight we get a pro exhibition (with one half very notably still overdressed) set to Pour Some Sugar On Me reimagined as a third rate country rock cheese-a-rama.
(Q: What has nine arms and sucks? A: Tyra Banks, Len Goodman, Bruno Tonioli, Carrie Ann Inaba, and the crane they need to drag this show out of the abyss. 
)
1:02 Profiles and Meaningless Exhibition #2 for Rigsby who…puts on loud colors and does his own thing for a few seconds before completely hamming it up? Wow, didn’t see that coming! It looks like he borrowed a page from Bristol Palin and Kel Mitchell! I don’t know if that’s a good thing, but it’s certainly a different thing! 
1:12/1:22/1:35 Aaaaaand I knew it was too different to last. 
1:46 Go-through-the-motions zero humor sketch about litigation or whatever. Points off for no Phoenix Wright-style “Objection!”, which was the only thing might have brought the mileage to “worth it” down to single figures.
1:47 Jimmy Allen doing a song in a hideously overrated, overexposed genre that just irritates the crap out of me at this point. Sheesh, I know not everyone’s up for gangsta rap, but there is a spectrum! 
1:56 Hey, just because you only have four minutes left doesn’t mean you should be afraid to waste time on weepy postmortem fluff.
1:59 Fourth, perhaps predictably, is Amanda Klootz. Third is…Cody Rigsby? 
The problem with absolutely no vote totals released ever…well…
OKAY, TIME OUT - Seriously, think about it. It has been thirty seasons and not only has there not been one leak, anywhere, at any time, ever, no one even seems to be trying! That is frankly a bit mind-blowing. Heck, Manti Teo gets roped into some infantile prank and ESPN spends months fanatically trying to find anything that might be construed as dirt.
…is that if someone makes it to the final without ever flirting with disaster, you don’t know if he’s super-bulletproof or just bulletproof enough to make the final but not win. He’s a lot like Josh Blue in the most recent America’s Got Talent. His following was powerful enough that he never had to sweat a judges’ decision, but when it came time to crown THE WINNER, he just didn’t have enough. He finished third too, BTW. 
All right, so now… 
This sucks.
Just so we’re clear, I’m not upset that Iman Shumpert won. He’s both humble and quiet, and that counts for a lot with me. I’m upset that Jojo Siwa finished second. Second place is the giant middle finger of reality TV. You work your tail off, you grow, you learn, you go the distance, and one micron from the grand prize it’s snatched away and you get JUMPING JACK CRAP. Okay, granted the real reward for her will be the avenues this opens up (Klootz and Rigsby already have lucrative jobs and Shumpert is retired, so they’re not getting any career boost), so she shouldn’t feel too bummed. But dammit, America, you had the chance to make a bigtime statement here, to show that you could do the right thing, honor the courage, groundbreaking young hope who’s also stunningly beautiful and a great dancer, and you gave her FRICKING SECOND.
I’m done. No, this time I’m dead serious. This is the end for me. I’ll just switch on the Golf Channel from now on. Heck, I do that most days anyway.
Wheelz - My two distinctions are who I think deserves to win and who I’d be okay with winning. Nelly was a perfect example of the latter case. He certainly didn’t deserve to win…he never had the fluidity or energy of Justina Machado, much less Nev Schulman or Kaitlin Bristowe…but he was incredibly pleasant and brought a lot to the show. Hell, I’d go so far as to say that him winning would’ve left the show with a brighter future than maintaining the Bachelorette Hegemony. On the flip side, Kristi Yamaguchi absolutely deserved to win, but I wasn’t thrilled about her steamrolling past a completely hapless field. Having a ringer isn’t the worst idea, but it shouldn’t be a complete curbstomp. If there was some way to deny her the Mirrorball Trophy while giving her something different to acknowledge her greatness (hah, yeah, right), I’d go for it in a heartbeat. That’s why I put Rigsby a half step…okay, a quarter step…all right, definitely at least a tenth of a step above Bones. Neither deserved it, but “no personality” beats “lousy personality” any day.
As far as misguided voting blocs go, though, the eternal mystery is where did all this support for Iman Shumpert come from? I don’t ever remember him being mentioned even once on Sportscenter. I thought he had about as much chance as the Kansas City Chiefs’ third string quarterback or the world #10 cornhole player of winning it all.
Kelby - Welcome to reality TV. That stuff is endemic nowadays. Go check out American Ninja Warrior sometime.
I am not a person who calls in votes to reality TV shows, so I’m not certain what’s in the minds of those who do. But I suspect it’s quite a mixed bag.
Some probably watch the dancing carefully and fancy themselves sitting alongside the judges, voting for whomever they actually feel was the best dancer that week.
Some will vote for their favorite celebrity come hell or high water, which gives a boost to those with larger fan bases regardless of their performance.
Others may vote for the most improved, or the personality they like best, or are suckers for the sob story of the week. Still others might be loyal to a particular pro dancer.
And then I’m sure there are the Agents of Chaos, who intentionally vote for the worst dancers just to shake things up.
Given all this, they might as well pick the winner’s name out of a hat for some seasons.