Inspired by this thread. Any posters keen to find out if their real-world stats would help them last five minutes in a D&D campaign are invited to sign up here. The first half-dozen in the thread will be the initial adventuring party - any more volunteers can wait their turn in the tavern to replace the possible fatalities… 
The Fighting Ignorants is the last-chance saloon for all those under-talented souls who were laughed out of the Wizards’ Tower, booted out of the Barracks, quietly slid out of the Thieves’ Guild and voted not worth a prayer by the General Synod. Inevitably, they number few rangers, druids or illusionists in their ranks, and all monks, paladins and bards are prohibited by the FI’s rulebook. Most of them are humans - 1st Ed rules on racial minima tend to rule out most of the demi-human races - and all of them tend to wear an air of quiet desperation. But the dream still lives on - power, prestige, wealth, and maybe, just maybe, enough magic items to mask their fearful ordinariness…
We’re playing by First Edition rules? Sigh. Don’t know those rules for character creation, unfortunately.
No trouble, I will help you out all you need. According to your post you have:
You meet the minimum ability score requirements for any race and any of the basic four character classes (cleric, fighter, mage, thief), none of the special ones. Your dexterity would impose penalties to thief skills, your wisdom would entail a 10% chance of failing to cast clerical spells, your intelligence would allow maximum 5th level mage spells (if you survived that long) and only a 45% chance to learn any spell. I need hardly say that none of your scores confer any benefit whatever, so pick a class and have at it! Bear in mind that dwarves receive +1 con/-1 cha, elves +1 dex/-1 cha, halflings +1 dex/-1 str, half-orcs +1 str/+1 con/-2 cha - none of which do you much good. Demi-humans generally have infravision and some resistances, half-orcs have the least benefit (they work best when those stat +1s actually do something).
If you wish to tell me what you’d like to be, I’ll take it from there.
This seems like a fun idea.
Strength: 13. I’m no body builder but I do try to keep fit, plus I’m big.
Dexterity: 9. What’s average on 3d6? My gut says about 10. I’m 42, and never been all that agile-- plus a back injury, so below average.
Constitution: 12. I’m healthy as in I rarely miss a day of work plus I walk a lot. Still, 42.
Intelligence: 15. I’m going off the ol’ bell curve here-- plus I’m clever enough that people remark on it. No genius, possibly mad scientist material.
Wisdom: 8. I’m smart but not rich, and I’ve had legal troubles. Plus I’m a games addict and like booze.
Charisma: 10. Mom says I’m handsome, but I’m an introvert and don’t really like people. Hopefully it balance out.
Dave Hartwick, you could be a fighter, mage or (very inept) thief. As a mage you actually have a 65% chance to learn spells, and that class is probably your optimum. You qualify for any race you would like (human is probably best). Your wisdom rules out cleric or anything cleric-related.
Hmmmm… Not sure what my stats would actually be but I’ll describe myself and take a rough guess:
STR: Very high natural lower body strength. Slightly below average upper body strength for my frame, but I work out my upper body to compensate, so I’m guessing 12 overall.
DEX: Fairly agile and have great hand-eye coordination, so I’d probably put 12, but I have bad manual dexterity, so I’d put 8 for that. So let’s take the average of the two and go with 10.
CON: I rarely get sick. I get only the “knock-you-on-your-ass” viruses. I also have a tendency to mutate viruses inside me and give them to other people. (My girfriend gave me a mild head cold once which I mutated into the mother of all colds.) I also keep in good physical shape by running. So I figure 14.
INT: I test at an IQ of 146. Since that puts me at a fraction of 1% of the populace, I’ll take an 18 for that.
WIS: Been married, owned a house, divorced. Had lots of life experiences that I’ve learned from. Decently wise, so I’ll put this at 14. (Wouldn’t have been that 10 years ago, though.)
CHR: I’m good looking and engaging, but I also likely have ADHD among probably some other things that can be off-putting depending on the person, so I’ll put a 12 for that.
Another mage there, Hoopy Frood, and a good one, though I’m sure you may end up wishing for a higher CON, DEX or both. You’re a strength point short of qualifying as one of FI’s few rangers but there’s no help for that (playing standard 1st Ed there are no half-orc rangers). A 14 WIS would make for a respectable but not wonderful cleric if your tastes ran that way; your CHA is far below par for a druid. (We’re running 3/3 for “base classes only” so far.) Want to pick one?
Cool!.
I think everybody should play Humans, since these are real character sheets, and, to my knowledge ,there are no non-human Dopers (at least since JDT was banned).
So, my stats:
Strength: 8
Dexterity: 7
Constitution: 10
Intelligence: 15
Wisdom: 8
Charisma: 7
The only class practical for me would be wizard, so wizard it is :).
As you wish. And your stats just about void any actual penalties, tho’ that 7 CHA is unappealing. Dagger, dart or staff as your first (and, for some time to come, only) weapon?
umm, staff I guess, seems the easier to use. (if not to use well).
Well, this does sound like fun!
Stats at a guess:
STR: 13. I work at a physical job, then I go to the gym a little, then I go home and surf the 'Dope and munch jelly beans. Evens.
DEX: Also 13. I’m handy with tools from that aforementioned physical job, and I’m good with knots and detail work.
CON: Boy, howdy, do I deserve this 16. I can walk and run good distances- endurance is my friend. I rarely and barely get sick, and I can hold my liquor, too.
INT: 17. I’m a big trivia hound, and really multidisciplinary in my knowledge- my (recent) college career ranged from high-level chemistry to ancient history to art and design.
WIS: 6. I tend to act without thinking, do things that defy common sense, and have to rework things in order to fix what I missed the first time.
CHR: 12. I’m not so physically attractive, but I’m personable and conversational, and I tend to move in many social circles.
Looking at this, I’m probably better suited to be a fighter than many listed here, and that’s a good contrast to what I’ve played in the other D&D game on here. But I’d also make a logical ranger, and I think that might be more fun.
ETA: A Clockwork Melon, if you’re cute and confident, you’re almost certainly higher than 11 on charisma.
/in
Maybe.
Stats to follow Just wanted to beat the rush
Ok So from the other thread my Stats:
From the first quiz site thing:
Alignment: A True Neutral
STR: 4
DEX: 4
CON: 8
INT(pt1/pt2): 14/14
INT: 14
WIS: 11
CHA: 11
From the 2nd site:
STR:7
INT:17
WIS:11
DEX:7
CON:11
CHR:12
Methinks I should go with the 2nd Site grouping, as having 4’s for both Dex and Str seems crippling.
But I have no idea how 1st Edition Characters work (I’m more familiar with 3 and 4).
So, I’ll defer to Mal’s advice here, what’s probably the best for me to be- high points 17 INT, and 12 CHR, but does the party really need another wizard? Or are we Dopers just naturally skewed to be a group of smart misfits with no physical skills?
But what do you pitch for me, Mal?
Either that, or Dopers are more likely to overestimate their INT scores 
Accepting appleciders’s estimation of his own attributes, he’d pretty much get kicked out of Fighting Ignorants if he were indeed qualified to be a 1st Ed ranger - unfortunately that 6 WIS scuppers his chances in that department (14 is the minimum - only monks and bards need higher). Fighter anyway?
ToeJam, having two 4s would indeed make you ineligible for any character class (not to mentioned crippled if they would let you in!). The 7s are better but rule out fighter and thief off the bat, leaving only the two spellcaster classes - you would make an indifferent cleric or a fair mage.
Fighter anyway. I may think about multi-classing to something else, just for variety, at a future date.
Let’s go with fair over indifferent then.
A neutral cleric would be really weird. I don’t even know how that’d work. Would he be indifferent to his God? Or just a Buddhist?
People able to change classes under 1st Ed rules are barred from FI for being too gifted! 
We’ll put you down as a frustrated ranger if you like…
What sort of weaponry would you like to gravitate towards, and do you prefer weapons over armour or vice versa when it comes to spending your starting money? You can pick up to 4 weapons to be proficient in.
Heh. No, there are plenty of neutral deities in the D&Dverse. A Lawful Neutral deity (such as the Greek goddess Nike) would have the attitude “Good and evil are irrelevant, but you must always keep your word and try to ensure others do too”. A Chaotic Neutral deity might be like the Greek Dionysius - “Get as sloshed as you can as often as you can, and do what you feel like at the time” - and a cleric of his would be just as likely to buy free food and drink for everyone in the tavern, or set it on fire and point and laugh at all the panicking. Another CN deity, Uller (the Norse hunter god), would just encourage a “You’re not the boss of me” attitude and again, doesn’t care much whether your whim of the day is to do good or ill - but if you gravitated too far one way or the other over time, he might be displeased that you were getting too predictable. CNs are apt to be difficult to get along with.
Another mage, then. Weapons?
What about “Fighter who thinks he’s a ranger?” Or “Flunked out of Ranger Camp?”
Long bow, long sword, daggers, and darts. Throwing knives fit under darts, right? How does dual-wield work? I predict that carrying a bunch of knives and throwing some of them during the fight will fight right in with that 6 in wisdom…
Preference to spending money on armor. I think with all these mages about, someone needs to be able to take some punishment.