Favorite Board One-Liners or Exchanges

Probably my single favorite thing about the Boards is how funny people are. Sometimes it seems like too much trouble, or distracting to the thread ,to post just to say “HA!”, but damn, some funny stuff gets said here. So here are a couple recent exchanges that have made me LOL, with posters identified so they can take a bow if they want. Who or what in our demented little crew has made you laugh lately?

From here.

ANAAMIKA: “Talk to my SO, who has the most American, patriotic name around.”
CERVAISE: “Lincoln McPieflag?”

From here.

RICKJAY: “Countdown: just 9 days to ‘Snakes On A Plane’”
JTHUNDER: “‘Snakes On A Plane’? What’s it about?”

HA! :slight_smile:

Hee! One of my comments made it in, even though I was only the one setting it up. I’ll come up with some, but I had to say - Cervaise’s comment cracked me up, then cracked my SO up, too.

Everyone says you give great straightline. :slight_smile:

OK, I’m reviving this because I just couldn’t let such wittiness pass unnoticed!

In response to Winston Smith’s pledge to return to caveman ways, we get this gem from Smeghead:

:smiley:

:cool:

JThunder’s SoaP post also made me pee myself a little.

I really like the exchange in How do I keep IE from automatically chenging the text size?.

It has to be one of the best mod responses ever.

Podkayne, in a thread about stupid things we’d all done recently:

“Somewhere in the dim recesses of my overtaxed brain, a lone synapse bravely sparked.”

Link

Qadgop, most likely, in a thread about LOTR, discusses whether Gandalf really had magical skills. “It’s not like the book said ‘And then Gandalf casts a spell.’”

That was nostril-milk worthy.

The first time I saw the phrase “We’ve secretly replaced [poster x]'s Cheerios with crack cocaine. Let’s see if he notices” made me laugh and giggle and then giggle at random moments throughout the day. It was in response to a particularly random crazy outburst, and the timing was just perfect, and it was the first time I’d seen it on a message board.

I’ve seen it many, many times since, but it’s not been nearly as funny (and sometimes just seems likely desperately reaching for the funny).

“Fucko Off!” is still pretty funny.

I thought of two:

In a thread about the ideal funeral, Wild Bill posted he wanted a sign mounted by his corpse, saying, "Gotcha ya!"Typo, of course. But Eve caught it.

And one I did but someone else noticed, when I said something like “of course McDonald’s shakes have milk in them. It would be such a scandal if not. It’d be like the French Fries fried in beef fat and the Hindus.”
And someone said, “They fry French Fries in beef fat and Hindus? How do they keep it so cheap?”

Made me laugh.

I think it’s gone now, but elucidator has as many great one-liners----nay, I say he has the most on the board.

I’m searching for the (paraphrasing, perhaps) " If you ain’t had any librarian noggin then you don’t know what you’re missing."

He continually cracks me up.

Another from 'Luci’s Greatest Hits:

In the Florida Pubbies Push Harris Under the Bus! thread:

BrainGlutton:“From what I know of Harris, it’s shoe that fits like she’s been wearing it five years.”
elucidator:“Ruby. Belonged to her sister.”

It took me five minutes to catch my breath.

:cool: Your patriotic post was darned funny too.

I still giggle about Giraffe’s exchange with Hot Buttered Toast in this thread: How a dangerous situation was defused by the wonders of toast - Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share - Straight Dope Message Board.

ANAAMIKA, I agree, but EVE’s response to WILDEST BILL’s post is a true board classic that deserve to be reposted. The thread is here.

WILDEST BILL said “I really don’t want to have a boring funeral like everybody else has. . . . I want the morgue dudes to put me in a cool looking suit and put a big like smile on my face. Then I want them too arrange my hand like a gun so when people lean over and look I’ll be saying ‘Gotcha Ya’.” Catching BILL’s unintended typo, EVE posted:

“What’s your favorite …?” threads belong in IMHO.

I’ll move this for you.

Cajun Man
for the SDMB

The triple-play between cerberus, Foldup Rabbit and Caught@Work in this thread made me laugh.

Walter Windchill in the very hot right now BBQ JonBenet Ramsey thread:

Followed up by PriceGuy

I liked gazpacho’s assist to dogbutler’s response in this thread to a new poster who seemed like he was looking for serious answers.