Five-Word Movie Review

Movies from the 2010s (so far).

Green Lantern

Why does WB hate DC?

2012

Yet another Emmerich disaster film.

Man of Steel

Superman becomes a generic emo.

Next: Short Films

Short Films

The Critic
Early Mel Brooks; really funny.

The Woman In The Room
Astounding early Frank Darabont short.

De Duva (The Dove)
Madeline Khan rips Ingmar Bergman.

Next: **Film noir **

Short Films

Creature Comforts
Zoo animal interviews? Awesome concept!

The Red Balloon
Favorite film from elementary school

White Mane
On the same DVD – boring

Next: Film noir

Double Indemnity
Fred blames Barbara for everything.

The Lady from Shanghai
Mirrors, mirrors - everywhere you turn!

D.O.A.
I’m reporting a murder - mine!!!

Next up - films from 100 years ago or longer!

Films from 100 years ago or longer!

A Study in Scarlet
Sherlock Holmes solves a mystery.

Brewster’s Millions
He has to spend money.

His Majesty, The Scarecrow Of Oz
It’s hilarious: Scarecrow talks constantly.

(all of the above from 1914)

Next: Kurt Russell movies

Kurt Russell movies

Poseidon
This one sank itself, effortlessly

Used Cars
Completely tasteless, completely a riot

The Thing
You gotta be f@#$%^& kidding

Next: Theresa Russell Films

The Razor’s Edge
Best known as Murray bomb.

Whore
What it says on tin.

The Believer
Neo-Nazi is really Jew - oy!

Next: Movies from the 1910s.

Movies from the 1910’s

Cleopatra
The Vamp as Nile Queen.

The Colonel
Starring Bela Lugosi, no less.

The Gulf Between
Wow, an all color movie!
Next: Educational Films.

Educational Films

Mechanized Death
Saw it in Driver’s Ed.

Reefer Madness
1936 people were stupid, too

I Accuse My Parents
Juvenile delinquency? Chuckle, chuckle, guffaw!

Next: Albert Finney films

Murder on the Orient Express
Never saw a better moustache.

Miller’s Crossing
Irish gangsters play for keeps.

Skyfall
Crusty groundskeeper at big finish.

Next: Movies of the 1920s.

Movies of the 1920s

The Jazz Singer
You ain’t heard nothin’ yet!

Steamboat Willie
Mickey Mouse was actually funny.

The Phantom of the Opera
Chaney, Man of 1000 Faces.
Next: Movies where the story revolves around shoes.

The Red Shoes
Ahhhhh! Don’t put them on!

Black Swan
Did that picture just move?

The Computer Wore Tennis Shoes
Disney comedy does not compute.

Next: Movies of the 1930s

Movies of the 1930s

The Wizard of Oz
Color film was invented mid-movie :smack:

Frankenstein
Quintessential mad scientist monster movie

Hell’s Angels
James Whale was dialog director :confused:
Next: Tom Savini films

(Hey, somebody I’ve met!)

Tom Savini films

Machete
Expect nothing, you’ll be rewarded.

From Dusk To Dawn
Sex Machine has interesting gun.

Martin
The Godfather of Gore’s debut.
Next: 2014 Oscar nominees.

American Hustle
You mean that’s Christian Bale?

The Wolf of Wall Street
Well, he’s no Gordon Gekko.

Philomena
Irish woman seeks lost son.

Next: Movies of the 1940s.

Movies of the 1940s:

Fantasia:
Rereleased in 1969–wonder why?

The Grapes of Wrath:
Poor Okies head for California.

The Lost Weekend:
Milland drinks, suffers a lot.

Next: Murder mystery movies.

Murder by Death
Skulduggery at Two Two Twain.

Clue
Different endings, different killers, natch.

Blow-Up
Mod photographer shoots a shooting.

Next: Movies of the 1950s.

Movies of the 1950s:

Rear Window:
Voyeurism for good, this time.

The Bridge on the River Kwai:
Stockholm syndrome, before called that.

Ben Hur:
Chariot race great; rest overrated.

Next: Sidney Poitier movies.

He was at the Oscars ceremony tonight!

Sepia Cinderella
His screen debut, in 1947.

Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner
Racism is bad - got it?

Sneakers
Ragtag group of hackers wins.

Next: Films of the 1960s.

That’s what gave me the idea. I’ve got the Oscars on in the background.

Movies of the 1960s:

Dr. Strangelove:
Versatile Sellers, amidst nuclear madness.

The Sound of Music:
True story, with music, dancing.

My Fair Lady:
Hepburn stars in Shaw’s “Pygmalion.”

Next, because you seem to be heading in that direction: Movies of the 1970s.