In the spirit of the redundancies thread. Some of our favority (or possibly most hated) euphemisms:
Junk mail = Direct marketing correspondence
Truck stop = Travel plaza
Manicurist = Nail technician
Drought = Water defecit situation
I used to have a whole list of these from George Carlin, who is well known for being disgusted by ridiculous PC phrases. I’ll have lots more to add if I can come up with it.
Recent polls revealed that some people have never been polled, until recently.
rerun = “encore presentation”
more to come…
Dead = Passed Away
Janitor = Environmental Service Technician
Ugly = Nice (heheh, not really a euphemism, but you know what I mean.)
No, silly…
Ugly=Wonderful personality.
promptly dons asbestos underwear
Ugly = “Aesthetically challenged”.
taxes = “contributions”
beggar/transient/bum = “homeless”
Friday night; drinkin’ the vino, padding the post count.
In real estate:
Adorable = small
Cute = Very small
Cozy = Slightly bigger than a doghouse
Close to amenities = Nearest store is 5 miles away
Lots of potential = Rundown
Recently renovated = In 1971
Fully landscaped = Has a lawn and a half dead tree.
Great view = Overlooking the highway
…in keeping with Wally’s theme:
Handyman’s Special or Fixer Upper = Turned down for use as a crack house
Anything “pre-owned”. Any command starting off with, “for your convenience/safety”.
You are right, Carlin has a huge list of them.
Fingerprinting: digital imaging
Nightclub: party space
Room Service: private dining
Uniforms: career apparel
Junkies: the user population
Cardboard Box: makeshift home
“I have a lot of good ideas, problem is most of them suck.” -George Carlin
Oh, oh, oh: “for your protection, we are videotaping the premises.”
Yeah, right. They’re trying to catch your ass.
Coffee mug = liquid-caffeine delivery system
In tribute to a blurb from TNT, when they decided to only show the first season of Crusade:
“A Special limited series”
You say “cheesy” like that’s a BAD thing.
We’ve got manny of 'em right here –
idiot - Bj0rn
slut - Heatherlee
ironic - UncleBeer
omnipotent - Cecil
flirtatious - kellibelli
smart - Doctor Jackson
assinine - valenta8
troll - Brithael
and of course;
: ) - Death Wish
“Though I hate 'em, I’ll defend to my death your right to use smilies.”
Forward deployed until 18AUG00
Fighter jet:
airborn weapons delivery platform,
I am not making this up
sugar= “concentrated cane juice”
first week not billed of minimum one-month subscription= “Free Porn!”
Troll = coherent-post challenged ? 
This is sort of related. I was pretty amused with what happened to the names of breakfast cereals a few years back, as Kellogg’s, Post, and the gang desperately tried to expunge the dreaded word “sugar”:
Sugar Pops --> Corn Pops
Sugar Smacks --> Honey Smacks
Sugar Frosted Flakes --> Frosted Flakes
How about:
Negative patient outcome–(he died)
Engaging the enemy on all sides–(we’re surrounded)