Find the worst Wikipedia article!

[jjimm]

I am neither a defender or detractor of Wikipedia, and make a few small contributions. While a useful jumping-off point for better citations, there is some utter utter dross there. Let’s see who can find the worst article; or at least the worst paragraph.

My nomination is this entry on the Branch Davidians, which contains these gems:

In 1929, Victor Houteff, a Bulgarian immigrant, claimed that he had a new message for the Seventh-day Adventist Church. It was submitted in the form of a book entitled The Shepherd’s Rod. His claims were not accepted and were considered divisive by the leadership because he pointed out what he saw as their departures from basic church teachings and standards. Therefore, he was disfellowshipped (excommunicated) from the church.
[snip]
In 1955, after Houteff’s death, a split of this movement formed the Branch Davidian Seventh-day Adventists, headed initially by Benjamin L. Roden. “Branch” refers to the new name of Christ.

Was Houteff just a random Bulgarian immigrant? Was he part of the Seventh-Day Adventists? Who were the leadership? Where were they based? And finally, how did Jesus suddenly get called “Branch”? By whom? Deed poll?

Branch Christ, what a terrible article. But at least it has some substance. I’m sure we can find worse. I’m thinking obscure board wars, computer games, or Leet bitchery…

[jjimm]

Oh, and a second category for “most intricately banal”. Here I present etymology and usage of the word suxxor:

Suxxor (pronounced suhk-zohr) is a derogatory term which originated in warez culture and is currently used in multi-user environments such as multiplayer video games and instant messaging. The word is a modified version of the phrase “to suck”, and the meaning is the same as the English slang. It is the contrapositive of roxxor.

There are two main uses: as a verb and a noun. Using the word as a verb, one could say, “Dude, that suxxorz!”, meaning, “That sucks. It is not good.” Using the word as a noun, one might say, “You are the suxxor.”, meaning “You are a bad person; you are bad at what you do.” Literally translated, this means, “you are the suck,” but it could also mean, “you are a sucker (i.e. fool).” The two variations appeared independently: the verb version is antonymous to roxxor (Leet for “to rock”), and the noun could be a counterpart to haxor (Leet for hacker).

Suxxor is one of the early Leet words to use the -xor word-ending.

[Kyla]

Oh jjimm, I actually love those Wikipedia articles like the one on “suxxor”. Those in-depth discussions of completely inane crap just make me laugh.

[Tapioca_Dextrin]

@jjimm

My nomination is this entry on the Branch Davidians…

I was reading that page about an hour ago (but I didn’t write it, honest guv)

[ratatoskK]

Suxxor (…) is the contrapositive of roxxor.

Well that explains everything!!!

[Mangetout]

I’m pretty sure that this one:

Neural binding

(just a stub)

isn’t only incomprehensible because of the subject matter; IANANeuroscientist, but I recognise a stream of incoherent jargon when I see one.

[jjimm]

This paragraph in the Fark article is both delightfully trivial and badly written:

Tags that say “boobies” or “weeners” are used to post adult content or discussions, although recently “weeners” have faded away almost entirely and “boobies” have been diverted to Foobies.com, in order for Fark.com to be more acceptable to a wider variety of advertisers. At the early stages of Foobies.com, “weeners” would appear occasionally. Sometimes, “Foobies.com” links that were considered safe for work would appear on the main page.

[Surok]

The mayonnaise jar is delightfully pointless.

And desparately in need of editing by a native English speaker. But then it might lose some of its charm.

I’m particularly fascinated by ‘The mayonnaise jar is an icon of Soviet life’.

[jjimm]

Surok, that’s brilliant!

[Colophon]

@Kyla

Oh jjimm, I actually love those Wikipedia articles like the one on “suxxor”. Those in-depth discussions of completely inane crap just make me laugh.

Me too. I sometimes spend ages seeking out Wiki articles on arcane internet trivia and jargon that I have never heard of before. Some of the obsessive scolarship is quite unsettling.

[antechinus]

Not sure if the article on grunge is the worst, but it irks me no end.

This is written from a completely Seattle perspective. It reads as if grunge music arose from the Pacific Northwest of the USA. The term ‘grunge’ actually originated in Sydney, Australia in 1984. I know the bloke who came up with the term. I used to watch grunge bands like Scientists, Box of Fish, feedtime, Cosmic Psycos, Lubricated Goat, King Snake Roost and Southern Fried Kidneys before Mudhoney and Nirvana had even formed. These were all grunge bands. We refered to the as grunge.

Then it all came back, nicely marketed from the USA 10 years later - this new thing called grunge.

Aaarggh. I wish I was motivated or skilled enough to modify the wiki article to prevent this historical revisionism. Damn it, one of these days I might just start my own SD thread - ahh bugger it.

[Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor]

@Surok

The mayonnaise jar is delightfully pointless.

And desparately in need of editing by a native English speaker. But then it might lose some of its charm.

I’m particularly fascinated by ‘The mayonnaise jar is an icon of Soviet life’.

What an ideal choice.

Surok, your taste in Irrelavance is perfect.

The article has an almost Dada quality to it.

[Mighty_Girl]

@antechinus

Lubricated Goat

Any dopers in that band?

[Chez_Guevara]

@Surok

I’m particularly fascinated by ‘The mayonnaise jar is an icon of Soviet life’.

In that case I have some bad news.

The product is now also sold in 250gm plastic bags. But the real bombshell from this site is:

“Russian mayonnaise has a different goal than American,” Stepanov explained. “It isn’t as neutral.”

I wonder what the hawks in Washington are going to make of that. Maybe they are sitting down right now discussing the ‘mayonnaise gap’. It’s a serious problem. I envision raids over Moscow targetting all the major mayonnaise factories with smart bombs, followed by instructions to US mayonnaise manufacturers to make their product more aggressive.

[Surok]

Ah well, Russian mayo not being ‘as neutral’ as American would explain why we don’t get Hellman’s over here any more.

All that non-neutral Russian mayo has chased the sitting-on-the-fence American dressing off the shelves and out of the store.

Sometimes a bit more neutrality would go a long way in ensuring variety of salad dressings.

[jjimm]

I see the US is already rattling sabres and unveiling the prototype. We need to stop the mayo race now! Think of the children. Kumbayaaa my loooord.

[Surok]

@jjimm

I see the US is already rattling sabres and unveiling the prototype. We need to stop the mayo race now! Think of the children. Kumbayaaa my loooord.

jjimm, you could have warned me that that image was not for Dopers of delicate sensibilities!

now go wash your mouth out with hot chilli sauce.

[Colophon]

In Soviet Russia, mayonnaise JARS YOU!

[Ludovic]

In American politics, you are never neutral. In Russia, Mayonnaise is never neutral!

[jjimm]

False alarm. Stanislav Petrov informs me it was merely “snack creme”. The borschtonnaise has been stood down.

(Snack creme?!? :barf: )