I wanted to do this as a poll, but there are far too many variants. Let’s try it as a regular thread.
I expect most of us have been invited to at least a few momentous events in the lives of our relatives. Which do you not dare miss? Which do you consider, depending on cost/time of year/distance/closeness of relative? Which are you likely to decline?
I put weddings and funerals of the immediate family (including grandparents) at the top of the do-not-miss list. I did miss one sister’s wedding, but there was a convoluted backstory to that fiasco. I didn’t accompany my husband to either of his grandmothers’ funerals due to financial, work, and kid-in-school constraints. He missed my 2nd sister’s wedding and my grandmother’s funeral because he couldn’t get time off work for the travel and the event. Funerals for aunts, uncles, or cousins are highly distance dependent, so I’ve missed most of those.
I really hate showers. I went to one for a cousin (I was about 10) because I was in her wedding. I don’t think I went to any for my sibs - we lived 800 miles away for a lot of years. My niece is getting married in July and I’m feeling obligated to attend her shower, and I’m dreading it already. I’m not really looking forward to the wedding either but we’ll attend. They should just elope like we did!
My folks had big to-do parties for their 25th and 50th anniversaries, and I was at both. My husband and I pretty much ignore our anniversaries other than going out to dinner, and I kinda take that same outlook regarding my sibs’ anniversaries.
Graduations are to be avoided unless there’s no escape. So far, I’ve been spared all but my daughter’s and my niece’s.
Christenings were never an issue - we lived too far away and weren’t invited.
Birthday parties are iffy, but we mostly don’t bother. Even tho we’re in the same state as my family now, we’re 2 hours away from most of them and we’re tired of always doing the driving. We’ve quit inviting anyone to our place because all they do is bitch about the drive…
Random parties - no feeling of obligation - they’re decided on individual merits.
Next?