If you plan to lose it at work-- beat this:
Caught a homeless guy hiding in my office (and doing something unpleasant)
**If you plan to lose it at work-- beat this:
Celibacy **
While singing Michael Jackson’s “Beat It” at the top of your voice.
**What do you refuse to do out of principle?
tipping when there is a delivery charge.
**
I see a flamefest on the horizon.
How do you find a good psycho therapist?
Psychologists/Psychiatrists in Calgary?
Do you have a narcissistic mother or sibling? How has this affected you?
Sentence fragments you would (or wouldn’t) want in your obituary.
Washington state man pulled over with corpse in truck
The Truth Is We Are All Animals, so…
What would it take for George W. Bush to mend his reputation?
“MEAT! Bush-man bring meat for the Pack, Pack forgive!”
Hugh Hefner is cool? Why??
"He’s just a cat and a monocle away from being a Bond villain."
C’mon, just because he has a mansion, just because he has a bevy of beautiful assistants, just because his name is often associated with the shaggin’ 60s, just because…okay, let me rethink this one.
Lack of Cheques in other countries
The Brits, the Scots, the Finns, the Danes, the Swedes…
I see them all, but no Cheques!
Caught a homeless guy hiding in my office (and doing something unpleasant)
A good reason to keep your dog hungry
How do you volunteer for jury duty?
Washing wet clothes
Yeah, you’ve got to do a couple loads of laundry for the judge to get on the really good juries.
All that old stuff on the walls at Cracker Barrel
Do dogs have self-control?
They won’t let me and Bubba in anymore because he kept peeing on the tractor wheels and stuff.
How sensitive are you about your height?
Question for very tall men.
Stop it! Just…stop it.
** Boy did I have those lyrics wrong!
Favorite “Rock” Instrumental **
Ratman? Whipout?
**Who are Native Americans?
The Brits, the Scots , the Finns, the Danes, the Swedes, **
Umm… no.
Should I Be Worried (Cats)?
Man arrested for alledgedly marinating cat in trunk of his car
Marinate, stuff, broil, fricassee…anyway you slice it, you don’t have to worry about those cats anymore.
** Besides QB, who can you build an NFL team around?
Bakers Dozen **
Need more than two alternates
Dramatic wedding cancellation stories
When Armadillos Attack…a Tale of Terror
Innocent people have been executed–does this change your stance?
R.I.P. Ady Gil [Sea Shepherd boat]
Funny thing happened in the lunch line today
I’m (finally) pregnant!
:eek:
A question for theists who believe in an omniscient God
How does the insurance claim process work in general?
Sorry, it’s so complicated not even God himself can explain it.
If you plan to lose it at work-- beat this:
It’s too nice to work.
Oh, never-mind then.
** Are anyone else’s doctor visits like this?
Man grows pea plant inside lung. **
No, I’d guess that was unique