I’ve been considering it.
I like dancing, I go out at least once a week dancing as it is, and I’ve been told I ‘should try it out, I’d make a good buck or two’
Anyone have anything to say about exotic dancing? Any experiences? I know of a couple at least on the boards that have done it, I was interested in what type of things I might expect to run into. On one hand, I keep hearing all the glamour stories about the life style, but I don’t want the lifestyle, I just want some extra cash so I can move out of my Hobbit Hole apartment into a place where I get more than 2 hours of sun a day, and for fun.
I’m not into drugs, I don’t drink, I don’t smoke…
I’ve heard that I would be sorrounded by these types of things as well, but I’m not so worried about it… should I be?
Plus, I’d like to hear any of your exotic dancing stories if you’ve got any…
Before I was a nice Catholic girl, I was an exotic dancer. Not full time, I, um, moonlighted on weekends while working in a music store warehouse during the week.
Yes you will be surrounded by drugs, among other things.
I worked in three strip bars in South Bend, Indiana, all owned by the same guy. If one bar was shorthanded, and another was overstaffed, girls would be asked to volunteer to work at the other bars. I didn’t make huge amounts of money, but it was definitely enough to pull me back from the edge of poverty to living comfortably. How much money you can make probably depends on where you live. In a small city, you might make a living, but not a killing. Here in Vegas, I hear stories of dancers making a grand a night.
I don’t know what the strip club scene is like elswhere in the country, but where I worked, it was actually pretty cool. The bartenders/bouncers (small place, the bartenders were huge and muscular) treated the girls with respect. It was really strange though. If they needed to tell one of the girls something while she was in the dressing room, they would just walk right in and talk to her. So, you’d be stark naked, and this guy would walk in and start talking to one of the girls, Hey, Breezy, so and so is trying to get hold of you, whatever, and they’d be looking at you, but they wouldn’t be looking at you. If a girl was really shy, and happened to be sans g-string, she might move one hand to cover the parts we weren’t legally allowed to show onstage in St. Joseph County, but that was about it. They were so used to seeing nearly-naked women, day after day after day it just didn’t do anything for them anymore, and we were so used to them seeing us, it didn’t bother us. One of them told me that what turned him on was being with someone special that he loved… Sweet guy.
Not that I’m trying to encourage you or anything. It’s a sin to arouse men’s lust by dancing naked in front of them for money, but that’s my experience.
Most people who recommend girls try “exotic dancing” get referal fees from the clubs. If you show up, they will get paid. Just know while they are flattering you about your great body, they are trying to make money for themselves.
I would guess that dancing on a stage by yourself is different than dacing with other people, like you do when you go out dancing, so it may not be “fun”.
The dancers I know all smoke, drink and use drugs. Most need the drinks and drugs to dance.
If you want to try it, go ahead. If you don’t like it, stop. OK, the easy money will make it hard to stop, but the drinks and drugs will make it tolerable. The same is true of many other jobs.
Fun? Nah.
You have a certain amount of drinks you must get bought for you. Its like playing beat the clock. And you can’t ask for them.
Then there are the customers, some of whom are wonderful conversationalists.
Others, well, find out yourself.
Find a good bar with a good reputation in a fairly good section of town.
I didn’t drink smoke or take drugs either. But you’ll be in the minority.
How will such a turn in your life affect the way you see things?
Its possible to stay true to yourself and not get into drugs etc etc but will YOU be able to stay away from them?
Will it affect the way you look upon having sex and relationships in general?
Its not my intention to to talk you in or out of it.That is entirely up to you (you are an adult are you?)
I just think that you should really really ask youself some fundamental questions befor you even consider this.
<concerned daddy mode>
If you ask me for a straightforeward answer i’d say
Please don’t !
If youre young enough to work as an exotic dancer than your whole life and regular career options are AHEAD of you.
</concerned daddy mode>
and I worked in a couple of clubs way back when. I still frequent a local place that I find friendly and acceptable.
The lifestyle is typically that of fast-paced, drug accessable,lots of booze, and centered on sex. It’s up to you to determine what you want out of it. I know a number of dancers that have small children and this is the best way for them to make good money and have “flex time”. I know some who are students, and this also makes the most money for the time, and fits the school schedule. Some have degrees, but still make better money from dancing than their career field.
I would advise you to ask around for opinions on the best club to work, and have a male friend take you there for a look before committing to dance. You will need to determine if you have what it takes to separate the money from the patron if you want to make as much as possible. IMO, the clients in most clubs are 30%- “I’m gonna try to get laid here”, 40%- “cheap ass lookey-loos” and 40%- " I’m in here to have a good time and will pay for it"
I fall into the small catagory of have a few beers and tip the runway gals, and talk to my friends. In and out in an hour and spend $20-25, no personal dances. (that’s where the money is). Most of the ladies have regular customers they depend on to get their money, some of the men are quite happy to just have them sit and talk, and will pay well just for the attention.
Hope that helps a bit, anymore info just ask.
It all depends on what gets you there in the first place. Are you doing it to advance yourself in something else? Or are you doing it because you don’t feel you have anything else to offer people but your looks?
Well balanced and knowledgable? You’ll probably do alright.
Unstable and troubled? Drugs and the trappings of the gig will get to you eventually.
At least that’s the case with people I’ve known in the biz.
If you’re really unsure and want a taste of what it’ll bring, go to a club that offers amatuer night and try it out. You can either stop at some point in the night if it’s shady, or, if you like it, keep on going.
I’d suggest that if you feel this is the job for you that you try out amatuer nights at other bars in town until you find one that fits your needs.
If your good, they’ll probably hire you on the spot or advise you where they get their dancers from- some are ‘farmed’ out from a service to the bars.
Hmmm. I don’t know why I assumed you were a gal, but out of curiosity I checked the SDPP and, well… your a guy.
Obvious to you, but not to me.
Anyhoo, I haven’t the foggiest what options there are for guys. About all I know in this area of the biz is that the typical customers are either gay or bi.
No clue if that’s your game or not, I really don’t care either way, but it’s about all I can add to this topic.
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by soulsling * I’ve been considering it. I like dancing, I go out at least once a week dancing as it is, and I’ve been told I ‘should try it out, I’d make a good buck or two’/quote]
You may be a very good dancer and good-looking to boot, but one doesn’t have to be anything special to hear this.
**
Let’s see. Pressure to keep your weight within acceptable limits for the bar. The bar owner insisting on keeping the dancers working in winter while the heat’s out and only three desperate guys are in the audience. (The dancers got to keep their coats on–but had to wear them open.) Possibly being asked to prostitute yourself for clothes, jewels, or money in your off time. Not asked by the bar owners, but by the customers.
You probably won’t have too much trouble with really drunk guys groping you, since bouncers take a dim view of that. Depending on the state you live in, you may not be able to do all the same moves while you’re dancing onstage that you do while dancing for yourself. For example, in some states, it’s unlawful for dancers to touch themselves at all–even, say, putting their hands on their wrists.
Good, because it’s not very glamourous.
Do it for the money. I wouldn’t do it for fun.
The answer depends on how much you dislike seeing people who are drunk, smoking, and may be using drugs. (While I guess some places have a two-drink minumum, the place I knew wouldn’t allow the dancers to work if they had obviously been drinking. Not all dancers drug, either.) While you’re pondering that, ponder this: it’s also not really an environment conducive to having a good opinion of men, since the men you’re apt to be spending time with at work are not going to be behaving well. (I just previewed and saw that you’re a guy, but I can’t imagine that this would change.)
Dancing isn’t the kiss of death and it’s possible to do it for a while to make some extra money, but I wouldn’t recommend doing it for long. I really wouldn’t recommend doing it for ideas of glamor or fun.
Well, I wondered about that, but decided I was wrong about the gender.
BTW, since you are a guy, you have to be a really good dancer. Smaller job pool and women aren’t as excited by just seeing a bare chest as men are The ones I used to go see were incredible dancers.
I have had several male and female friends who danced. They made fantastic money and stayed away from the shady side of the whole thing. The men did far better in gay bars than straight bars even though they were straight. They just didn’t let on as such to the clientele. If it isn’t an issue for you, I would recommend the same route (especially in NYC). Good luck to you, whatever you decide.
I am so sorry. I never even bothered to explain I’m a guy. I’m straight, and I’m 25. I live in New York City, and this is just something I have been seriously considering. I have actually visited a strip club in my neighborhood, girls don’t take off their clothes there though, not even topless. I was able to talk to the dancers and the manager of the place, they all recommended a bar in the village. It’s a gay bar, and supposedly, men don’t get completely nude either… not a problem for me either way.
Yes, I do need the cash to move out.
No, I don’t want to do this for a long time. I have a really good paying job, that anywhere else in the country would most likely have me able to have bought a home and car by now. This city is way overpriced.
I know it’s harder for guys to find places, or jobs to dance. Is the scene still the same? Drugs and all that? I’m not worried about being propositioned, I can laugh that off and refuse politely.
As for my dancing abilities, I’ll leave that for whoever I audition for to judge, and I don’t think the people telling me to dance are getting any kickbacks. These are all friends of mine, or people I see whenever I go out dancing on the weekends. My cousin’s have been telling me I could do it since I was in high school. I’m not so sure it’s my body, definitely not actually, but my dancing that made them say it.
Thanx for the advice though. I suppose since no guys on the boards have done it I really will have to see for myself…
Also, I’ve known several (female) exotic dancers and they didn’t have any higher rate of drug use, smoking, etc than would be expected for people in that economic class, i.e. lower income levels.
I assumed from the OP you were a woman also. I don’t have any personal experience about the world of male exotic dancers but here’s my two cents of advice.
You mentioned that drugs and alcohol are pervasive in clubs. True. But drugs and alcohol are pervasive on college campuses. Does that mean you shouldn’t attend Harvard because it’s an unhealthy enviroment? You should decide what kind of surroundings you can be comfortable in, but you don’t have to avoid a business just because of some of its worst points.
You should also keep in mind that the vast majority of clubs do not pay their dancers. The dancers make a living solely off the tips they earn (in some cases they even have to pay the club). This means you have to work the crowd to make money. I’ve never visited a male strip club but I have to assume that the majority of customers will be gay men. So ask yourself if you’ll be able to approach a strange man and say “Hi, I’m soulsling. Want a table dance?”
I have seen many male strippers in my time (stripping for women) and many clubs around here have ladies night where they bring in male strippers. I can assure you, they seem to rake in the tips!
In a joking way, I tell my SO that he should get into it, because the money seems to be pretty good.
I too saw you on the people pages. Make sure you wear the soldier uniform for your first night at the club. You’re guaranteed to be a hit…
Anyway, I had a roommate in college who was a male exotic dancer. Not in a club, but for a strip-o-gram type service. I think he saw an ad in a Reader-type weekly looking for dancers. He made o.k. money on tips, but gave it up within a few months, although I don’t recall exactly why.
Eft was on the money with one issue: keeping your appearance up. If you’re going to be a male dancer, you’re going to have to be pretty buff. If I recall, my roommate said his “audition” focused first on his body, and only secondarily on his dancing skill (which was only moderate). He was also expected to hit the gym frequently to keep in shape.
If I were you, I’d go to the club you’re thinking about and check it out for a while. You might even want to talk to some of the dancers and get a first-hand perspective from them. Also, some of the gay members of the Board, like Esprix, and matt_mcl, and SqrlClub might have ideas about the atmosphere in these kinds of clubs. If you’re going to be dancing primarily for gay men, you’re going to want to learn a lot about what makes them tick, not only for safety reasons, but also to enable you to maximize your tips.
There is a long auto-biographical article, in the Metro (San Joses weekly “alternative” paper), about a guy who danced. I know metro can be found on-line, and you should read it.
There is not a lot of work for male “exotic” dancers 9outside of gay clubs), but you could work as a dancer in the leather club scene, which that guy did. Or, if you can really shake your booty, get a job as a “strip-o-gram” dancer. Sometimes you get to dance for some very hot 20’s girls, who are doing a pre-wedding thing. Of course, sometimes you gotta dance for a group of senior citizens.
Whenever I go Exotic Dancing, I get the most compliments for the depth of my navel. The ladies really dig it when they can insert their index finger all the way up to the third knuckle. They say it shows virility.
Of course, I always make sure to lubricate myself with copious amounts of vaseline. It really makes the dryer lint adhere to my rotund belly.
The laides especially like the way the G-string I wear is so tight. The strings of it dig into the massive amounts of fat around my waist, and the flesh cascades over them so that they’re invisible. All they can see is the elephant-nosed patch of fabric up front, and the butt-hair sticking out all willy-nilly in the rear.
The ones I used to go see were incredible dancers.