Emergency Mexican Cheese Dip Advice Needed!

So, the wifey and I are supposed to be bringing the dip to our Mexican themed get together with friends tonight. She worked last night, and was going to make it after she woke up. She overslept, then had to run the kids to their swim classes as soon as I got home. This leaves me as the dip…er…with the dip!

Here’s what I know:

Nothing.

Here’s what I have:

A block of Asiago and Fontinella.

Shredded Mozzarella, Sharp, and Colby.

Sour Cream.

Taco Bell sauce.

I can’t think of anything else I would need.

Please advise as to what ingredients would be the best combination, and also how I should go about making this stuff. I am completely lost in the kitchen.

Thanks!

THe simplest “Mexican Cheese Dip” I can think of is actually very easy:

You need:
One small loaf of Velveeta (The Cheeze That Cannot Die)
One jar salsa (Heat to taste)
Milk

In a sauce pan over low heat, melt the Velveeta. Add the salsa. Add milk to keep the sauce dipable once it cools down.

Since it sounds like you’re in a pinch, I suppose you could add the colby, sharp, and shredded mozzarella in a 2:1:1 ratio. Use the milk to keep the mixture at a thick liquid state.

Good luck.

Thanks, but the only problem is that I can’t just run to the store right now. I have no car!

I need something that will work with the ingredients on hand, if that is possible.

Ok, on further review of you post, I see that you added the “in a pinch” part, thanks!

Spackle:
1 package mexican velveeta
1 can Hormel chili (no beans)

a) Put together in a bowl.
b) nuke
c) mix
d) repeat steps b + c until dip is mixed well.

mix needs periodic re-nuking.


With what you have, I’d shred the non shreded cheese, then mix all ingrediants (cheese, sour cream, sauce) in a bowl.

Brian

Also, how much milk should I add?

You could make a fondue/rarebit type thing, if you have some beer.

  1. Toss shredded cheese with a few tablespoons of cornstarch.
  2. Heat beer in a saucepan until small bubble form.
  3. Add cheese in handfulls, stirring after each addition.
  4. When smooth and thick enough, add hot sauce to taste.

Skip the sour cream or serve on the side. This will have to be kept warm.

No Beer on hand.

Let me add that I would like to actually impress the female Rancid when she gets home with something edible.

The problem is that regular cheese doesn’t melt well without the aid of alcohol. (So true for many of us.) I think, in your place I would take a nice empty, microwaveable bowl and buy the ingredients for the Velveeta a salsa dip on the way to the party. It only takes a couple of minutes to throw together.

One more idea, on the outside chance you have a can of chili or refried beans in your cupboard:

In a casserole dish layer chili, sour cream, hot sauce, and shredded cheese. Bake or microwave until heated through.

Do you have rice or chicken on hand? I’m almost certain you have some crappy Uncle Bens in the back of your cupboard.

The best layered dip is made using either spicy rice or spicy chicken, here’s how to make both:

Bring 1 cup of taco bell sauce and 1 cup of water to a boil in a pot. Add 1 cup of rice, cover, and reduce to a simmer. Let it cook on extrememly low eat for about 20min. At that point the rice should be cooked and have absorbed all of the water. If the rice is uncooked add a bit more water and let it keep cooking; conversely if there is liquid left and the rice is almost done, bring it up to a boil (uncovered) and cook off the liquid.

If you have chicken, cut it into chunks and add it to the boiling water/sauce mixture (with or without the rice). Cover and reduce the temp to let it simmer until almost all of the liquid is gone. In this case though, you don’t want to start with too much liquid (takes longer to evaporate) so adjust depending on the amount of chicken, you can always add more if it starts to run try. When the liquid is almost gone, the chicken will be cooked, and should shred easily. Take a fork and shred the chicken pieces.

For the layered dip, spread the chicken or rice in the bottom of a large brownie pan or a deep pie plate (depending on how much you’ve made). Top it with sour cream, then cheese, then sprinkle with green onions, chopped tomatoes, small chilis or jalapenos.

Note: I wouldn’t use the asiago or Fontinella, they just won’t taste right. Shred the cheddar and colby finely, mix, then sprinkle over the sour cream.

For those reading, this is made even better if your bottom layer is refried beans and a middle layer is quacamole.

Let me know how it turns out.

Rancid, please don’t use Velveeta, its crap. You already have lots of good cheese on hand.

In the slim chance that you have (or have access to) cream cheese, try to following:

In a blender mix softened cream cheese, with half* as much milk and half as much mayo and just a little bit of lemon juice. That will be your base.

Blend in grated chedder and colby, then work in the taco bell sauce a little at a time until you have the taste you’re looking for. Keep mixing to make it soft enough to dip chips in.

*If you use 1cup of cream cheese, use 1/2cup milk and 1/2cup mayo.

Let’s say she can’t get velvita, will the following work:

  1. “whoops, I burnt the cheese dip, sorry, someone will just have to run to the store.”

  2. Throw together all the cheese, spices, and some oil. Microwave till the cheese is runny, then and more oil and some chunky vegetable stuff to break up the texture. When it starts to solidify, microwavve it again.

Alright, I think I can do this. I have these ingredients (sorry, but no rice or chili), and it sounds easy enough for a monkey. Thanks so much for all your help, it came just in time. Check back soon in case I screw something up.

Does cream cheese go bad?

Eventually. Check the date. Its made with heavily pasturized milk so it should last a while, but tends to dry out.

Ok, it seems a little thin. No more cream cheese, so should I try to thicken it up with something else?

Thanks so much for all of your help everyone. Leaving in about 15 minutes or so…

Also, how about raw starch mixxed with spices. That thickens up gravy.

How thin? You don’t want it drippy, it should be just thicker than sour cream, but not as gelatenous as mayo. If its drippy, “fold” in a little more mayo (using a spatula), tasting as you go. But before you do (and you’ll love this) dip a chip into it so see how drippy it is. You wan it to stick to the chip without falling off, but also not so hard that the chip breaks. It might firm up if you can refrigerate it.