So I’m coming into work this morning and board the elevator. I work on the 2nd highest floor so I naturally move to the back of the elevator knowing that many people will get on and off before I reach my destination. There are 6 people in the elevator when I get on. We stop at the 3rd floor. 2 more people get on. Of course, the people in the front need to make room for the others so they step back slightly. I notice that the ass of the woman in front of me is now touching my thighs.
Most people would agree that it’s a rather large ass. Incidentally, I’m an admirer of largish butts on women, but this one greatly exceeds my limitations. But at this point, since it’s only really brushing my thighs I don’t think much of it.
On the 5th floor, 2 people get off and 2 get on. As everyone is repositioning themselves except me (since I’m already squeezed into the corner), the woman actually backs up further. I’m now at the point where the pressure on my thighs is causing pain. My knees feel like they’re about to buckle backwards. Besides that, there a handrail in the elevator that is pushing into the small of my back, which is also causing pain.
So, I’m thinking that 1 of 4 things is going on: 1) I’m invisible, 2) this woman is somehow pleasuring herself at my expense, 3) this poor woman has lost the sensation of touch in her ass, or 4) I’m on Candid Camera.
Ruling out choices 1 and 4, I do the natural thing. I push back (with my thighs on her butt). It was meant to be a non-verbal response saying: “Hello? Do you notice that your ass is cutting off the circulation to my feet?”. It was also meant to communicate my feelings without embarrassing her in any way. Think about it, if I had said something aloud, people on the elevator would’ve gazed at her ass. My goal wasn’t to have everyone focus on a body part that she may or may not be self-conscious about.
Not long after, she turns around, scowls, and says: “Excuse me!” in a very hostile manner. So I say: “You’re excused!” I was absolutely shocked that she had the nerve to implicitly blame me for what had just occurred. Now everyone else on the elevator probably thinks that it was I who did something perverted or unjust.
Finally, she gets off on the 11th Floor and looks directly at me and says: “Good bye!” also in a confrontational way. The door closes, and 6 hours later, I’m still wondering what the hell she was thinking.