Which has made me instaiably curious. How does one end up officially going to Hell? Does it involve a conversation with the Dark Prince himself? Or a formal invitation? If so, what does Satan’s stationary look like (impressively firey? understated and black?)? I mean, I’ve been told that I’m going to Hell, but I had no idea there was any way to make it official before death. Is there an application process, or do you have to be caught?
you don’t know HOW right youare… 
Oh! Can I go? Can I go? Pretty please? My life feels like I’m staring down the barrel of a gun with no options but a nice dark abyss of depression, hell seems fun in comparison. So Ender, can I be invited?
Kitty
Kitty… 
The Pope told him.
Right after Enderw23 turned over the jack of spades. The Pope leapt from his stool and called Ender a cheat and refused to pay up. Ender smashed the bottle of Wild Turkey they had been swigging from and brandished it as The Pope fumbled around the folds of his robe. Just in time, The Pope remembered he’d put his cash under his miter for safe keeping.
Handing over the money, The Pope leaned over and spoke low so the showgirls couldn’t hear. “That’s it. It’s official. You’re going to Hell.”
::looks reprovingly, if sympathetically, at Kitty::
Now I can understand wanting to come along (it is Hell, after all), but we’ve gotta work on that abyss of darkness thing. That won’t do at all.
{{Kitty}}
But it sounds so poetic doesn’t it? I write my best stuff when I can’t see through the haze of tears. But does that mean I can come along?
Kitty
Look, what’s the problem here? The only way that a purportedly human being can be so funny is by having sold his soul to the Devil. Now, we know that’s all well and fine, but this son-of-a-buck is definitly headed for H-E-Double-Toothpicks. Personally, I can deal with that fact because it means that I’ll have good company.
Any questions?
Well I do believe this is my 500th post. Woohoo! I’m not a newbie any more. Yet I can’t even be happy about it, so Zenster can you at least cheer me up a little bit and tell me I can join the rest of you in hell? Pretty please?
Kitty
Looks like some of you need the good ol’ blowjob smiley! :o