It’s 2020 and after voluntary reprogramming, you have no idea what happened in politics the last four years, but judging by the major party tickets, things got interesting. Incumbents, third parties, and write-ins were temporarily suspended from the ballot, so there are only the two (vaguely altered) major parties to choose from. (Trying to remember what the two major parties used to be like somehow causes a shock directly in your brain.)
The Retroblican Party nominated Paul Ryan.
The Neo-Democratic Party nominated Bill Weld.
Shut up and vote, shit happened, okay? Did I mention that voting is now compulsory and griping about the two choices is penalized by memory restoration and Trump guard duty?
That’s an incredibly easy choice – Weld. There are very few politicians I’d vote for Ryan over – Trump is one, and Cruz is another, but it’s hard to think of a third. Ryan is a cowardly and unprincipled weasel, in addition to being a supply-side nut.
Right, then! After you’ve finished beating your head against the wall, that’ll be a full month on guard duty for you. Report to the waterboarding/enema room, he’s been trying to take the easy way out and the Supreme Court gave very specific orders on what to do.
Grab a mop, a bucket, and some air freshener and go relieve **QSH. **You’re lucky Justice Obama didn’t hear you say that, he credits Weld with negotiating the meeting where all the “reality adjustments” and currents terms were unanimously agreed upon by all concerned.
Ryan comes across to me as a genuinely nice person. It could be an act, but I really want to like him. The problem is that the “Ryan tax plan” is a disaster. I don’t understand how anyone can argue that it would work unless maybe you paired it with measures to cut most pass-through funding to states and gave the states time to overhaul their own tax codes to raise the money at a local level. (Which, honestly, I would prefer, but it would be extraordinarily disruptive and I don’t think voters would understand it well enough to cooperate. And if you did all that, it wouldn’t really be a tax cut after all, just a change in how money is collected and allocated.) After the 2012 and 2016 primaries, I’m ultimately convinced that if he moderated his positions enough to appeal to me, he’d never make it through a GOP primary.
Of course, I don’t know much about Weld except what I saw on CNN’s Libertarian town hall. He seems like someone who’s too reasonable to be running as a Libertarian and he’s certainly too qualified to be Johnson’s VP. You could say that I’m inherently distrustful, but haven’t seen anything bad yet.
Yeah, that fits with what I know of him, but we don’t know if there are skeletons in his closet. I mean, he might have sacrificed kittens to Satan or even had his own email server.
Heh, yeah. And even though I’ve included him in my two zany polls (one where he’s the R-nominee and one where he’s the D), I don’t want anyone to get the impression that I’m endorsing him or that he’d be my personal first choice. Lately, I’ve just been surveying the political landscape noting all the absurdities and considering the potential compromises that might be possible among a “coalition of the reasonable” from across the political spectrum that might just emerge from all this.
These days, I know people may find this a bit ridiculous, but I’m starting to get optimistic that things will soon probably just get a little bit worse before they start to get a whole lot better. Even more ridiculous still, it may just be this shark-jumping Trump chump that was the necessary catalyst. :eek: Either that, or we’re all gonna soon die miserably, I’m not sure which.
