Orian Slave Girls Want You!
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Aw, Mongo straight!
Howard Johnson’s right!
Blow it out your ass, Howard.
He hit Buddy!
Get him, girls!
Blazing Saddles
“…you’re doing the French Mistake!”
"Kn*ckers, this is your last warning before we call the police - stop stalking George Stephanopoulos."
rofl.
I don’t know, Kn*ckers, maybe that last one wasn’t spam. Poor George Stephanopoulos 
“'Scuse me while I whip this out.”
my PHASER, you naughties.
Q. How do you make a moron waste time?
A. Get them to click on a link to a site that doesn’t exist!
:rolleyes:
Where all the white Klingons at?
Hey!
Someone gonna pull up this episode’s thread?
Is “pulling on” a thread as bad as 'jacking it? 
The “Precious Cargo” thread is somewhere in the CS forum…Must have fallen down to page 2 or 3 by now, but it was just up yesterday. I supposed you want me to go and bump it now. Sheet, do I have to do everything?
Okay, I will!
“Porthos only pawn in game of water polo.”
Prawn…
Oh. Well, I just replied with “Unsubscribe” in the subject line, then deleted it…
Now I suppose you’re going to tell me that those “Quit stealing my cats!” messages my neighbor sends me aren’t just stupid chain letter forwards.
And welcome to the SDMB, OptiHut! Have a cookie.
kn(*)ckers, could you steal some of Mrs. Plant’s dogs?
I’m surprised you didn’t just eat them. What with the carnivorousnes and all.
INT. CAPTAIN’S MESS
Archer sits alone at the table. Still visibly upset about the recent Spotted Dick incident, Chef enters with a covered tray, takes the lid off and sets the sausage links in front of Archer.
Archer (furrows brow, looks pensively at plate*): This smells funny. What kind of meat is this?
Chef: A new kind, Captain.
Archer: But we haven’t been to any new planets lately–at least, not any with meat available. Did something go wrong with the protein resequencer?
Chef: No, sir. Nothing. I didn’t even use that device. This is from scratch.
Archer furrows at the plate again.
Archer: Umm, could I maybe have a salad instead?
Chef: Sorry, sir. No salad left. By the way, Captain, did you ever see the 1989 movie The War of The Roses?
Archer’s eyes widen.
Archer: Yes. Why do you ask…Oh, Chef…no…You didn’t…
Chef leans in close.
Chef: Woof.
*per Carni’s previous instructions about writing Archer scenes