Five-Word Movie Review

Movies with annoying sidekicks

Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom
Annoying kid later wins Oscar

The Big Lebowski
“Shut the fuck up, Donny!”

Beauty and the Beast
LeFou: Worst Disney Sidekick Ever

Next: Live Action Disney Princesses

Live Action Disney Princesses

Beauty and the Beast
Emma Watson can’t sing. Period.

The Princess Diaries
This grown man liked it.

Enchanted
Sends up tired princess tropes.

Break a leg: movies in which a character breaks a bone.

Rear Window
Wheelchair-bound guy spies on neighbors.

Misery
We all know what happened.

The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers
Mortensen actually broke two toes.

Movies with made-up languages.

The Day the Earth Stood Still
Tell Gort, “Klaatu barada nikto.”

Star Trek: The Motion Picture
First use of Klingon language!

The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring
Sindarin or Quenya? Your choice.

Next up:

Movies set on the weekend

Saturday Night Fever
Tony Manero has a dream.

Black Sunday
Most thrilling Super Bowl ever!

The Osterman Weekend
Sam Peckinpah’s last feature film

Next up:
Movies built around an over-the-top sex goddess

One Million Years B.C.
Raquel Welch, your typical cavegirl

And God Created Woman
Bardot was an international sensation

The Seven Year Itch
For Marilyn, I’m itchy oftener

Next up:

Movies built around a devastatingly handsome dude

Farinelli
Handsome castrato, fire in bed.

The Picture of Dorian Gray
Handsome libertine’s portrait absorbs sins.

Zoolander
Dumb model caught in caper.

More movies built around a devastatingly handsome dude

The Sheik
Rudolph Valentino became a superstar

Rebel Without a Cause
James Dean’s only top-billed role

Ocean’s Eleven
Clooney, Pitt, Damon: whatta lineup!

Next up:

Films involving pagan rituals

The Wicker Man
Bad doings up in Scotland…

Fellini Satyricon
Debauched even by Fellini standards

Apocalypto
Human sacrifice in old Mexico

Movies where a lot of police cars get destroyed

The Blues Brothers
About a hundred, I think

What’s Up, Doc?
Funny, destructive San Francisco chase

Hot Fuzz
Charming, sleepy English town… not!

Next up:

A cop… on the edge!

Lethal Weapon
Gibson: cop or third Stooge?

Dirty Harry
He fired six, not five

Bad Lieutenant
Keitel battles demons and superiors

Next: Kids acting like adults

Bugsy Malone
Gangster spoof, lots of yoots

Paper Moon
Con artist Tatum smokes, swears

Freaky Friday
Now, which is Mom again…?

Next up:

Movies with Native Americans neither reviled nor idolized

Let Him Go
Costner, Lane, helped by Native.

The Quick and the Dead
Spotted Horse? Just another competitor.

One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest
Chief Bromden? Just another inmate.

Next:

The Films of James Garner

Toward the Unknown
His screen debut, in 1956

36 Hours
Clever World War II thriller

My Fellow Americans
Garner as a former POTUS

Next up:

More James Garner movies

Marlowe
Baits Bruce Lee, who dies

The Great Escape
Con man assists blind prisoner

Victor/Victoria
A woman? He doesn’t care

Next: Cross-dressing roles

The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert
Drag holiday in the outback

Have you got two more, @DrDeth? We do three movies that fit the topic, then when you post three and review them, you post the next topic.

Let me pinch hit for him:

Some Like It Hot
Joe E. Brown: “Nobody’s perfect.”

The Crying Game
Hey, Jaye Davidson fooled me…

Movies where women cross-dress as men

I did not know that, sorry. Next time i will do three.

Thank you!!

Movies where women cross-dress as men

Swiss Family Robinson
“Cabin boy”? Not a boy!

Downfall
Hitler’s secretary escapes while disguised

Albert Nobbs
Glenn Close as secret-keeping butler

Next up:

Movies set in Ireland